Funniest DM/player faux pas

[Goddess FallenAngel]

I remember a flub by the GM that we still harass him over occasionally... the party was boarding a ship, and figuring out quarters - since we only had 2 cabins for three females and 1 male. None of the characters wanted to share quarters with the barbarian, and IC it was mentioned that the three women would share one of the cabins and the barbarian could have his own - would the captain have a problem with this?

The GM's response: "Don't worry, they enforce same-sex coupling."

There was stunned silence for only a brief moment before the laughter began.

 

[Kae'Yoss]

You win Kestral. I was giggling like a little schoolgirl after reading that. Plus I had quite an amusing mental image of a girl with the Stunning Snatch feat.

Probably Lidda the Halfling Rogue. Great pickpocket and thief. I've seen her snatch and it was amazing!

(I got that from the list of involuntary double entendres by british sports casters and the like. He was talking about a weightlifter. Some people call language inefficient, because the same words can mean different things. I wouldn't want to speak a language where that isn't the case!)

 

[DeeEight]

My most recent was when the party was fighting a monk bad guy. I was reading his bonus feats (Stunning Blow, Deflect Arrow and Snatch Arrows) and got a little tripped up.

"He uses his Stunning Snatch feat to catch the arrow"

The game was pretty much shot for the rest of the night.

Our GM (who you all know having hemoraged geek points a few messages ago) once said something in response to a question along the lines of "its that way because I'm the gay master" after one of our particularly LONG sessions.

 

[sniffles]

We still pick on the GM to this day about this one that occurred about 6 or 7 years ago.

He was determined not to use class names in describing NPCs. Our newly-formed adventuring group was fighting a bunch of NPCs, one of whom had a quarterstaff. The GM kept referring to this NPC as "the guy with the staff".

Until the guy with the staff fumbled his attack roll and the GM ruled that he accidentally hurled his staff across the room.

GM: "The cleric - um, I mean, the guy with the staff - goes to get his staff..."

Periodically when he describes an NPC we'll look at him and ask innocently, "The guy with the staff?"

 

[awayfarer]

I don't think this is exactly a faux pas; just a funny incident we'll never let the DM of our WLD game forget. I'm paraphrasing but the jist of it was this...

DM: "OKay, the were-rat is tripped and goes down."
ME: "I stab him with my daggers." (Rolls) "Will that hit?"
DM: "Yep, +4 due to porn."

To be fair, we game online and prone/porn a pretty easy typo to make.

 

[Dr. NRG]

The party became convinced that the monkey familiar of one character was responsible for stealing from them. He heatedly denied it, defending his familiar fiercely. Other characters continued to be suspicious, and somewhat facetiously demanded the familiar be punished. They debated a bit, and the call came forth for him to spank his familiar. Just as my neighbors happened by the open window, five or six players shouted at the player to spank his monkey. The timing was perfect, and the look on my neighbor's face was priceless.

NRG

 

[madriel]

I guess I should own up to my own golden shower story.

We'd just had a player leave the group due to his on-going personal problems. So Holy Bovine described a portal from another dimension opening up during our characters' breakfast and a voice commanding the warlock to come kneel at the feet of his Master in order to be punished for not fulfilling his part of their bargain.

A few minutes later, another player arrived late so his character wakes up and comes downstairs for breakfast. In and out of character he asks what happened to our warlock.

Since everybody else at the table either had a mouthful of Coke or pizza, I helpfully replied, "Oh, Tyr got sucked off by his Dark Master and he won't be back for a while."

The DM screen and several character sheets got a Coke shower while I got more and more tongue tied trying to clarify that he "got sucked into another dimension."

 

[Hussar]

Darn it Away, I was going to bring up the +4 due to porn bit. It's now standing policy to write "PR0N" under any fallen opponent.

Of course there's also the bit where one character says to the other, "Only a thief can appreciate a grappled ally."

 

[Olaf the Stout]

I guess I should own up to my own golden shower story.

We'd just had a player leave the group due to his on-going personal problems. So Holy Bovine described a portal from another dimension opening up during our characters' breakfast and a voice commanding the warlock to come kneel at the feet of his Master in order to be punished for not fulfilling his part of their bargain.

A few minutes later, another player arrived late so his character wakes up and comes downstairs for breakfast. In and out of character he asks what happened to our warlock.

Since everybody else at the table either had a mouthful of Coke or pizza, I helpfully replied, "Oh, Tyr got sucked off by his Dark Master and he won't be back for a while."

The DM screen and several character sheets got a Coke shower while I got more and more tongue tied trying to clarify that he "got sucked into another dimension."

I didn't think anything could beat the Stunning Snatch feat but you managed to do it. Congratulations. If I had been drinking anything then it would now be all over my keyboard and monitor by now.

I had to stifle my laughing in case anyone working near me asked me what I was laughing about. I really don't think that I could tell them.

Olaf the Stout

 

[Kestrel]

Glad you liked it Olaf

I think our game is 80% comedy and 20% actual play, but I wouldn't have it any other way.