Great lines

Unfortunately I was the one to say this before drinking the unidentified potion. " There is no way there could be anything bad in a black bottle adorned with skulls..." RIP...
 

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The party came across a bear. The bear seemed friendly enough, and the druid started talking with it. The bear was friendly with people because he spent a lot of time around a nearby village.

Druid: "Bear, do you know of a way to sneak into the village?"

Bear: "Yes. Go into the village very, very quietly."
 

This one happened after my players encountered what I thought would be a particularly nasty and cruel trap. It was fairly simple, a spiked pit trap, but the walls were greased making it impossible to climb and twenty feet down was an illusion that made it seem impossibly deep. At the bottom there was a permanent silence effect. So when the party fighter stumbled into it and fell to the bottom, I thought "Aha! Now he is in a predicament. He cannot call for help and the trap is hundreds of feet down for all they know." No one in the party could cast fly, levitate, or anything like that so they had no way of finding out what had happened to their comrade.

I smugly wrote a note to the player of the fighter informing him of his terrible predicament and was surprised when he wrote back, "I swallow a potion of gaseous form and fly out."

I had completely forgotten about giving that potion to them a couple sessions earlier in treasure and didn't think the fighter of all people would be the one to end up carrying it!
 


I'm fairly certain our most memorable lines can be largely attributable to one particular player, but here's one of my favorites:

It was an Arcana Evolved game some years back, and the party has been chased into a narrow tunnel by a massive hydra. They're inside the tunnel far enough that it cannot reach them, but it's blocking the only exit. Suddenly, the magister (who is also the brilliant leader of this particular party) holds up a finger and says: "I've got an idea!" He then casts a spell which conjures a small electic monkey... which promptly gets out an electric "ook" just before one of the hydra's heads reaches in and snatches it up.

The whole group blinks quietly for about two beats. Then the litorian turns to the wizard and, in his distinctive deadpan gravelly voice, says: "So... what's your next plan...?"

Much laughter ensued.

Quotable comedy.
 

The party came across a bear. The bear seemed friendly enough, and the druid started talking with it. The bear was friendly with people because he spent a lot of time around a nearby village.

Druid: "Bear, do you know of a way to sneak into the village?"

Bear: "Yes. Go into the village very, very quietly."

A perfect quote from "Are You Smarter Than A Forest Animal?" D&D edition!

"Pussy likee fishee" said the Trogolodite PC to the Chimera while offering it a smoked haddock.
It did not end will.

How long did it take before the people rolling on the floor to regain their seats?
 

How long did it take before the people rolling on the floor to regain their seats?
Not too long, Aidan, the guy playing the Trog often came out with good lines but that was a high point. It has still stayed in memory 20 years after along with an explaination to the City Watch that began with the line "Me and my friends the shitmen".
 

Some great quotes from our RP table:

"Never poke a wounded dwarf." (This one made it in edited form to a Knights of the Dinner Table comic)

"Dolphins don't have pockets." - A great quote when the shapechanger realized they could not carry some objects back to the surface...

"I've been shot. That means we win." - From the player in SW who ALWAYS seems to get knocked down by damage before the battle is over.

Of course, there are also the horrible words that are made up too. And overused later...

Like "Badlandits" (Bandits from the badlands).
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Smoss
Doulairen (Doulairen)
Directly to tidbits about my d20 system:
RPG System (Doulairen)
 

My young and inexperienced hatchling gold dragon PC was having trouble grasping the meaning of the word "soul" that the other PCs bringing up in casual conversation. As he usually did when confronted with a new or confusing word (he was only a few months out of the egg) he asked the others for clarification. The party shaman gave it a shot: "It's an important part of you that makes you who you are; just like your legs or your arms. What would you be without your arms?" Without skipping a beat, my dragon PC answered: "A wyvern." That got a good laugh. :)

Recently, in another campaign, one player asked the party sorceror how his air elemental familiar could inflict damage if it was made of nothing more than air. The player answered: "It's a biting wind." *rimshot* :p
 

First, the party is trapped in the Pyramid of Shadows. They are confronting Karavakos in his lair. In this lair are floating two enormous orbs of arcane force, crackling with magical lightning. It is clear that you should probably avoid the orbs.

One player is thinking about moving underneath the orbs, and wants to know how much clearance there is between the orbs and the floor.

Unfortunately, he asks:

"How high off the ground are the wizard's balls?"



We are being intimidated/threatened/cajoled by an illusion of Orcus, who seeks to get us to turn back, or betray our friends. The dwarf Barbarian has a totem Spirit, Old Grandfather, who constantly berates him and gives him advice. Orcus starts booming out his threat to the dwarf, who interrupts him with the shout:

"Me grand-da' told me never to lissen' to a man wi' a pig head!".

If the dwarf's combat performance ever matched his performance on intimidation rolls, he would be truly impressive. As it is, he seems to be long on volume and short on technique.
 

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