Funniest DM/player faux pas

[DragonLancer]

I'll leave that to you my friend, you were the DM!

Actually it was Eddie, with his Council of Wyrms campaign.

Basically, we were playing young dragons (standard race in that campaign) and one player was playing a Gem Dragon with psionic (2nd ed psionics...) powers.

As I recall we were fighting a band of ogres in a cave system/dragon hatchery.

DM: "It's your go, what do you do?"
PC1: "I'll use my detonate power on the lead ogre."
PC2: "Only works on inanimate objects."
PC1: "Oh, ok. I hold my action."

Next round:

DM: "You're up. What are you doing?"
PC1: "I use my detonate power on the lead ogre."
ALL: "It only works on inanimate objects!"

When he still said the same thing on the 3rd round, I think we all clobbered him with inanimate objects!

 

[Kae'Yoss]

DM: "It's your go, what do you do?"
PC1: "I'll use my detonate power on the lead ogre."
PC2: "Only works on inanimate objects."
PC1: "Oh, ok. I hold my action."

Next round:

DM: "You're up. What are you doing?"
PC1: "I use my detonate power on the lead ogre."
ALL: "It only works on inanimate objects!"

We have a player like that, too.

"Okay, my second attack is.."
"You don't get a second hit, because you moved"
"But I use haste"
"Doesn't matter, As we told you a dozen times, more than one attack always requires a full attack action - so no move beyond 5 ft - no matter where the second attack comes from"
"Ah, OK. So, does my 25 hit?"
"Aaaargh!!"

He does it all the time. Often with the same stuff, which he apparently forgets every week.

 

[Storm Raven]

"Doesn't matter, As we told you a dozen times, more than one attack always requires a full attack action - so no move beyond 5 ft - no matter where the second attack comes from"

Well, not always - cleave and/or great cleave can give you a second (and third, and fourth . . . ) attack even if you don't use the full attack action.

But otherwise, yeah.

 

[Kae'Yoss]

Well, not always - cleave and/or great cleave can give you a second (and third, and fourth . . . ) attack even if you don't use the full attack action.

But otherwise, yeah.

Yeah, plus, there's things like Dual Strike. Thing is that the same situation (haste, or just moving and full attacks) periodically comes up.

It would be frustrating if it wasn't so funny

 

[blargney the second]

The Stunning Snatch and sucked off by dark master bits were brilliant!
-blarg

 

[Raloc]

I remember the first attempt to start a large campaign that I'd been working on for a couple of years. Everyone made their characters, I prepared, everyone got in game and we started. I was describing their arrival to an integral island by ship. Well, the description basically meandered on for a while until it hit the misspelled "ship". Oblivious, I continued writing the rest of the description only to be stopped when all the players started laughing as they read that they "sailed into the docks on their shi+". Some party infighting later, the session was cancelled and the campaign didn't start until several years later.

 

[donremus]

I remember the first attempt to start a large campaign that I'd been working on for a couple of years. Everyone made their characters, I prepared, everyone got in game and we started. I was describing their arrival to an integral island by ship. Well, the description basically meandered on for a while until it hit the misspelled "ship". Oblivious, I continued writing the rest of the description only to be stopped when all the players started laughing as they read that they "sailed into the docks on their shi+". Some party infighting later, the session was cancelled and the campaign didn't start until several years later.

Wow that's some serious shi+. Doesn't seem much to fight about, just have a few laughs and back on track.

Loved the stunning sucked off snatch stories

 

[Arkham]

Probably my worse DM faux pas was just this last Sunday.
The PCs are dealing with a trapped Pit Fiend, trying to get it to agree to wear the Helm of Opposite Alignment ( only vs evil ) one of the PCs crafted about 10 levels ago without resisting its effects, in exchange for freeing it from this epic lich queen.
While trying to work out a deal, the Pit Fiend says he could swear by the four rivers of hell to do so, and then he'd be bound, as a Devil, to do so.
A little more conversation, with one of the PCs saying that since he had already sworn to it, that they could free him, and it'd be all good.
And so I say, "I actually said I could, I didn't actually swear yet."

Everyone pauses.

Hand-strikes forehead. D'oh!

My darned pendantic self...

 

[KrazyHades]

Not exactly a faux pas, but a funny true story nonetheless. This had occurred some time ago, back in high school. I was the DM helping out a couple friends with leveling up, when my little sisters walks in. For those who don't know, this particular sister is not just in good favor with the dice gods, she IS a Die God. So, she says she's bored and wants to roll up a rogue. My friends and I watch as she grabs the 4d6, and rolls up her abilities.
Roll 1: 6 6 6 6
Roll 2: 1 6 6 6
Roll 3: 6 2 6 6
Roll 4: 6 6 6 2
Roll 5: 3 6 6 6
Roll 6: 6 6 6 6

And my friends and I were like..."GAH! NOT FAIR!"

 

[Pure Puppet]

I guess I should own up to my own golden shower story.

We'd just had a player leave the group due to his on-going personal problems. So Holy Bovine described a portal from another dimension opening up during our characters' breakfast and a voice commanding the warlock to come kneel at the feet of his Master in order to be punished for not fulfilling his part of their bargain.

A few minutes later, another player arrived late so his character wakes up and comes downstairs for breakfast. In and out of character he asks what happened to our warlock.

Since everybody else at the table either had a mouthful of Coke or pizza, I helpfully replied, "Oh, Tyr got sucked off by his Dark Master and he won't be back for a while."

The DM screen and several character sheets got a Coke shower while I got more and more tongue tied trying to clarify that he "got sucked into another dimension."

Congratulations. That one broke me. I had to stand up, walk away from the computer, and find a handkerchief to wipe my eyes just so I could SEE.

And my jaw hurts from laughing too hard.