My last gaming session made me uncomfortable...

[VirgilCaine]

Unfortunately, a bar fight has not erupted yet, though it's still quite early in the encounter. I too was amazed that spells weren't cast or that steel wasn't drawn, I was quite expecting that. I was trying hard to make those within as "dirty-baggy" as was humanly possible. Normally, these two women don't put up with such foolishness, but from what I understand, they are trying to keep a low profile while in the place. Anyway, the game session ended soon after that, so we still don't have a resolution on it.

What was she thinking? "I'll wear this dress so no one will look at me"?

Low profile? Why not look like everyone else in the place--scars, armor, weapons, equipment, etc.?

But ANYWAY.
I see nothing wrong with what you said. I can see how a person could be uncomfortable, but you seem to have handled it well.

 

[Darth K'Trava]

This thread reminded me that none of the PCs in my game are virgins. All the PCs are male by the way.

Paladin(My PC): Raped by a female vampire
Dwarven Cleric: He one had to spend the night in a prison
Tiefling: Did it with a male shopkepper sp the party could get magic items
Mage: With a queen of a magical floating island in another dimension from the game world.

I think most of our characters, on the other hand, ARE virgins. Usually sex doesn't come up in the game much. if it does, it's usually between a husband/wife duo who seem to have their characters end up "in the sack" in practically every game.... All of my characters, male or female, have been virgins as I haven't dealt with that issue (the one time a character had "urges" towards a dragon-descendant npc, she tuned it out, focusing more on her duties and the fact that although she may LOOK like a half-dragon, she still THINKS as a human).

 

[Templetroll]

The worst I have come across was playing (as a DM) a female that was trying seduce a male PC. It got graphic at times and ever since I avoid that (at least with players that INSIST on roleplaying such things).

In your situation, I understand why you feel the way you do but it does seem everyone was okay with it.

If only because of my situation I described before, I now roll a dice and say a brief one liner and suggest intent. No direct descriptions or narriative.

I'll blush you know

The oddest encounter I had like that was a party (My wife and a couple who later married, I was their best man) met a wizard in a ruined city. He was arrogant, but charming (His name was Imperious Jorge and he lived up to the appellation] and they were friendly people. Jorge stood back and watched them battle an ogre; finding it most humorous.

He traveled with them back to town while flirting with one of the women in the party, a rogue named Genevieve, who used her feminine wiles to gain advantage. Back in town the wizard went shopping, met her later, romance ensued and the next day a murder victim was found. During the next week the romance went swimmingly and more deaths frightened the city. The party was investigating the matter, while the wizard was totally bored by it all and often absented himself when they went to the scenes of the brutal crimes. The victims were found to have been ripped to shreds and body parts 'missing'.

Another member of the party voiced a suspicion about the wizard. His paramour was disturbed but she admitted that the evidence was pointing that way. The player was trying to get to the bottom of it and she wanted more details of her encounters with Jorge. I described the fact that he seemed to be startlingly adroit lover and always seemed to know where and how to touch her! He had a copy of a Kama Sutra-type of book (his spellbook with really interesting Secret Pages!) and the player suggested a few pages the two of them tried. (o_0)

She knew he had a beard and was hairy chest and back and I described how even his hands felt 'furry' and his fingers reached places no lover had ever been able to before.... She, player and character, thought it was just really cool use of magic on his part and quite acceptable since it made her feel great. This was the part that was odd, trying to convey their relationship without having to be too graphic. The player seemed entertained by the descriptions and how I would blush sometimes during it.

Just to finish off the story... Then they got the idea that he was a werewolf. It fit the savagery of the murders and the slipping away.... She thought it was to keep from harming her and that was the sweetest thing and he really cared!!

However, for the sake of the town she put together a small silver chain bag with lead shot in it... a silver sap which she was proficient with. They deliberately took him to the latest scene of murder and as he gazed at the carnage, yawning, she smacked him on the back of the head! A good solid hit it was too. Jorge turned around and said to her, "This behavior is really going to put a crimp in our relationship."

the fighter sprinkled him with holy water. I said, "he's wet." They empasized how copiously they sprinkled Jorge. I told them, "He is very wet." They brought up how holy water should affect a werewolf and I agreed, it would do that and then went back to what was actually happening before them.

Jorge said, "You seek a werewolf?" then fell to all fours, changing into a wolf, and continued speaking, "... so be it." Later the players said that speaking while in full wolf form should have been a serious clue but they were caught up in the situation.

They had a marvelous fight running all over town with Jorge always turning away from where the town guards seemed to be and chattering at the woman the entire time telling her this was so unnecessary. The fighter kept up hitting the fellow, despite it never seeming to cause any wounds (the illusion about the wolf form covered it up). He refused to accept that his magic sword was useless.

The other party member did some great rolls to put a magical slave collar they had gotten from a monster's lair around the wolf's neck and it appeared to float about an inch away from the animal's neck all the way around. (!) It also did not have the expected charm effect on the creature.

Then, as they finally had the wolf down and Jorge said something nice about missing her as he died, turning into a humanoid with a tiger's head.

The players were shocked that I had run a rakshasa against them, asking why it hadn't peppered them with magic missiles and fireballs. I told them it was because he was imperious; he did not need to rely on such meager spells, he was skilled enough to survive on his wits and illusions.

The characters researched the creature and found out rakshasa were evil spirits that inhabited babies in the womb.... then his paramour found out she was pregnant... The campaign ended with her on a ship out of the country and involved in a relationship with a rich merchant.

 

[Algolei]

I think it's your PLAYERS who need the therapy......... :\ They're the ones who both stood by and did nothing and wanted the graphic details of a rape.... probably a good thing there weren't any women in your group.... all the guys woulda gotten whocked upside the head after that.

To be completely accurate, I didn't describe a rape, just the events leading up to the rape that they were supposed to be stopping. A very graphic beating, then a graphic description of a knife being used to disfigure a person in horrible ways. (I don't know if I could have described a rape with any detail and made it seem realistic. Beating and slashing, sure, but not rape.) (Don't wanna know what that says about me. :\ )

And I have punched each of those players in the back of the head over the years since then, which makes me feel a little better about the whole thing. Oops! No, I never punched Art in the back of the head! But I punched Don and Ed several times, so it amounts to about the same thing. 'Cause they sucked the most!

 

[Testament]

I think it's your PLAYERS who need the therapy......... :\ They're the ones who both stood by and did nothing and wanted the graphic details of a rape.... probably a good thing there weren't any women in your group.... all the guys woulda gotten whocked upside the head after that.

I'm with Darth K'Trava here, at that point I'd be declaring all the characters to be bordering on evil, if not already there.

I've had some uncomfortable moments in my game, usually the ones that were meant to be uncomfortable. To clarify, my PCs (before the TPK involving an Evil Artefact, a Blasphemy spell and a Bearded Devil) were fighting the good fight against the followers of an utterly evil Entity (pseudo-god in my setting) who considers rape and torture to be holy rites, the more innocent the victim, and the more brutal and degrading the whole affair is, the better. I don't think any of them will ever forget the image of a naked and bloodied 9 year old girl being thrown to a pack of hellhounds. What can I say, I expel my inner sociopath by creating the vilest villains I can manage.

It reached the point where the merest hint of a Zugashite would have the players ready to start decapitating, they'd grown to hate and despise them that much.

Its probably good to know when to stop though. A couple of my players went a bit white during the hellhound incident.

 

[moritheil]

Sometimes, the players really don't want to do anything.

I've only thrown out such a situation once ever - a city was in flames and being looted, and a PC walked into a building to find two men trying to restrain a woman who was screaming for help.

He was very creative in dismembering the offenders, taking special care to remind them that it is heinous.

Other PCs were a little unnerved by the intensity of it, but not greatly.

Yes. When the party failed to defend a rape victim from her attacker. It was the opening adventure hook, and my players decided to mess with my head. So they just watched. And kept asking me what was happening, and if anyone else was doing anything about it.

I tried to fight fire with fire by describing things in horrible detail. Like, then they'd HAVE to do something. It didn't exactly work. Ended up, we just put the game aside for the night and played Nintendo because the whole thing was soooooo bizarre and uncomfortable.

(I thought it was a great adventure hook! Who doesn't defend the defenseless maiden from her brutal attacker?!) Now all my adventure hooks involve cute little puppies with "send help!" notes....

*goes back into therapy*

 

[Algolei]

Some of my players don't understand the concept of alignments. They think they're like teams: Good and Evil do the same things, they're just on opposite sides.

I need to stop playing with sociopaths and go back to playing with real people again. Or maybe dolls.

...I expel my inner sociopath by creating the vilest villains I can manage.

I do that when I make chili. (Not a euphemism.)

 

[Shellman]

Nothing against female gamers at all, but no one in my group plays with them. We have all had bad experiences to some point.

Most of our issues come from someone playing with there wife or girlfriend, who always seems to get preferential treatment from there real world partner whether he is the DM or a player.

I would be open to playing with a female gamer as long as there real world partner is not in the game at all. Just my perspective

 

[Keeper of Secrets]

If this kind of thing bothered me or my players we'd never play again out of shame. That kind of activity and language comes all the time from my group and this is a superteam with several female players.

 

[Psychic Warrior]

I wouldn't worry about it overmuch. I would contact the player whose bosom you so kindly complimented and make it clear that you only meant to portray the ruffian who inhabited the Bloody Fist and that, to assuage your own gentlemanly discomfort with such behavior, you feel you must apologize for such words. Then, apologize, squeeze her boob, and run away.

Thanks - now I have a laugh-cough fit going!