Is the DM the most important person at the table

[prabe]

Name any amount you like. I'll take that bet. When I was last burnt out (a couple of year stretch) no one GMed at all. We played board games, chatted, etc.

I've been in groups that experienced this.

 

[Fanaelialae]

Playing the first time was difficult as well.

Dm'ing doesn't have to be a huge time sink. For some reason those that sink a huge amount of time into it are idolized but that's not necessary and doesn't necessarily make for more fun adventures.

It's more fun to do something you are comfortable doing.

Playing the first time might be difficult if you haven't familiarized yourself with the game. Even then, those who are familiar with the rules will generally hold your hand and walk you through it.

Can you honestly imagine DMing without being familiar with the game? I can't. That's up there in "showing up for the exam in your underwear without having studied" levels of nightmare IMO.

Time saving techniques are great, but they're really an advanced technique for anyone who isn't already familiar and comfortable with improvisation (since they tend to leverage that skill a lot). Hands down, the most common mistake I see inexperienced DMs make is over-preparation. Because it helps them feel comfortable and secure. Unfortunately, it can also easily lead to stress and burnout, which makes them not want to DM.

 

[macd21]

So, if someone approached you and said “I’m thinking of GMing a game”, what would you tell them? That it’s really hard and their game will suck until they get better?

Why would I do that? I’ve had people do just that, and I’ve volunteered to play in their game and given advice when they asked for it. Telling them it will be hard and that they’ll suck would just put them off, and the only way you get good GMs is to have people go through that stage and get better.

 

[Greg K]

That’s a huge assumption you’re jumping to. I’ve spoken to people about GMing. Some have done it, but don’t want to do it again - they found it difficult, time consuming, and not as fun as playing. Others have never done it, and refuse to do it. Others have done it, and found they’re bad at it, to the extent that other players are reluctant to be in their games.

GMing is a skill, and not one everyone has. It’s not magic, and you get better with practice, but not everyone wants to. It would appear you’re fortunate enough to have numerous GMs in your local group, but as has been pointed out, that’s not the norm.

If I want to game, I have to run. We used to have two other players that GM'd every now and then to give me a break when I need one. One of those players moved cross the country and the other burned bridges as a LARP GM with my godbrother.
Now, my godbrother would GM if given a chance but he is not very good at it in a tabletop setting unless it is World of Darkness. When the two players above were in our group, they made it clear after one session of him running fantasy that they would not come back for a second session run by him. Knowing he was inexperienced, I was willing to cut him some slack and provided advice on pacing and other elements where he is weak. However, he never took the advice and the other players refused to game with him after another session. When we brought in new players to the group, he offered again to run and his same weaknesses as a GM resulted in the others refusing to let him run (after two sessions, we were still stuck in the same building of a a side encounter being attacked by more hordes of orcs).
There is also one other person that has DM'd D&D, but he refuses to run as his best friend will min-max and take advantage of his inexperience with the rules and DMing (which he will not try when I run).

 

[atanakar]

DMs are not the most important person at the table, but its like a box of Harry Potter candies, you don't know what you get until you taste it. Many poeple want to be DMs but only a few are truly good at it.

 

[Lanefan]

If the DM leaves, then, someone else will become the DM...

Not necessarily.

I suppose if there's other DMs in that game as players then sure, one of them is likely to take over. But my own experience is that most of the time there's far more just-players than there are player-DMs*, meaning that if the DM leaves the group either drifts apart or moves on to another activity entirely (Magic cards, IME).

* - and when there are player-DMs often they're already running their own game while playing in this one, and don't have time to take on a second game as DM.

 

[Lanefan]

I've never seen a good DM who wasn't also a good player (they make some of the best because they appreciate what the other DM is going through).

I have.

One guy I used to both play with and DM was an absolute horror as a player for a whole list of reasons; let's just say that rather nasty arguments were commonplace whenever he played.

Then he started DMing, and somehow he was able to channel all those bad aspects and all that ego into becoming a quite good and entertaining DM for many years. The only thing that prevented me from playing in his game longer than I did was time constraints.

 

[Lanefan]

That’s never been my experience. Mostly we play at the house of whoever has the best house for getting together and playing at.

Thing is, the DM has gobs more material* to haul around than do any of the players; making it far easier to just run at the DM's place - which also makes the DM the host.

* - board, minis, props and supplies, game notes past and present, rulebooks, character sheets**, dice, etc.
** - standing rule here is that character sheets stay with the DM between sessions.

If I'm DMing a full session "on the road" the stuff I have to take with me nearly fills the trunk of my car...except the board, which doesn't fit and has to go in the back seat.

we don’t come to my little apartment when I’m gonna run a game, we go to my buddy’s place. That doesn’t make him more important than other players

Actually it does, in that if he* decides he doesn't want you there you're stuck looking for a place to play.

* - or someone else living there who's not involved in the game, which IME is more common.

 

[Lanefan]

Because I don’t think it’s a lie. I don’t think that it is significantly harder to DM than to play.

I do.

As a player I can focus on my own character and on whatever's going on around it, and otherwise switch my brain off - particularly if I'm playing a dumb Fighter and-or when my PC isn't involved in the action of the moment.

But as DM I have to always be aware of what the party - and each PC - is doing, of what the game world is doing around them, of where the PCs are on the map, and of the personalities and reactions of any NPCs they meet. I also have to know the mechanics of whatever foes they're fighting and play those foes as best I can.

Add to this I also have to take notes on proceedings (my memory's not that good!), while at the same time trying to "read the room" and assess how the players are responding to whatever's going on. And sometimes be a referee.

In short, I need to be "on" a much higher percentage of the time when DMing than I do when playing.

Further, while a player can largely ignore the game between sessions if s/he wants, the same isn't usually true of a DM. Sure there's some who can wing everything on the fly, much like a rapper who makes up the words as he goes along, but those are a rare breed: most DMs, like most rappers, have to prep what they're doing at least to some extent.

There are plenty of ways to make the job easier, and plenty of ways for the group to work together. I’m personally not the rules guru at my table. I lean on one player to be my spell guru, and another for combat rules. I have another player track initiative. We divvy up the maintenance jobs of the game so that the DM can focus on the NPCs and the world as they reapond to the PCs.

This presumes having players who are willing to take on these sort of tasks. Not all are.

 

[Lanefan]

I guess I should give a bit of context to my remarks above: I'm used to systems where a lot of rules and mechanics are not player-facing, which - both as player and DM - is how I like it.

DMing would, of course, be somewhat easier if running a system where a greater proportion of the mechanics are player-side; by the same token, playing in such a system would likely be a bit harder.