D&D General [Humor] Things You Hate About 7E

[Lakesidefantasy]

I hate that they're charging me $4.99 for the basic greatsword. When I pay $35 for my barbarian ($15.99 basic class, $10.99 berserker archetype, $7.99 "necessary" enchantments) I expect it to come with a greatsword/greataxe/great club.

No wonder so many people now play weaponless brawler builds.

 

[Willie the Duck]

I find 7E's rules on vision and stealth to be almost as bad as all the other attempts that have been made. Clearly I can see the moon at night regardless of the distance between myself and it. I mean, in real life I can see the finer details of New Musklandia at night, when they are not eclipsed by thousands of satellites.

Hating Edition X is treasonous. Refusing to call it Edition X is also treasonous. Please report to the nearest termination booth for summary execution.

Rolling Paranoia into the D&D rpg umbrella might have been a bad idea as well. Same with doing so for the real world.

Why, oh why did they have to remove owlbears from the MM?
Sure, it was a little awkward when the AI-generated, life-printed owlbear got loose at the “Mutantz & Mysogonistz” attempted relaunch rally and ate Musk and LaNasa, but that hardly justifies replacing them with owlbards in the new edition.

They went over this. Anything that exists in the real world now goes in the Created Creatures expanded content DLC. The Monster Manual only includes non-existent entities like liches, wraith, and polar bears.

 

[Umbran]

I’ve seen Samoan bouncers, this isn’t just hypothetical.

This reads like, "Eh, there are no Samoans on the boards, so I can call them smelly and nobody will mind,"

Maybe don't insult people based on their ethnicity. And don't expect, "It was for a joke," will pass muster with a moderator.

 

[Reynard]

After some experience with it, I think I was initially too harsh on the 7E ranger. I really like the way they get three feats per level, plus spells, plus herbal remedies, plus pet attacks, plus favored terrain and enemies and weather and climate and time of day. They are still a little boring compared to the Fighter, tho.

 

[Autumnal]

Well, this is me having completely screwed up a joke, delivering more racism than humor. As I often say, intent isn’t magic, and my intent isn’t magic either. I appreciate being criticized in the official voice when I needed it, and this was that. Hopefully I won’t need another any time soon.

 

[MichaelSomething]

7E got you down? Have you considered Level Up 3E? The same people behind the world's greatest TTRPG forum also made a version of 7E that fixes all the problems with it!

 

[Mirrorrorrim]

The 3D neural interface environment for the Neural Tabletop (NTT) is pretty, sure, but I don't like how every class acquires their spells, maneuvers, and magic items through random loot boxes. We want to play a L20 one-shot first against the Petulant Tantrum Tarrasque, then the Muscle Mommy Tarrasque, but the powers I want for my build are not dropping! I got two Wish drops (worthless because my DM makes wishes a trap option), but still no Accretion Disk of Annihilation, which is one of the few ways to harm it. Ugh. Just drop already!

 

[Vaalingrade]

So did anyone's else's Warlock chapter generate as mostly a script for Charmed with references to the Infinity Gauntlet?

Also, I'm not sure what yo do with this part on the Death and Dying section talking about the infinite desert and horse named Binky.

 

[Mirrorrorrim]

So, when I signed up for the 7E "Living Multiverse" program, where we physically get to Astrally project our consciousness to Sigil and every other campaign setting, I was hoping for some Humblewood action! But due to queue times, I kept getting sent to Ravenloft, which is NOT FUN. I can't handle the jump scares and the madness mechanic may actually be impacting my mental health. I know the "verisimilitude" camp won the Design Games, but I think they went too far. I may be undead now, I'm not sure.

 

[MechaTarrasque]

The Ferret totem barbarian totally invalidates my Squirrel totem barbarian.