How to ruin a campaign? ;)

[Ao the Overkitty]

Play a sexually charged character that has no preference for his partners. Hit on every man, woman, sheep, horse, or dog that comes along.

It's good for hilarious side effect.

Been there. Not sure which was funnier. Asking, when we ran into a Minotaur Administrator, if it was a CUTE Minotaur or the DM's face when he randomly rolled and found out it was.

Things do get out of hand when another player's character decides to follow your lead, though.

 

[cyferwolf]

turn it into a drinking game.

have shot whenever the dm syas something used fairly regularly, like spot check or fort save.

i've been told such games degernate rather quickly.

 

[milotha]

I find that openly mocking the GM and the NPCs works really well. Try coming up with a silly ditty to sing about any of the NPCs. Try making such comments as "Is this the point where I'm supposed to pay attention?" during an important NPC monologue, or perhaps the old "I waste him with my crossbow" or best of of "Huh? Oh, we're in combat. I hadn't noticed."

I try to pay as little attention as possible. Spend more time enjoying the snacks, reading a book - especially a non gaming book, or folding you laundry. This can be furthered by falling asleep at the table. Don't prep any spell lists, don't plan your action during someone else's turn. Take the maximum amount of time to do anything. It's also best to constantly lose you character sheet or fail to bring it to the session. Never do any levelling away from the table. Be as indecisive as possible.

Next, completely ignore the GMs plot hooks. Or even better, intentionally fall for all the red herrings and actively derail the session this way. Throw away or sell all the plot items. Kill all the important NPCs, or run away from every encounter proclaiming that your character wouldn't involve themselves with such a situation.

Lastly, completely trash the GM's house if you game there. Be sure to bring the most destructive of all snacks such as cheetos, and powdered donuts. Don't clean anything up and be sure to spill your soda at least once per session all over the battlemat and everyone's character sheets.

 

[Jim Hague]

After reading this thread, I'm very, very, very glad I don't game with the sort of maggot that would even suggest this. People that pull this kind of crap at my table get shown the door. They don't have to put up with a game they don't like, and I don't have to worry about GMing for immature twits.

As far as humor goes...eh, no. If nothing else, the responses here really underscore the need (and apparent fear of) Gm/player communication.

 

[Kae'Yoss]

People that pull this kind of crap at my table get shown the door.

With some of the things they suggest, I'd show them the window. I would *not* open it first.

 

[Inconsequenti-AL]

Assume every NPC is an overweight transvestite called Bob Wire. Interact with them accordingly.

Offer the GMs mountain dew and vodka... Wait until they've had 4 or 5. Babble at them, run around the room and generally act all confusing.

Faux Evil. Buy a white cat. Shave characters head. Mwah hah ah ha. And so on. It'll get old real fast.

Don't wash for several weeks as preparation for each game session. (This may impact your non gaming life slightly )

Play a wizard. Insist on polymorphing into pointless and/or stupid things. Goldfish, for example.

 

[starkad]

Gosh the venom from some folks in the thread is kinda weirding me out. Do you actually think that I'd do any of the things I suggest? Hell, I've been running D&D for over 2 decades, have only kicked 2 players out of my group ever, and advocate (sometimes cornering players to get a straight answer) talking to me to let me know if my game sucks, is good, or where it could improve. These days, I don't even have to seek them out; they come to me.

And while you're quite right that if anyone pulled most of these stunts in the thread, I would eject them from my game (and I have had to twice). But dude, I'd wager that 95% of this thread is humor.

 

[William Ronald]

Things to ruin a campaign that I have unfortunately seen. This all happened towards the end of a gaming group that collapsed last year. (The campaign setting and the group was good for most of the 21 years that I was in it.) So, DM's here are someways to ruin a campaign and alienate players.

The DMs pet NPCs are not only vastly more powerful than anyone in the party, they are even more knowledgeable than characters who are considered among the most knowledgeable people in the world.

Rules, what rules? The DM decides that he will allow any book into the game, and not tell people what is being used. That's right. You may be using the core rule books or WotC books. However, the person next to you may be using rules for several different D20 games and products -- without you knowing it. Set no guidelines.

Balance. Have a wide disparity in power levels among the characters. Have certain skills and focus areas of characters such as knowledge and diplomacy be about as relevant as basket weaving. Allow some characters to have access to equipment that outshines the abilities of some of the fellow PCs. (Yes, those wonderful artifacts without any side effects or consequences.) Allow some characters to suddenly excel in areas where they showed no competence -- have magic items take the place of skill ranks or class levels. Increase the disparity so that many players feel their characters are about as important to the group as luggage.

Exploit rules loopholes: If something is theoretically allowed by the rules, such as absurdly powerful skill bonus items, allow it. See Balance above for telling other players what is allowable. See balance comment for impact on characters.

Consistency: Be willing to change major characters, background, and history at the drop of a hat. Have villains pop out of historical eras which no one even knew existed before -- except the DM's pet NPC. Treat any questioning of this with dismissal or derision. Feel free to let verisimilitude break down so players of long standing no longer have any belief in the credibility of the setting or the DM.

Respect: My way or the highway is a great attitude -- to get people to leave your game. So is diminishing someone's contributions to a campaign and expanding your own contributions. Do not even consider other opinions. Play favorites and allow some people to do things that would have other people being read the riot act.

The cure for this, from a player's view, is to walk away. From a DM's point of view, some self-reflection might be useful.

 

[Henry]

Let's please remember to keep this thread healthy and happy, and insult free.

Now, shadow, if you are looking for TEH FUNNY, I got a million of 'em!

If you are looking for serious suggestions, it doesn't get any better than Mouseferatu's advice. The Dm's a person too: It's better to respect someone and just NOT play that game, than to play and make a mockery of something they spent hours putting together. If I were a player, I wouldn't want my DM taking a serious character and forcing that PC to wear bondage leathers and play Dodgeball.

 

[William Ronald]

Let's please remember to keep this thread healthy and happy, and insult free.

Now, shadow, if you are looking for TEH FUNNY, I got a million of 'em!

If you are looking for serious suggestions, it doesn't get any better than Mouseferatu's advice. The Dm's a person too: It's better to respect someone and just NOT play that game, than to play and make a mockery of something they spent hours putting together. If I were a player, I wouldn't want my DM taking a serious character and forcing that PC to wear bondage leathers and play Dodgeball.

When in doubt, it is better to walk away. Different DMs and players can have different tastes, so it is disrespectful to purposefully ruin something someone else made.

On a lighter note, most DMs do improve with time as there is a learning curve. Of course, two things that I believe that are crucial to making both a campaign and gaming group work are having similar goals and communicating with each other. This helps to ensure respect, trust, and that everyone has a good time.