Exactly, this has always been my perspective. In my games, I may not include sexual violence, but I do include elements of extreme gore, dark philosophical themes, suicidal NPCs, and extremely bloody and dark descriptions. Yet, although I am often one who pushes back against "Political Correctness" and "artificial social mechanisms", even I must admit that I have never had the heart to be so callous as to not ask my players whether they're comfortable with certain themes, mostly because I try my best to not be a jerk.What's appropriate at the gaming table is decided at the gaming table.
There's nothing wrong with depicting any degree of graphic sexual violence, or any other uncomfortable subject matter, at the gaming table... as long as every participant has given their informed consent beforehand, and the game stops when any participant's enjoyment of the game stops.
That's not what happened here, and it's the biggest point that edgelords tend to overlook.