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Memorable Phrases uttered by PCs
- Thread starter KenSeg
- Start date
My favorite from an NPC...
The DM was giving a welcoming speech (half scripted, half winging it) from the mouth of a tribal Chieftan that went something like:
"Welcome, we are but a modest tribe of hunter-gatherers...well...not so much hunters as gatherers...we're more gatherers than hunters..."
and I interrupted, popping my notepad with my hand & mimicking the voice he used for the Chief:
"Who wrote this speech? He's a hack! I want his head on a spear!"
Laughter ensued.
The DM was giving a welcoming speech (half scripted, half winging it) from the mouth of a tribal Chieftan that went something like:
"Welcome, we are but a modest tribe of hunter-gatherers...well...not so much hunters as gatherers...we're more gatherers than hunters..."
and I interrupted, popping my notepad with my hand & mimicking the voice he used for the Chief:
"Who wrote this speech? He's a hack! I want his head on a spear!"
Laughter ensued.
That.
Rocks.
From a 2Ed campaign that would be Epic today...
My Druid/Rgr/MU: "Why in the...why did you take this freakin' sphere from the 2 demons? They've been attacking us for months now."
His Wiz: "Well, I was just wandering through the Abyss and I saw 2 demon princes fighting over it...I figured if they were fighting over it, it was better that I have it than them."
My Druid/Rgr/MU: "Why in the...why did you take this freakin' sphere from the 2 demons? They've been attacking us for months now."
His Wiz: "Well, I was just wandering through the Abyss and I saw 2 demon princes fighting over it...I figured if they were fighting over it, it was better that I have it than them."
Kae'Yoss
First Post
"Blood preasure, boss" (said to a raging barbarian/cleric)
Solar-Turned-Evil: "Your path ends here, you will never pass me, but pass on you will" (or something like this)
Our Dwarf Wizard: "Oh yeah? Let's roshambo it!" (followed by some maximized, empowered meteor swarm that downed the fallen angel instantly)
Some PC: "Does anyone have a magic weapon to hurt that thing?"
Drow Priest: "I have a +1 Handbrake"
Everyone else: "???"
Drow Priest: "Uh, I mean hand crossbow"
Evil Wizard: "Yes, you can kill me, but then you'll never get the information you seek so desperately and which only I have."
Psion (in matter-of-fact voice): "We have a cleric. She can speak to the dead."
Priestess: "I'll take the sorcerer's spear and put it into any hole I can find."
Sorcerer: "
.... you know what? Why don't you keep that spear? I'll get another"
Priestess: "Your mother" (that was the cue for the rest of us to close our eyes while the priestess cast that nymph spell that makes people blind. The player thought this was hilarious)
BBEG: "Yes, it is I who killed your kind. Not me personally, of course, I have my henchmen for that. This creature beside me, for example, has plenty of notches in his axe, although he doesn't have an axe."
Our bladesinger: "Oooh, captain eloquent."
Solar-Turned-Evil: "Your path ends here, you will never pass me, but pass on you will" (or something like this)
Our Dwarf Wizard: "Oh yeah? Let's roshambo it!" (followed by some maximized, empowered meteor swarm that downed the fallen angel instantly)
Some PC: "Does anyone have a magic weapon to hurt that thing?"
Drow Priest: "I have a +1 Handbrake"
Everyone else: "???"
Drow Priest: "Uh, I mean hand crossbow"
Evil Wizard: "Yes, you can kill me, but then you'll never get the information you seek so desperately and which only I have."
Psion (in matter-of-fact voice): "We have a cleric. She can speak to the dead."
Priestess: "I'll take the sorcerer's spear and put it into any hole I can find."
Sorcerer: "
.... you know what? Why don't you keep that spear? I'll get another"Priestess: "Your mother" (that was the cue for the rest of us to close our eyes while the priestess cast that nymph spell that makes people blind. The player thought this was hilarious)
BBEG: "Yes, it is I who killed your kind. Not me personally, of course, I have my henchmen for that. This creature beside me, for example, has plenty of notches in his axe, although he doesn't have an axe."
Our bladesinger: "Oooh, captain eloquent."
Okay I have a few more:
A PC playing a Gnome comes in riding his dog. Another PC asks "What is that??? A dire-Chihuahua??"
-----
Arleth (Rogue): I really don't want to face a zombie-dog.
Ragineau (Ranger): It could be a baby unicorn...
Arleth: If you think there's something tht a needs to be saved, you can go in and we'll cover you.
-----
Tebryn (Ranger): Um...we need more offensive spells!!!
Eam (Sorcerer): Oh, I'm plenty offensive.
Tebryn: Yes you are, but we need spells right now!!
-----
Tebryn (Ranger): Ok stalwart companions....and Eam...
-----
Talmir (The King's Herald) whispering to the PCs: I know that you just saved the kingdom and all, but you still have to bow to his majesty the King.
PCs: .....long unblinking stares.....
That's it for now.
A PC playing a Gnome comes in riding his dog. Another PC asks "What is that??? A dire-Chihuahua??"
-----
Arleth (Rogue): I really don't want to face a zombie-dog.
Ragineau (Ranger): It could be a baby unicorn...
Arleth: If you think there's something tht a needs to be saved, you can go in and we'll cover you.
-----
Tebryn (Ranger): Um...we need more offensive spells!!!
Eam (Sorcerer): Oh, I'm plenty offensive.
Tebryn: Yes you are, but we need spells right now!!
-----
Tebryn (Ranger): Ok stalwart companions....and Eam...
-----
Talmir (The King's Herald) whispering to the PCs: I know that you just saved the kingdom and all, but you still have to bow to his majesty the King.
PCs: .....long unblinking stares.....
That's it for now.
cmrscorpio
Explorer
The quote that causes me to swell in pride as a DM, has a *long* backstory to it, and yet can easily be appreciated out of context:
"DON'T TRUST THE PALADIN!"
"DON'T TRUST THE PALADIN!"
Ry
Explorer
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