I sometimes wonder:
Are some folks trying to make racism seem more prevalent by identifying so much little stuff as racist.
or
Are some folks trying to make racism seem overblown by identifying so much little stuff as racist.
I think this world would be a lot happier if we only took offense when someone actually intended offense.
Bullgrit
I think you've hit on an important point.
We're going through - largely enabled by the internet and the communication it offers, but historically it happens over and over again - a large social change. The internet is a wonderful tool in its ability to enable or support such things. This change is primarily focused on race, gender, and sexuality right now, and its very high profile.
The overall outcome will be social change for the better. But big changes require a decreased level of tolerance for minor issues, because that trickles through. So in any social upheaval, you get a whole class of people who object to what they consider minor infractions being elevated to a higher importance.
That, unfortunately, is just too bad -- that's how social change gets powered. And yeah, it probably bothers some people, but that's OK too. It happens constantly, all the time, throughout history. When many of the inequalities in these areas improve, it'll be other stuff - ageism, nationalism, something else. And a bunch of different people will get upset about that; but that will be OK, too.
It's OK to find it annoying that the way things are phrased gets so much attention; but unfortunately, however annoying it can be, it's necessary. And people being annoyed is better than people being discriminated.
Make no mistake, something as trivial-seeming as language is an incredibly important and powerful agent of change. And the changes people strive for are changes for the better, and language is a fantastic tool in that battle.
And it's working.