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How could a vampire fake his own death?


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WayneLigon said:
1A normal kevlar vest will probably stop a wooden stake, I would think. You have bigger worries, like fire and daylight.

As noted by others, kevlar is designed to stop bullets. There are numerous stories of kevlar decidedly not stopping knives. A fire-hardened wooden stake isn't as sharp as a knife but I'm pretty certain a strong man, in the middle of a crisis situation - like a fight - could put one through a kevlar vest.

(http://www.darwinawards.com/darwin/darwin1999-05.html)

Greg
 

"oobleck".

I'll remember that if I'm ever asked to don an oobleck vest.
Is that the stuff that's made of corn starch, or corn powder or something of the sought?

That's all moot, however. A smart vampire cuts open his flesh along the bottom edge of the pectoral muscle, slides a nice and heavy ceramic plate underneath there, just over the heart, and then has a buddy do the same for his left shoulder blade.

*twitch, twitch*

Count Vladimir von Bulging-Manbreast, six million dollar vampire....

That's brilliant/. I'm always looking for ways to make genius-intelligence vamps overcome their weaknesses.
To pick a nit, I think the heart is actually located quite centrally, isn't it?
 

Dirigible said:
To pick a nit, I think the heart is actually located quite centrally, isn't it?

More nits: If you just slide it up under the muscle, you're gonna have issues. Those musles are anchored, for one thing, and the moorings will likely get in the way. For another, if you just slide it up there, there's nothing going to keep it up. Sooner or later, gravity will take effect, and that plate will slide down. Most vampires don't need much protection for their large intestines :)
 

Dirigible said:
*twitch, twitch*

Count Vladimir von Bulging-Manbreast, six million dollar vampire....

That's brilliant. I'm always looking for ways to make genius-intelligence vamps overcome their weaknesses.
To pick a nit, I think the heart is actually located quite centrally, isn't it?
If you scoot the plate just under where the pectoralis major tendons attach to the sternum, it will protect your heart against most angles. You could also simply anchor it against the inside of the ribs (but this would require stapling to keep it in place, and metal will cause other problems) or, if you have a lot of money, get a friend to open your chest up entirely and put a crafted plastic shield around your heart.

The heart is located somewhat centrally, but leans rather sharply to the left side of the body. Perhaps as much as 1/2 to 2/3 of the heart are to the left of the sternum, and that part which is immediately behind the sternum has better protection than any non-metal plate can likely provide.

One reason for choosing that particular location is that a vampire who can heal himself can quite easily shift the plate back into place; and if it slides down an inch every month, then every two weeks a small adjustment should suffice.
 

oh my boogieness...all this kevlar talk...just die in a plane crash over the atlantic for heaven's sake and be done with it.

You ppl are crazy. Not that it's a bad thing.


wolfen
 
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seasong said:
and if it slides down an inch every month, then every two weeks a small adjustment should suffice.

And if it slides all at once in an active situation (which seens reasonably likely if the vampire leads a lifestyle violent enough to require this protection), well, he'll feel a lot of pain and won't be able to bend at the waist all of a sudden. :D

Perhaps it's also important to note that putting a stake into a V:tM character's heart doesn't kill them. It puts them into a torpor. So staking isn't a method of killing, but of incapacitating the character. A method that requires either his cooperation ("Now stand still. You're going to feel a litte pressure and a slight sting."), or requires the assailant beat the character nearly to death before you use it.

If you're going to be near death when someone tries this, do you really want to make them work harder to do it? ("Gosh darn it! Wham! Blasted thing... Wham!... won't go in! Wham!") :)
 

Actually why bother with all these halfway measures and plates that could slip out of the way. Have a trusted (read- dominated) surgeon or a vamp with vicissitude remove the front half of your ribcage, line the inside with titanium 1/4" 6-in-1 weave chainmail with a backing of ballistic cloth, anchor it to the ribs and there you go.
 

FoxWander said:
line the inside with titanium 1/4" 6-in-1 weave chainmail with a backing of ballistic cloth....

Because chainmail is notoriously weak against piercing attacks. It's made to protect against slashes. Why bother with anything less than a solid plate?
 
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Actually why bother with all these halfway measures and plates that could slip out of the way. Have a trusted (read- dominated) surgeon or a vamp with vicissitude remove the front half of your ribcage, line the inside with titanium 1/4" 6-in-1 weave chainmail with a backing of ballistic cloth, anchor it to the ribs and there you go.

Startin' to sound more like ShadowRun now... :)

How about the vamp has his entire skeletomuscular system torn out, replaced by microhydrulic titanium/foamed-aluminum supports with myopolymer muscles, including a compressed carbide battlespur in the forearm?
 

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