Need some advice on player politics

[Xath]

I've seen similar situations to this, and they usually end well. I've found that most of the people who have problems with situations like this are one of two things.

1. They're "roll"players more than "role"players.
2. It sometimes turns out that the person complaining just feels (sometimes irrationally, granted) left out. If you make the effort to make their character feel integrated or special, they won't mind the other stuff.

 

[diaglo]

the only problem i see...

the player feels threatened that out of game politics will be played out in game.


example.. the party is arguing about where to go next. dwarf and human will agree 100% of the time. b/c wife and hubby will.

this means out of 5.. 40% will have a much higher say than any of the other players.

 

[frankthedm]

the only problem i see...

the player feels threatened that out of game politics will be played out in game.


example.. the party is arguing about where to go next. dwarf and human will agree 100% of the time. b/c wife and hubby will.

this means out of 5.. 40% will have a much higher say than any of the other players.

I agree with the player, that can be real *blanking* annoying when the love birds are playing 1 character with 2 sheets. When in game choices are made based on a OOC relationship, the game suffers. Unless the players in question have done similar things with non signifigant others, then i don't recomend allowing it.

Are dwarves that altruistic in your game?

Only other thing is, is there even a HINT of the objecting player liking the engaged girl? If so then there may be far worse problems down the road.

 

[The_Universe]

It's the DM's job to make those calls, not the player's. By their nature, every player has his or her own interest closest to heart. That's normal, and there's really nothing wrong with that.

If the couple is ridiculous with their relationships, if they're acting inappropriately at the table, etc. Then the DM has grounds to *ask* the players in questions to tone it down, or come up with other concepts.

If the guy just doesn't want to deal with romance in the game, and the DM is willing to tolerate it, the guy in question should pretty much suck it up - or at the very least come to the realization that everyone's going to get enjoyment out of things in a different way.

So, DM - is it inappropriate? Is it interfering? Are they inconsiderate to others?

If the answer to those questions is no, and *you're* comfortable with it, let it happen. It's the players game, but it's the DMs job to create and enforce the norms.

 

[Arnwyn]

I'd find out specifically and in detail what that one player's problem is, first.

 

[TheEvil]

Amusing enough, if his concern is that they will act as a single unit, then he may be disappointed to discover that, if they are so inclined, they will act this was even without an in-character reason. Conversely, my fiance' and I have gamed together for a couple years over 6 or 7 games. Our characters frequently disagree on what to do, and the one couple we did make (married dwarves) didn't even agree on everything. We have gotten kicked out of one game for player behavior where we probably should have taken a cold shower. On the other hand, the GM could have mentioned being bothered by our behavior rather then giving my fiance' the ultimatium for us to sit apart or leave the game. Meh.

Hijack aside, I find it quite odd he would object to couples having coupled characters. As others have suggested, he may have feelings for one of the couple. You mentioned that it being known they are engaged was a 'good thing', which suggests to me that there is something you are not telling us. Has this sort of situation come up for him in the past? Does he just not want romance in the game, or is he only applying it specificely to the couple? Have the couple had romantically involved characters in the past? Has it caused problems in the game? I can see several situations where he could have been burnt and is now a bit gunshy. I can also see several where his out of game issues are impinging on the game. Is there anything you can add to clarify things?

 

[Tom Cashel]

I'm an editor in real life, so all my characters are also editors. And since I'm friends with all the people in my gaming group, our characters are always the best of friends. Since I like ice cream, all of the characters I play do too. I'm a tall guy, so my characters are tall, with green/hazel eyes...just like me. I always play the alignment that matches most my own moral compass. If there were someone in the group I didn't like, their character would be the enemy of my character.

I could go on all day, so I'll stop.

The point being: are the above statements all that far removed from "Well, we're engaged in real life and we love each other...so all of our characters will also be engaged/related/joined in some way. Then we don't even have to pretend we're not engaged!"

Just playing devil's advocate here. Perhaps the other guy's preference isn't solely or necessarily due to a "nasty personality" (you don't even know him!). It could be due to prior experience, or a whole host of other reasons.

The idea about not infringing on other people's fun should work both ways.

 

[JustKim]

Just playing devil's advocate here. Perhaps the other guy's preference isn't solely or necessarily due to a "nasty personality" (you don't even know him!). It could be due to prior experience, or a whole host of other reasons.

This is an assumption I make based on other assumptions, of course I don't know him well enough to say that he has a nasty personality, but many people seem to be missing something. The player has (Or will have) a problem with the couple playing uncle and nephew. Everyone is discussing the validity of objecting to romantic relationships but the relationship in question is now completely non-romantic. Obviously the problem is deeper than a distaste for romantic PC relationships, and when I try to empathize what kind of person would have a problem with any and all PC relationships all I can come up with is someone who wants control to the point of being completely unreasonable.

 

[TheEvil]

Thus my request for more information. There really is too little here to go on, and what little there is sounds like bad attitude on the one guy's part.

I'd still like to know why it is a good thing that everyone knows they are engaged.

 

[Tom Cashel]

Everyone is discussing the validity of objecting to romantic relationships but the relationship in question is now completely non-romantic.

Romantic vs. non-romantic wasn't really the point of my post.

You see people complaining all the time about "one-trick pony" players who always play the same character in a slightly different guise. Why is it any different for two players to always be related, but in a slightly different relationship?

So to be more clear, I suppose...to me, a couple's insistence on always playing duos of "dependent" characters is just as creepy/annoying as a guy who wants to dictate other people's characters to them.