5E Mournlands Immigration Bureau

The Glen

Adventurer
I understand that you're looking to relocate a group to our lands?

Yes, I represent a group of people looking to immigrate to a realm that can provide us a safer home than our previous one.

And I understand you've got a region picked out to migrate to? Am I reading this correctly?

Yes, we were hoping to move into the former nation of Cyre.

You want to move into Cyre? You actually want to live in the Mournlands?

We understand that's it's available and can house large numbers of people.

It's also filled with ravening monsters and a psychotic warforged that hates all life.

But how many times have the monsters or the warforged tried to destroy the world?

None that I know of, but still...

Have they tried to drag any other locations to hell?

I don't think that's in their power.

What about summoning demon lords to destroy the world?

Again, that's outside their scope of abilities.

Unleash a dragon queen that wants to ravage the world?

Not to my knowledge.

Send armies of giants that will ravage the countryside to appease their gods?

There aren't any giants in the Mournlands.

Flood the world with elemental evils?

Now you're just being silly.

Eat all the souls in the world?

That's not even possible.

So you're saying the worst they can do is kill people. Not eat our souls, drag the world to hell, unleash dragons, demons, giants, elementals or any other nasties on the world?

No. But they will try to eat you.

Can they be killed?

Yes, but it's not easy.

But if we had, say adventurers to put them down, then that would remove the biggest obstacle to living in the Mournlands.

There's other problems, like a lack of natural healing.

But can't we just move the ill to the lands that provide healing in case of an emergency?

I suppose that's possible.

I don't understand why you're looking to relocate to the Mournlands from, where did you say you were from again?

The Savage Coast.

And you think that moving to the Mournlands is safer for you?

All those scenarios I just mentioned? All that happened in just the last five years. We're looking for someplace a little safer to raise our children. So we don't have to rely on adventurers every year for our survival, especially when they have to travel to exotic locales to prevent the yearly apocalypse from destroying us thousands of miles away.

Why here though?

Well, we asked the guild for a new place to live, we had hoped that with the recent talk about Saltmarsh that maybe Greyhawk would be available. We originally started moving into Ravenloft but the local lord stopped allowing immigrants after his nation reached capacity.

How many immigrated to Barovia?

Sixty-five million.

There has to be someplace better than the Mournlands though.

Sadly, no. Greyhawk hasn't opened up despite our hopes. Darokin in Mystara would be perfect but we haven't heard anything from that land in decades. It's the same with Sigil, Proudglaive, Palanthas, and Tyr. So we thought with Eberron opening its borders we might be able to help each other. We retake the Mournlands and you don't have to worry about the monsters anymore. We have a new homeland that's not in danger of blowing up every twelve months.

I suppose that would be an option. I will have to ask the king for permission, but with some financial incentives that shouldn't be a problem. Just how many people are you looking at bringing over from Faerun to the Mournlands?

Just over 200 million.
 

gyor

Adventurer
The sad part is that is just a small part of what has been happening on the Swordcoast, it doesn't include the Spellplague, the Sundering, the Time of Troubles, the war with the Kingdom of Many Arrows, enemy agents Red Wizards to Najara to Aboleths) to the Rage of Dragons, to Bane, Bhaal, and Myrukl walking around. And in upcoming invasion by Mind Flayers of Baldur's Gate, who aren't even the main enemies of BG3, and that doesn't even include a mad mage under waterdeep.
 

Zardnaar

Hero
Lol reminds me of a Ravenloft vs Athas parody. Ravenloft nicer place to live than Athas.

Great thread though.
 

The Glen

Adventurer
The sad part is that is just a small part of what has been happening on the Swordcoast, it doesn't include the Spellplague, the Sundering, the Time of Troubles, the war with the Kingdom of Many Arrows, enemy agents Red Wizards to Najara to Aboleths) to the Rage of Dragons, to Bane, Bhaal, and Myrukl walking around. And in upcoming invasion by Mind Flayers of Baldur's Gate, who aren't even the main enemies of BG3, and that doesn't even include a mad mage under waterdeep.
I did a video talking about how TSR liked to nuke settings as establishing events like the Rain of Colorless Fire in Greyhawk or the Great Rain of Fire in Mystara. Forgotten Realms, on the other hand, had about a dozen events that qualified.
 

Zardnaar

Hero
I did a video talking about how TSR liked to nuke settings as establishing events like the Rain of Colorless Fire in Greyhawk or the Great Rain of Fire in Mystara. Forgotten Realms, on the other hand, had about a dozen events that qualified.
Every setting got nuked, TSR had more nukes than North Korea.
 

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