Is this race balanced?

[Geoff Watson]

Thanks, all! ECL 0 it is!

I was thinking something like 2 flasks per day...not sure. In the campaign world, they live near a sacred oasis lake whose waters act like holy water.

Not much of a limitation if they get free holy water.
They won't be able to travel far from their oasis. Not good adventurer material.

Thanks! Here are a couple ideas to offset that...

Embalming Fluid: This simple magical concoction, when applied to a corpse acts as a gentle repose spell cast at 6th level. It has the additional property of healing 2d4 hit points of damage when applied to a Maa-Kheru by someone with Knowledge (Religion) on a DC 15 check. A Maa-Kheru can only benefit from Embalming Fluid once a day. This is the only known method for healing a Maa-Kheru.
CL 6th; Brew Potion, gentle repose; Price 1,500 gp; Cost: 750 gold + 50 XP

That's an expensive potion of cure light wounds!
Why so expensive? An oil of gentle repose would only cost 300gp.

Feat: Channel Negative Energy
When you are affected by an undead’s energy or ability drain powers you may attempt to channel the negative energy into either healing for yourself or to disrupt the undead’s existence.
Prerequisite: Maa-Kheru only.
Benefit: When an undead attempts to use its energy drain or ability drain power on you, make a character level check modified by your wisdom, opposed by the undead’s hit dice check modified by any turn resistance it possesses. If you succeed, the undead takes 1d6 damage for every negative energy level that would have been bestowed and/or 1d4 damage for every point of ability drain. If you fail, however, your normal racial defenses against such attacks are temporarily lowered for the purposes of this attack only. Alternatively, you may heal 1d6 damage per negative energy level, and/or 1d4 damage for every point of ability drain. Note, that Maa-Kheru who have tried to be intentionally drained that they may use this feat find that it does not function; apparently, you must perceive a real threat in order for the feat to work.

Weird. So the player has to make a 'bluff DM' skill check to use this for healing?

Scouring Sands
Necromancy
Level: 3
Target: One corpse, one undead, or 20 lbs./level of matter
Components: V, S, M, DF
Duration: Instantaneous
Range: Close (25 ft +5 ft/ 2 levels)
Casting Time: Standard action
Saving Throw: Fortitude for half
Spell Resistance: No
Sand creeps over the target, hastening its natural rate of decay. Unless a saving throw is made, all dead matter rapidly decays into fine dust indistinguishable from sand. Already rotted matter, such as dirt, is unaffected by this spell. Anything that is arguably still living (a person turned to stone, freshly hewed wood, or a dying creature) or never was living (stone, metal, or water) is unaffected.
Against a corporeal undead opponent with some remnant of flesh (i.e. not skeletons), this spell inflicts 2d6 + 1 hp/level. On a successful save, the undead takes half damage. Against one of the Maa-Kheru (Unliving), this spell is also effective as an offensive measure, inflicting damage as above, though it has the added effect of a neutralize poison and remove disease spell as well. When an allied spellcaster uses it on a Maa-Kheru, the caster may opt to “pull the punch” (so to speak) and simply inflict 2d6 damage (not the extra +1/level).
Material Component: A scarab fashioned out of baked dung.

Also weird. What classes can cast this?
Is it supposed to be a 'heal maa-kheru' spell that can do other things?
Not worth the effort of researching. There are plenty of more efficient anti-undead spells, and why not use neutralise poison or remove disease for maa-kheru?

Overall, I think the race is silly (yet another not-really-undead race); they can't really adventure (need to stay at their holy oasis), need allies who know their ways (gifts of neith), can't heal, etc.

What is your purpose for creating them?

Geoff.

PS: Is the Gifts of Neith anything to do with Edena of Neith?

 

[Shogun Jakalo]

This race is by far the most original PHB-like race I've seen in a while, but one thing worries me, in the epic level handbook, (which i left at a friends house, and must recal from memory) I remember reading a system for characters to increase their so called "negitive H.P. Capacity" and it could go for all races, eccept, undead, and constructs. (obviously) so one of the greater benifits my be over-riden by this rule. to use this clas it would be best to eliminate the posibility of this rule before play of a new capaign. (so nobody gets pissed) another thing is, if these must be wraped in special cloth, there needs to be an item description for such a thing, and what happens if it gets destroyed. did sombody forget that clerics have a spell that creates holy water, and another that makes it from regular water, the ladder is an ORISON! this makes them superb adventurers, I feel. There inly sorce of food comes from clerics, and a lake, so they must travel with the cleric. my suggestion for a creation story is a great cleric redeemed undead, and to keep them from depending on negitive energy for life, they were given holy water. theres one big-ass problem that dwarfs all... FIND ME A ING CLASS FOR THESE THINGS!!! there should be an experiance peanalty for taking cleric, because it's cheap, but the monk healing ability would be a waste of a class ability. all these things concidered, good job on the thinking outside the box.

 

[Geoff Watson]

This race is by far the most original PHB-like race I've seen in a while, but one thing worries me, in the epic level handbook, (which i left at a friends house, and must recal from memory) I remember reading a system for characters to increase their so called "negitive H.P. Capacity" and it could go for all races, eccept, undead, and constructs. (obviously) so one of the greater benifits my be over-riden by this rule. to use this clas it would be best to eliminate the posibility of this rule before play of a new capaign. (so nobody gets pissed) another thing is, if these must be wraped in special cloth, there needs to be an item description for such a thing, and what happens if it gets destroyed. did sombody forget that clerics have a spell that creates holy water, and another that makes it from regular water, the ladder is an ORISON! this makes them superb adventurers, I feel. There inly sorce of food comes from clerics, and a lake, so they must travel with the cleric. my suggestion for a creation story is a great cleric redeemed undead, and to keep them from depending on negitive energy for life, they were given holy water. theres one big-ass problem that dwarfs all... FIND ME A ING CLASS FOR THESE THINGS!!! there should be an experiance peanalty for taking cleric, because it's cheap, but the monk healing ability would be a waste of a class ability. all these things concidered, good job on the thinking outside the box.

Bless Water requires 25gp of components. No non-adventurer would be able to afford 50gp/day, even if had a suitable cleric handy. A cleric level would be a must for these dudes.

Geoff.

 

[Quickleaf]

Maa-kheru flavor text

Thanks for all your comments! I will first post the flavor text for the race, then reply.

New Race: The Maa-Kheru
The Maa-Kheru are descendants of sanctified undead that were awakened by Neith and promised eternal life if they would lay siege to Antekh and punish the wicked king Othirsis for his tyranny and blasphemy. Those that survived the battle with the Kauathian Knights, though few in number, joined the people of Antekh in the aftermath. These undead were blessed by Neith with the ability to procreate, and their children were known as the Maa-Kheru, or “true of voice.” They were given this name after the myth of the weighing of the heart. It was said the heart of a worthy soul was weighed as the soul reported a negative confession, declaring its abstinence from evils. If the heart weighed less than a feather, the soul was called “true of voice” and given a place in heaven. They are extremely rare beings, numbering about 1200 in Antekh, and 900 in Nedj-Akhet.

Personality
Once fiercely loyal to their living allies, the Maa-Kheru have become jaded after years of being treated as little more than unseen servants. Their personalities are intense and their memories long. A friend or a foe is never forgotten, and a Maa-Kheru will go to great lengths (often considered insane) to right a wrong, and especially to hunt down those who have violated them or the sanctity of death in some way. It is better to be thrown into the fireplace than be the target of a Maa-Kheru’s vendetta. Maa-Kheru are especially hateful of undead, and oppose them at all possible opportunities, even if it means putting aside another rivalry. Only those undead that are clearly good-aligned are granted mercy from the Maa-Kheru’s wrath. A Maa-Kheru straddles the boundary between life and death, and feels a constant conflict in their being, often expressing itself as a ferocious nature. Like the goddess that woke them, Maa-Kheru are known for their ferocity in opposing those who threaten civilization.

Physical Description
The average adult Maa-Kheru male stands between 5-1/2 and 6 feet tall, and weighs between 120 and 180 pounds. Females are about six inches shorter and 50 pounds lighter. The Maa-Kheru appears as a wrinkled and shriveled corpse with translucent white hair (if any at all). Its skin is rough and bound tightly about the bone, adopting a dark brown color as if it had been preserved by natron and aged for decades in the desert. The Maa-Kheru’s eyes are milky as in the dead person’s complexion; both the iris and pupil are a pale, nearly white, hue. Most often, they adopt the clothing of the community in which they live, though some Maa-Kheru observe the practice of wrapping themselves as a mummy. A Maa-Kheru is considered an adult at the age of 15, and can “live” for a very long time indeed; the oldest known Maa-Kheru is said to be over 600 years old. Maa-Kheru that survive this long do not die, rather they enter a deep sleep from which they do not awaken. This sleep is referred to as the "Sleep of Ages."

Relations
Maa-Kheru strive to be accepted by the other races who they would willingly serve, but so often receive rejection that most Maa-Kheru have a standoffish attitude. Used to being scorned, Maa-Kheru defend themselves, not letting any save their own kind get close to them. It has been said that winning the favor of a Maa-Kheru is harder than wrestling crocodiles; however, who wins a Maa-Kheru as his friend is guaranteed a devoted companion for life. Given their long lives, Maa-Kheru often serve as tomb guardians and caretakers for their closest friends. Maa-Kheru deeply appreciate those who take good care of the dead. In many ways, they see eye to eye with the Anpur (Gnolls).

Alignment
The Maa-Kheru tends towards leading a lawful life, typically lawful neutral or lawful good. However, those who do embrace evil are among the worst villains known. Chaotic Maa-Kheru are often those who felt down-trodden by society and seek personal freedom.

Maa-Kheru Lands
Over the ages, some of the Maa-Kheru migrated from Antekh to form small enclaves of their own. In truth, their numbers are too small to be anything more than a minority in even in Antekh, their birthplace. Some consider their true home to be the Underworld, as the Asari (Halflings) do, and seek a way to return. These Maa-Kheru are known as the “Ungrateful” by their fellows, for they believe they were deceived by Neith and that this life is actually punishment for failing judgment in the Underworld. The Ungrateful seek a way to sneak or force their way through the Underworld into the heaven they feel was denied them by being awakened. This minority is based in Nedj-Akhet, and they welcome any of their kind who espouse similar views; all others are turned away, by force if necessary.

Religion
As a race, the Maa-Kheru worship Neith. Some do turn their backs on her, typically the “Ungrateful” but such rejection is rare as the Maa-Kheru need the sacred linens of Neith to heal and renew themselves. Occasionally, other gods are worshipped in addition to Neith, particularly gods of death such as Osiris, Nephythys, and Selqet. As a group, the four sons of Horus (Amset, Duamatef, Hapi, and Qebsenuef) are often revered. Anubis is rarely worshipped, and is actually proscribed due to some ancient pact with the Anpur (Gnolls). A Maa-Kheru worshipping Anubis can only receive up to 3rd level spells and will be actively hunted by Anpur aware of the breach.

Language
In addition to speaking Common, most Maa-Kheru learn a couple additional languages, often Halfling and Gnoll, to communicate with those who have a close bond to death.

Maa-Kheru Names
When a Maa-Kheru is named, he or she often receives the name of one of original undead awoken by Neith or of a deceased member of their family. Given their subtle belief in reincarnation, Maa-Kheru treat their names with the utmost reverence; to speak badly of their names is to dishonor countless before them who bore the same name. There is little difference in naming males and females, though females are often receive the “nth” ending to their names, signifying their connection to Neith.
Common Unliving Names: Hetep-mes (“Born of peace”), Mes-sep (“Gives birth to peace”), Utch-re (“Strong of voice”), Khesef-harash (“Great in speech”), Sere-sra (“Lifting up his/her face”), Besma-emker (“Flame seeing in the night”)

Adventurers
Stemming from their deep sense of stewardship over the other races, Maa-Kheru living in the city typically take to the adventuring life if a beloved friend does. Often, Maa-Kheru will follow where the living fear to tread. Independent Maa-Kheru also tend to become adventurers if they’re outcasts, typically becoming wildwalkers. Many become ghaffir, swearing to protect the tombs of their allies once they have fallen.

Feats
The Maa-Kheru have access to four feats which are largely unavailable to other races. These feats are channel negative energy, commanding touch, feign death, and ungrateful one; they are described under in “Feats of the Oasis.”

Favored Class: Cleric

 

[Quickleaf]

Not much of a limitation if they get free holy water.
They won't be able to travel far from their oasis. Not good adventurer material.

Adventurers outside of the region are rare. Most Maa-Kheru never leave the oasis, and PCs represent those who have both the courage and the means to travel.

That's an expensive potion of cure light wounds!
Why so expensive? An oil of gentle repose would only cost 300gp.

Good point, the price was too high. I'll adjust it to 300 gp.

Weird. So the player has to make a 'bluff DM' skill check to use this for healing?

I was looking for a way to prevent a player from abusing this feat (such as a cleric controlling undead and forcing them to use their drain ability on him so he could use this feat in the hopes of healing damage). I will omit the last sentence, and brainstorm better language...

Is it supposed to be a 'heal maa-kheru' spell that can do other things? Not worth the effort of researching. There are plenty of more efficient anti-undead spells, and why not use neutralise poison or remove disease for maa-kheru?

The thinking behind "scouring sands" was originally a way to hide evidence. Then I thought of the application for Maa-Kheru as an afterthought. I think the reason one would research it would be to decay a ceiling underneath your enemy's feet, or setting a covered pit trap, or hiding evidence of a caravan raid, etc. A Maa-kheru also benefits from its cleansing power, as a side effect.

Overall, I think the race is silly (yet another not-really-undead race);?

I don't know about other quasi-undead races, so I can't speak to that. Which races were you thinking of?

they can't really adventure (need to stay at their holy oasis), need allies who know their ways (gifts of neith), can't heal, etc.
What is your purpose for creating them?

Thanks for your tough questions, Geoff! My purpose in creating them was twofold: (1) In the campaign world, they are a marginalized minority, their numbers about 1300 in the main city, and 900 in the Ungrateful village. In many ways they are bound to the sacred oasis. They struggle, like a dog, to gain acceptance, and wear heavy cloaks to hide their frightening faces in hopes of fitting in. Some are bitter and resigned about their poor treatment and prey upon the other races, furthering the evil sterotype that hangs over the race. Yet, all are dependent upon kind (or manipulative) oasis-people to be wrapped in their sacred linens. (2) A Maa-Kheru can take damage that would kill others, and be back on their feet in a day. This allows the player to take greater risks. However, it requires a strong tie to the rest of the party; after all, you'll need to get access to holy water regularly and need to be wrapped in sacred linens at night. And when it comes to facing undead, the Maa-Kheru are tough opponents (I even considered giving them a fear-type ability which applied to undead).

PS: Is the Gifts of Neith anything to do with Edena of Neith?

No relation to Edena of Neith. Neith is an egyptian goddess of hunting, wisdom in battle, fair judgment, and guardian of the dead.

Bless Water requires 25gp of components. No non-adventurer would be able to afford 50gp/day, even if had a suitable cleric handy. A cleric level would be a must for these dudes.

In the campaign, bless water does not have this material component requirement. However, to make it integrate with this rule, I might design an alternate type of holy water (sacred water?) that is their sustenance source.

another thing is, if these must be wraped in special cloth, there needs to be an item description for such a thing, and what happens if it gets destroyed.

Thanks, Shogun! I will put that up here in a little bit.

theres one big-ass problem that dwarfs all... FIND ME A ING CLASS FOR THESE THINGS!!! there should be an experiance peanalty for taking cleric, because it's cheap, but the monk healing ability would be a waste of a class ability. all these things concidered, good job on the thinking outside the box.

Thanks for the compliment. Why do you think an experience penalty for taking the cleric class is justified? My instinct for their favored class is cleric or paladin. Not sure which one...

 

[Ulorian - Agent of Chaos]

Wow. Very imaginative.

I don't know if Paladin is a good choice for favoured class.. -4 to Charisma.

What happens if their sacred linens are destroyed? How can they acquire new ones?

 

[Li Shenron]

I like it very much. I only have two minor notes about it:

1) I think -4 to Charisma can be too much. It cuts out paladins, sorcerers and bards and also hampers clerics characters (maybe some of these were intended...). If you just wanted to represent bad reaction from other people towards this race, I'd suggest to give it -2 Charisma and a further -2 to Diplomacy/Intimidate/Bluff/Perform, or eventually all Cha-based skills. This way character interaction is even worse (net -3) but problems with cha-based spellcasting and other abilities (which don't have to do with character interaction) are lessened.

2) I don't completely get the point of +4 to Sense Motive vs feign death. Aren't they able to automatically know a creature's condition? If it replicates the spell Deathwatch I think it could be automatic, and no feign would help the target.

 

[Quickleaf]

See changes to first post!

Great advice, thanks!

I made it -2 CHA (not -4), and imposed a -2 penalty to Diplomacy, Gather Info, and Perform. However, it got a new special ability granting it +1 turn, control, and banish demons/ghost and +2 intimidate against such creatures.

Also, reworked gifts of Neith so that the creature returns to life as long as its body is intact and (mostly) whole. However, each time it is revived it takes 1 Constitution damage.

Removed nonsense writing about +4 sense so-and-so feigning death. (it was redundant)

Favored class is cleric.

I more clearly realized the race's concept just now too... The Maa-Kheru have recycled souls that have already been judged but are cursed in this cycle of rebirth until completing a certain task. Gee thanks!

 

[Quickleaf]

What happens if their sacred linens are destroyed? How can they acquire new ones?

I'm having brain freeze. I was just thinking something like mummy wrappings that had a blessing offered over them (by anyone, not necessarily a cleric) and soaked in oiled fragrances...easy enough to replace, but not something everyone just happens to carry around with them. Of course, there is the possibility for magic wrappings...

Have any ideas??

 

[jaker2003]

Magic Wrappings

Maybe you could have some "Blessed Wrappings" that the adventurers could carry around. They could wrap the corpses of those who died at the hands
(or claws) of undead in them. The wrappings would act as a hallow spell and prevent the corpse from rising as any form of undead while wrapped. And perhaps the Maa-Kheru could benefit from a +2 bonus to Charisma score while wearing it and recover 1hp/hour while carrying/wearing it. just an idea.