funny happenings

[Nyaricus]

I got one myself. Back in 3.0, we were playing some horrible misanthropic party with a death slaad mage (my Dm's NPC/PC), a red dragon in human guise (we thought he was a half-dragon), a xill ranger (can anyone say "four shortswords") and a doppleganger rogue (thats me) with a warhammer.

So, we get into town, and the DM says that the guards are obviously distressed over seeing us enter the town - so they run and get the mayor. The red dragon decides to set fire to the town halls' roof (it was about 20 feet away). The mayor got angry and sent for the town champion - a level 13 barbarian. Everyone rolls init. My doppleganger rogue goes first - natural 20, natural 20, natural 20.

The best part was our DM describing it, "you lift your warhammer waaay over your head *makes hand motions to copy this statment*, and bring it down square on the poor buggers head - SPLAT *smacks hands together*

heh heh, way funnier in real life, but still brings laughs to some of the guys i play with.

 

[Macrovore]

nice, dude.
Keep 'em coming

 

[Nyaricus]

thanks yeah, that was a goodie.

Another story off the top of my head is when the same guy was DMing and it was the campaign after the misanthropic party described above. Basically, everyone was ragging on everyone, out of game, and it was really taking away from the actual game. Anyways, we were going into a sewer to look for so and so's daughter hidden away by some big baddie, and we had just killed some advanced Dire Rats. At this point, the DM was getting really peeved, and so started rolling dice behind the screen, and the following occured:

DM > ahem *clears throat* guys. . . Guys? . . . GUYS!!!!
Players > "WHAT??
DM > well, R's character (<--- that's me) is walking along, and . . . a house falls on his head. He's dead. Sorry; R, reroll a character.
Me > WHAT?? what the hell? this is crap (blah blah blah . . . .). Hey, wait a second, i get a reflex save for that, don't I?
DM > uhhh, no, you don't.
Me > and we are in the sewers. why would a house fall on my head in the sewers? that makes no sense. And YES, i would get a ref save for that.
DM > no, you don't. And YES, a house did just fall on your head.
Me > what the hell *other expletives* !!!! No, i get a ref save for it, if it could have happened at all.

etc etc etc

This went on for a long while, and we didn't really do anything more that campaign > it was abandoned in favour of a new one. That saying, "a house falls on your head" has stuck with me, and now i use that on my players, to keep them in line.

Remember kids: The DM is always right, even when he is wrong

 

[Macrovore]

plotnik was telling me about a one-shot dungeon he did where there was a munchkined (although mechanically sound) druid/beastlord (PRC from 3e, i think. trades spell progression for enhanced animal companions) that, as an animal companion, an elephant. a dire elephant. a colossal dire elephant. with a fortress on top. and a permenant wind wall effect. Friggin awesome. if i was him, i'd take leadership and get a bunch of human fighters with longbows. Think the ouliphants of Haradrim, but bigger and less turbans. and also no annoying whiny little effeminate elf ranger prick.

 

[Blade of Desecration]

plotnik was telling me about a one-shot dungeon he did where there was a munchkined (although mechanically sound) druid/beastlord (PRC from 3e, i think. trades spell progression for enhanced animal companions) that, as an animal companion, an elephant. a dire elephant. a colossal dire elephant. with a fortress on top. and a permenant wind wall effect. Friggin awesome. if i was him, i'd take leadership and get a bunch of human fighters with longbows. Think the ouliphants of Haradrim, but bigger and less turbans. and also no annoying whiny little effeminate elf ranger prick.

Yeah, though I'm going to have to look at that guys stats, to make sure the player did it right. Oh, and the elephants name was Stampy.

 

[Macrovore]

but it would be a good idea to have a bunch of human archer-fighters with 3 feats at first lvl!
maybe an arcane archer cohort.

 

[Mr_GrinReaper]

BoD was telleng me about once when his PC's were fighting a balor, it sundered one of the player's whip, so he used his scarf. Natural 20. Natural 20, and another Natural 20. Yes, the fighter decapitated a balor with a scarf. That would be a funny sight (later he wanted to make the scarf keen)

actually that was a story from some1 else told by bod, BoD and us diddnt do any of that.... X_X

Something that did actually happen is the bards death-by-goblin-3xcrit- (ill leave it to BoD to tell that one)

plotnik was telling me about a one-shot dungeon he did where there was a munchkined (although mechanically sound) druid/beastlord (PRC from 3e, i think. trades spell progression for enhanced animal companions) that, as an animal companion, an elephant. a dire elephant. a colossal dire elephant. with a fortress on top. and a permenant wind wall effect. Friggin awesome. if i was him, i'd take leadership and get a bunch of human fighters with longbows. Think the ouliphants of Haradrim, but bigger and less turbans. and also no annoying whiny little effeminate elf ranger prick.

And as to the one-shot, we haven't actually done that yet either, so i dunno what jon has been telling u but it aint the truth, the dire elephant is not illegal tho, and what he did do is buy a bunch of reduced balistae (since anything in "possession" of the target shrinks with it, that means the bolts do too, but as soon as they leave the ballista, they are no longer in the possession of it, so they grow back to normal... (Scary, eh!)

 

[Blade of Desecration]

actually that was a story from some1 else told by bod, BoD and us diddnt do any of that.... X_X

Something that did actually happen is the bards death-by-goblin-3xcrit- (ill leave it to BoD to tell that one)



And as to the one-shot, we haven't actually done that yet either, so i dunno what jon has been telling u but it aint the truth, the dire elephant is not illegal tho, and what he did do is buy a bunch of reduced balistae (since anything in "possession" of the target shrinks with it, that means the bolts do too, but as soon as they leave the ballista, they are no longer in the possession of it, so they grow back to normal... (Scary, eh!)

Nope, haven't told him we've started, just the insane things everyone has done with their PCs (I still need to look and make sure you're ninja is following the rules correctly, though he probably is). I'm starting to doubt we'll ever do the one-shot anyways, but we might get it in over winter vacation. Also, as I said, that story was on a thread on the WotC boards. I think that thread got deleted, but there are load of funny stories like it on one other thread (which happens to be 40+ pages long, I'll post a link when I have time). The goblin crit I've explained many times, but I'll tell it again to the people who haven't heard it, but tommorow, since right now I have to go to sleep.

 

[Macrovore]

and what of the ninja?

 

[Blade of Desecration]

and what of the ninja?

Thats the guy he's gotten up to +7000d6 sneak attack damage.