If I were in your situation, I would start from the Great Wheel and make some changes to accomodate your requirements. Since you don't seem to want this, I'll give a shot at adapting the cosmology I used a long time ago for my OD&D games. The basis is that the Material, composed of elemental matter, is at the center of creation, surrounded by the Ethereal, which is surrounded by the Elemental planes. The Ethereal is a sort of black hole which pulls matter from the Elemental planes into itself, thus creating the Material. Beyond these lie (at the same metaphysical "distance" in opposite "directions") the plane of the celestial realms and the plane of the nether realms. They are largely composed of elemental matter, but not only - they are also made of faith, belief, good and evil. As a result, mortals cannot perceive these realms entirely, but they could get around well enough if they got there (a bit like looking at the 2d image of a 3d object). Beyond
these are uncountable Abstract Planes, the vast majority of which lack the complexity required to be of any use (for example, lots of abstract planes consist of an infinite geometric plane and nothing else; many more are just void). The few abstracts that have any sort of complexity are always extremely alien, being entirely composed of non-elemental substance. Perceptions struggle to project them into something a brain can understand; even gods are uneasy here. Certainly though, whatever lives here would feel just as bad on the material plane. The Astral is simply where you are if you are not on any plane. You are on the Astral while traveling between planes, for example (or while teleporting, or while dying, or while being resurrected).
glass said:
1) to retain the possibility of meeting gods (in their true forms)
2) to retain the possibility of meeting fiends in their own realms
This seriously contrasts with #9. In any case, in the cosmology described above, I ruled that it was practically impossible to enter either the celestial realms or the nether realms unless the local powers allowed you to do so (what, back then, passed for epic magic could do so though). I can see fiends doing so on a regular basis, to capture, corrupt and torment visitors.
3) to include some concept of the soul journeying to somewhere
4) to make ghosts make sense
Tie a stone to a rope and spin it very fast; your soul is the stone, your hand is the material plane, and the rope is the body. Picture the rope snapping. See what happens. The soul is literally flung into the Astral; depending on its faith, beliefs, goodness or evilness, it is drawn towards either the celestial realms or the nether realms as if by gravity (it doesn't go towards the elemental planes; being a soul it is unrelated to matter and not pulled towards it). Once there, since it is on plane not limited to elemental matter, its faith, beliefs etc actually take up a physical form. Incorporeal undead can happen for a number of reasons; according to what exactly happened, you'll end up with a different type of undead. Sometimes the soul isn't caught by either of the afterlife planes, and it is lost in the Astral for some time before becoming self-conscious again. Sometimes the soul is refused entrance into the realm it was drawn to, for who knows what reason. Sometimes the soul simply doesn't leave the Material; this can happen if the dead has left some incredibly important unfinished business, so important that its pull is stronger than the one of the afterlife planes. Sometimes the soul simply gets stuck in the Ethereal.
5) to include planes of mirrors and the maybe far realm (just because I think they are cool).
Check. They are Abstract Planes. Because of the gods' ban, the afterlives can't really be visited, but these are accessible. Being very far, it takes powerful magic, though.
6) spells still working more or less as normal (speak with dead, resurrection, reincarnation, teleport)
The soul's voyage strips most of its memories from it. These memories are left on the Astral. Any kind of resurrection magic does its best to find them and reattach them to the soul as it gets back, but that's no easy task so you usually end up with one less level. Speak with dead doesn't actually speak with the dead; it goes on the Astral, pulls together as much of the dead's memories as it can, and shakes the information out of them using the corpse as a way to manifest them. The whole construct also "remembers" a few traits of the soul which once kept it together, and might dislike the caster, so it may have right to a Will save. Teleport means getting on the Astral and then back on the Material (or whatever plane you were in) on a different point. Depending on the method you use to orient yourself in the Astral, and how far you can travel in there, you end up with different spells. Negative and positive energy effects aren't tied to any particular plane; they deal with a life energy which is something of a background radiation present everywhere, which pushes whatever stuff it can find (elemental matter, metaphysical matter, abstract matter, whatever) to organize itself in lifeforms (though most abstract planes are just too simple for any sort of life).
7) somewhere for celestial & fiendish animals, and elementals to come from
Celestial and fiendish creatures are created by the powers of the celestial and nether realms in imitation of Material life. As planar creatures, they are partially composed of metaphysical matter, which explains their traits. Elementals are native lifeforms of the elemental planes.
8) the ability to accommodate theological and metaphysical beliefs of different cultures
Both the Celestial Plane and the Nether Plane are infinite in size, and have infinite regions or "realms". Each realm has different characteristics.
9) living mortals wandering around in the afterlife.
Not unless someone wants them to.
10) the whole daemon/devil/demon/demodand divide.
You can organize the celestial and infernal hierarchies however you want.
11) vast numbers of outer planes.
4 elemental planes, the ethereal, the astral, 2 arbitrarily complex outer planes. And a vast number of abstract planes, but only very few are significant.
That's almost exactly what I played with back in the days; there were demons and elementals and gods and whatever, but the characters hardly ever travelled the planes (save for the ethereal and astral, but that's easy, they are the closest).