Journal of the Traveling Gnome

[JesterPoet]

WARNING! There be spoilers ahead! If you are visiting the SUNLESS CITADEL, consider yourself properly warned.

Wednesday, 02/07
Today is the day I take my leave of SilverMeadow, the village I have called home for the first half of my quiet life.

I leave with some regrets, as there are many friends and close relatives I leave behind, but I know I must follow my destiny, I must have success associated with my name.

Many long years I have spent in this quiet village, studying and practicing. It became apparent to me at an early age that my family guessed that I would follow my fantastic abilities with the shaping of gems to bring me fame and fortune. Yet, while I do love the craft, I long for something more. I long for a taste of the adventure that my grandfather, Bagzar Bladebender Silverforge Treewhistler Striding Donkey, found so many years ago.

So today I say goodbye to my family and friends. I shall don my travelling cap and throw caution to the wind. Today the road is my path. And I, Papram Gemslicer Orangepants Pagefinder, see no end to my road.

 

[JesterPoet]

Friday, 04/18
Much time has passed since my last entry. The road has been difficult, but dull. I have yet to be beset upon by bandits. Even a goblin or kobold fiend would be welcome at this point.
I must say, I met some interesting humans at the last town I visited. Certainly a strange bunch of people. Very depressing to be perfectly honest.

I have noticed that many of the other races I meet have trouble remembering my names. It seems that, if I stick to two or three names, it is much easier for them to call me by something I recognize. I feel that Dalfast Sorefoot seems to work for now, and have been using this name for a couple of days.

Lumpy isn't taking particularly well to the road. We did pass by a marshy pond a few days ago, and that seemed to perk him up. He's been spending quite a bit of time in my bag, though, as the travelling is long and he tires rather easily. Nonetheless, I am certainly happy to have the company.

I have heard that the city of Oakhurst is only a few weeks travel ahead, and that I may find other travellers there. I can only hope for the best. It would be a shame to die of boredom.

 

[JesterPoet]

Monday, 05/08
At last I have come to Oakhurst, though it is not the thriving city I was expecting it to be. I must say, however, that it has not been a total disappointment.
I was surprised to find that people in Oakhurst have very strange habits. I stopped by the Inn for my morning drink, and found it was completely empty! Just myself and the Inkeeper, and it was nearly 9:30 in the morning! I decided to read, and wait for more people to arrive, thinking that there might have been festivities in the city until late last night, but was not joined by anyone until nearly 11:00 when an elf (a traveller like myself) wandered into the bar.

He grabbed a water and joined me. The elf (Ian, as he calls himself) turned out to be quite friendly and rather talkative. I was unable to ascertain where he might be travelling to, or what he was doing in Oakhurst, but I wasn't overly intererested either, so this did not prove to be a problem.

After a while, a man came in complaining of Goblin trouble. It turns out the foolish people of this town have been dealing with the goblins, buying some sort of magic fruit from them a couple times a year. I could not help but try to correct this poor fellow, explaining to him that goblins are shifty little buggers, never to be trusted, but he insisted he needed this fruit.

As it turns out, the fruit did as was expected and healed his wife of some ailment from which she was suffering. Quite surprising, considering that the fruit came from one of the foulest creatures ever created. I can certainly say that nobody in my village would ever take anything from a goblin! Nonetheless, this man's problem was that he planted the seeds from the fruit, and managed to grow a small tree which was stolen from him before it could bear fruit.

This, however, was not a new problem. It seems that many people in Oakhurst have had the same thing happen to them. They all blame it on the goblins, which I do not doubt they are correct in doing. Yet they seemed unable to accept my suggestion that this was their fault in the first place, as one should never do business with a goblin. The man just continued to grumble about his plight at the bar.

A short time later, a HUGE fellow came into the bar. He was human, as far as I can tell, but much bigger than I have ever seen. I was most definitely intimidated by him at first, but soon found out that he was the only other fellow in town with a proper drinking schedule. He joined me in a mug of ale, as well as a mug of some vile liquid, the name of which I cannot even pronounce. The people in the bar seemed surprised at my ability to drink it. While I don't quite understand why, it was certainly a noteworthy accomplishment on my part.

Yet again, in the early afternoon, we were joined by another traveller...

 

[JesterPoet]

Yet again, in the early afternoon, we were joined by another traveller.
I can definitely say that the arrival of another gnome into the bar was not the highlight of my day. She was a priest, who brought news that she had just arrived in town and had been talking to the merchant, eventually discovering that this merchant's children had gone into an old ruin named The Sunless Citadel, and had never returned.

Though the arrival of a gnome was not the best news I had recieved in a long time, her news of lost sons in a ruined citadel filled with goblins was certainly interesting. Figuring this could be the start of a grand adventure, I convinced my elf friend Ian to accompany me to the merchant to find out more.

Upon arriving at the merchant, Ian discovered that she was willing to pay for the return of her children. He seemed a bit dishonest to me, spinning a tale of the seven dwarf fighters who would accompany us into the ruins. Then he ran off for a bit, and returned with a story that the seven dwarf fighters had continued on and that four of us would be venturing into the citadel together. At this point I found it difficult to maintain a straight face and excused myself. I can only guess what terms he came to with the merchant woman.

By the time I returned to the inn, Ian was already there telling Bamf (or Gigantor, as I like to call him) and the female gnome that we would be venturing into the citadel to bring back the lost children, or, at the very least, what was left of them.

Being that we had a long day ahead, I decided to retire and suggested the others do the same. As I headed upstairs to go to sleep (in a room the inkeeper generously provided free of charge) the people of Oakhurst began to come into the bar and drink. What kind of people drink after 5:00? I must say that I, Ramzap Swillswallower, will not be disappointed to leave this town!

 

[JesterPoet]

Tuesday, 06/08
It was bright and early (well, it was before 11:00) when we headed west of Oakhurst to find the sunless citadel. My companions felt it necessary to prepare themselves with a hearty breakfast before setting off. I, however, was ready for adventure and nearly too excited to eat!
We did not have to travel far before we came upon a ravine into which the Sunless Citadel had fallen. I gathered, from the writing on the pillars and stones nearby, that the foul goblins inhabiting this vile place did not want us, or anyone else for that matter, nearby.

As we traveled onward we came upon a knotted rope tied to a tree and descending into the ravine. Everyone moved over to it, and I warned my companions, “Use caution friends, for this may be a dangerous descent. Maybe we should consider other means” yet Ian insisted that he climb down the rope and into the dark below to be sure it was safe. That Ian is a brave soul there can be no doubt!

Gigantor, the priest-woman and I waited for Ian’s return but after a brief time we heard shouts coming from the chasm. Gigantor, who is apparently always ready for trouble, began a swift descent down the rope. I was not far behind, as I did not want my companions to get themselves in too much trouble, and I believe the priest-woman followed me almost immediately as well.

Unlike Gigantor, I took my time climbing down. By the time the priest and I arrived on the scene there was a grizzly sight to behold. There stood Gigantor, covered in blood and holding a large, dead rat on the end of what appeared to be two swords strung together, and Ian, unconscious or dead on the ground.

I made my way to the edge of the ledge we found ourselves on...

 

[JesterPoet]

I made my way to the edge of the ledge we found ourselves on, as there was little I could do with Ian, and little I wanted to do with Gigantor at this point. Upon closer inspection of the ledge we were on I found a set of stairs that descended farther down into the darkness.
When I returned to the group to make them aware of this, Ian was on his feet again, almost as though nothing had happened. He clearly didn’t want to talk about why he was unconscious when we got down there, so I did not press the issue.

Ian claimed he was up to the challenge of moving on, so we did. Gigantor led the way down the stairs into the chasm below. When we found the end of the stairs we were at what I can only assume was the entrance to this Sunless Citadel. Well, the people of Oakhurst certainly had the “Sunless” part right. It was incredibly dark. Even our torch didn’t provide nearly enough light.

As we headed for the entrance to this crumbling structure, Ian lost his footing and fell into a hole in the floor. This was our first sign that the whole structure probably was not particularly stable. We hoisted Ian out, and another large rat followed him out of the hole. Gigantor promptly skewered that rat on his sword-contraption however. I still have to wonder, however... Was that hole in the floor the result of the poor condition of the citadel, or was it a trap, placed intentionally by the foul creatures we may find inside. I certainly hope my first guess was the correct one.

Entering into the main hall of the citadel erased my hesitations. There were dead goblins all over the room. It was then that I realized what a fantastic adventure this would be. One goblin was pinned to the wall with a spear, and he was not long dead. Looking over his body, I actually found some gold! I can certainly use that!

We proceeded down a hallway in the back wall of the main hall. There were quite a few doors in this hallway, and the floor seemed to be pretty solid, so I am not as worried about traps as I was. It does make sense that the floor of a citadel that fell into a chasm would be a little flimsy in some spots. There were three doors off this hallway, so we opened one of them and simply found an empty room. I refused to let this dishearten me however, and I looked across the hall at another door. This door was made of stone and had ornate carvings on it. It was locked, however.

Ian claimed that he could get the locked door open, and I was not about to keep him from trying. In case this was an ambush from the goblins, however (which they are certainly known for) I ran down the hall and pulled the spear from the goblin stuck against the wall. I had Gigantor use the spear to prop the door open so our means of escape could not be cut off, and then told Ian to go ahead and open the door.

Ian, unfortunately, was unable to make the lock work. I suggested that it might be easier with specific tools for the job, but he just grumbled something about tools being expensive. I decided to leave the issue alone at that point.

When Ian finally got fed up with the lock we decided to try the other door at the end of the hallway. Gigantor pushed the door open and we found this room to be far from empty. There had apparently been prisoners in this room at one point as there was a large cage with a hole in it. The room also contained a fire pit and a bedroll. We heard whimpering coming from behind the bed, and went to investigate. There we found a filthy little kobold whimpering unintelligibly. I definitely hate goblins more than anything, but I don’t like kobolds much more.

Gigantor picked the kobold up and we searched him for weapons...

 

[JesterPoet]

Gigantor picked the kobold up and we searched him for weapons since he wasn’t putting up much of a fight. We asked him what he was doing, but he just whimpered so Gigantor got tired of him and tossed him in the cage. The kobold, upon having been set free, ran into an adjacent room. A few seconds later quite a few more kobolds emerged from the room. Gigantor and the priest dispatched them rather quickly and we went into the room they came out of, where we found that same kobold whimpering in the corner.
Well, I’d had it with this little bastard and I am sure everyone else had too. I chose not to suggest that Gigantor stay his hand, and let him put an end to the miserable beast. I, Cyrapel Koboldsbane Goblinslayer, have no patience for such creatures.

Ian is worn out, as am I, so we have decided to rest a while in this room. I am sure we will adventure a bit more, though it must be getting close to nightfall. It is so hard to tell within these darkened underground halls.

 

[JesterPoet]

06/08 continues...
It looks as though we’re not going to rest, however. The group has decided to press on a bit farther. I guess speed is important, as the people we’re looking for could still be alive down here. Such is the way of things.

Gigantor, being the genius that he is, started opening doors as soon as we set off. The first door he opened up closed off a room that was swarming with rats.

“I’m gonna kill some,” he said, stepping over the little ledge keeping the rats in the room.

From the other room we all called to him to come out of there. None of us felt like wading through a sea of rats to try to pull him out, so we just kept shouting, to which he replied “There has to be something in here.”

“Yeah, there is something. Rats,” I said.

Finally he decided to come out, just as the damned rats chewed their way through the little wall holding them in. In a matter of seconds we were infested by vermin. I managed to quickly skewer mine on my dagger, and we dispatched the others relatively quickly. Needless to say, though, I am not particularly thrilled that I had rats crawling all over me.

After we took care of the rats, we headed off into another corridor. This connected to what looked like the main hall of the citadel. Gigantor, as astute as ever, bounded off into the hallway where he was greeted by three kobolds. He ran up to engage them shouting “Guys, kobolds!”

The priest and I looked at each other and shook our heads. I'm beginning to like her. I wish I knew what her name was.

The kobolds had him covered on all sides. It wasn’t a pretty sight. Gigantor was trying his best to cut through them, but it was obvious he needed my help. Luckily, I saw a clear shot on the opposite side of the corridor, so I made for the far wall and lined up my crossbow. I had the little bastard in my sights, and all the sudden I could see nothing but elf butt in my face.

I briefly considered shooting anyway, but instead chose to shout, “What the hell are you doing?” to the insane rogue who was too cheap to buy lockpicks and too loud to avoid some rats.

“I’ve got the perfect shot” he responded.

“What the hell do you think I had?” I shouted at him. “Get the hell out of my way.”

He jumped back across the corridor on his long legs, but by the time my vision wasn’t obscured by elf read-end, the human had dispatched the kobolds that were surrounding him and more had come.

Just then I heard a scream from across the hall and looked to see Ian not blocking anyone’s view anymore as he crumpled to the floor with a crossbow bolt in his chest...

 

[JesterPoet]

Just then I heard a scream from across the hall and looked to see Ian not blocking anyone’s view anymore as he crumpled to the floor with a crossbow bolt in his chest.

The cleric and I looked at Ian and looked at each other. I could see what she was thinking so I yelled, “I’m on it Priest” and started moving to cover Ian. She looked relieved and headed over to Gigantor to clean up the new batch of scum that entered the hall.

After a brief incantation, I managed to cover the front of me with a magical shield. I knew it wouldn’t last long, so I used the opportunity to see to Ian’s wounds. He was bleeding pretty badly, but I managed to put on enough pressure with a bandage to stop the bleeding. Luckily, he was out cold so I didn’t have to worry about him standing up in front of me as I attempted to kill off the remaining kobolds.

Somehow one of the little bastards showed up behind us as well, so I had a kobold on either side of us with a crossbow. Funny how the elf can’t be in my way when I need him to. Nonetheless, I moved the shield around to my back side and opened fire on the kobold in front of me. As I did, I heard Gigantor fall to the floor.

The priest looked at me. “This one’s mine” she shouted, and in a few seconds, the human was on his feet again.

Someone is always trying to show me up...

Just as I fired on my target, however, another kobold in flowing red robes stepped out of a room in the back of the hall. I could certainly tell no good would come of this. I noticed, as she walked towards us, that she was muttering something. I looked over to Gigantor and saw him swaying on his feet.

“Bamf, resist the evil temptress!” I shouted at him. I realize now that this was a bit melodramatic, but you know how it is in the heat of the moment. Nonetheless, he seemed unable to resist, so I felt it was time for drastic measures. As the priest attacked the kobold nearest her, I shouted out the words “Enchantus Dorminus Nocti” and watched two of the kobolds with crossbows and the sorceress fall to the floor in a deep slumber.

As the sorceress fell to the floor, Gigantor came to. He and the priest became kobold killing machines. I felled the one I was firing at and turned my attention to the one behind me. As the last kobolds behind me were finished off, I exchanged crossbow fire with the coward who was trying to shoot me in the back. I fired off many bolts without hitting him, clearly because I wanted to scare him before finishing him off, not bevause I, Zapfazzle Koboldslayer Goblinsbane Elfcurser couldn't hit him. But in the end, he was slain with the rest. Probably by me. I can't really remember.

Some of the kobolds had silver in their pockets, which was a lucky thing, as we can certainly use the money. We took what the kobolds had on them, and pulled Ian into a room we cleared out earlier. After the preist tended to his wounds, we finally decided to catch up on our much needed rest.

 

[JesterPoet]

06/09
The night passed without a problem. Ian seemed better in the morning when we woke him up, which is good, because he really looked like he needed rest. We decided to get another early start so we headed back to check out the room that vile sorceress came from.

In the room we found three kobold guards who for some reason chose not to leave the room the night before. They seemed somewhat annoyed that we had killed the sorceress. I felt they just needed a good talking to:

“Hey, can’t we just talk this out?” I said.

“You kill wise one, you die now” one of them spat at me in broken common.

“What say you just leave and then we won’t have to kill you?” I replied

“You die” it spat at me. Clearly they weren’t conversationalists. The kobolds charged us with a fervor they obviously didn’t feel yesterday when we were KILLING THEIR SORCERESS. Gigantor took care of them relatively quickly. This batch didn’t even manage to knock out Ian. Not exactly up to snuff as far as guards go in my book.

In the room we found a few things of interest. Gigantor took a surprising interest to a feather that was on an altar in the room. That was an amusing sight. There was a vial of pink liquid that I could not identify, but with more study I might be able to, so I slipped it in my pack. I found a few scrolls as well that will be of use when I have time to study them. The human also managed to pull a key out of a makeshift throne and we took that with us as well.

Next we came into a room that had all sorts of rotting meat on hooks. Lumpy was not pleased at all with the room, so I avoided it altogether (I don’t think Lumpy is too keen on rats, he says they like to eat toads), but the elf decided to check it out. He came out relatively quickly, reeking of rotting meat. Wonderful...

Ian went and listened at a couple of other doors in the hall, proving useful for a short period of time. He heard sound at a couple of the doors. We decided to go into one of them. The door was locked an barred, but after lifting the bar, Gigantor managed to kick the door in. Not necessarily the approach I would have taken not knowing what was on the other side, but it proved effective.