Newsflash from Gondor:

[Chauzu]

LOLOLOL!!!

 

[Bob Aberton]

LOL!!!!!!

 

[Ei]

Political commentary axed

 

[Mistwell]

Political commentary axed

 

[Azure Trance]

Okay, dead thread now...thanks for making this political by the way, instead of the joke it was!

He's new; I imagine he'll learn.

 

[krunchyfrogg]

UPDATE! Grima's side of the story...

Why We Must Avoid War with Mordor

Grima Wormtongue

New Gondor Times Opinion Editorial

There are many in Gondor who would counsel war with Mordor, pickers of bones, meddlers in other men's sorrows, carrion-fowl that grow fat on war. While wizards and enchanters like that Stormcrow Gandalf and the Sorceress of the Golden Wood conspire to stage a power struggle with the rightfull Lord of the Rings, they intend to use us as cannon fodder in their schemes to gain control of the One Ring of Power for themselves.

While none would deny that Sauron has committed evil acts, there was a time when Numenor took counsel with Morgoth. One must ask why was it acceptable for the wise to listen to the counsel of Morgoth who it seems was not a threat, yet they claim that Sauron must be eradicated. There are other dark forces in the Middle Earth today. Are we to pursue each and every dark power which wishes to rule Middle Earth and enslave all men and elves? If we did, we would be constantly enmeshed in fighting such wars. Furthermore Sauron's greatest atrocities are long behind him and he is even a force for stability in the region.

If Sauron is to be toppled, the result would be chaos as armies of Orcs, Wargs and Trolls would wage war on each other. Even now there have been reported clashes between Orc groups and this situation would only deteriorate further without Sauron to maintain order. If Sauron is gone, we would be obligated to keep that order ourselves, an enterprise which would tie up tens of thousands of troops and deplete our treasuries.

Even if we were to undertake such rash actions, we must also consider the Easterling and Haradrim street which would undoubtedly be outraged by the slaughter of tens of thousands of Orcs and might well choose to believe that this is a war against all those who allied themselves with Mordor. Thus a conflict with Mordor could spill over until we find ourselves fighting numerous wars on numerous fronts. Gondor is a great power but even Gondor cannot defeat all of Middle Earth.

It thus becomes quite clear that we cannot allow the schemes of Wizards contending for power to pull us into a conflict which can be avoided if we instead choose the way of peace. But where wise men like Saruman counsel peace, Gandalf Stormcrow calls for war bringing ill wherever he goes. It is hoped that Denethor and my lord Theoden will listen to the voices of the vast majority of the Men of Gondor and avoid a war that will bring untold horrors with it.

: Grima Wormtongue was a key adviser to Theoden son of Thengel and is currently residing in Orthanc.

 

[Piratecat]

I'm just deleting out Ei's and Mistwell's political commentary. Guys, think twice next time, please.

 

[Edena_of_Neith]

Since the Moderators are allowing this thread to remain open here, I wish to take it entirely into fantasy politics (that is, the politics of Gondor - not an analogy of our Real World situation, which is not permitted here on ENWorld)

A character known as the Wanderer (see the 3rd IR) shows up in Minas Tirith.
This character is an old, stooped over man with long white hair and a long white beard. His clothing is druidic, he carries a gnarled oaken staff, and when he speaks, his voice is sharp.

He comes to the Square of the White Tree, and with arcane gesturing forces the astonished Tower Guard aside.
He enters the Tower of Ecthelion, and none can stop him.
He looks upon the Dead Tree, and his face is stern and sad.
He beholds the Seat of the Stewards of Gondor, and beyond that the Throne of Gondor, empty since King Earnur foolishly went to challenge the Lord of the Nazgul at the gates of Minas Morgul.
He looks around, his gaze contemptuous and scoffing, at the wonders of Gondor Past.

Then, he proceeds to inform whoever is sitting on the Steward's Seat that he has 5 seconds to get off said seat.
Otherwise, both man and seat get vaporized. See?
5 ...
4 ...
3 ...
2 ...
1 ...

The Wanderer sneers as the usurper (probably some descendent of Castanamir that somehow was missed in the Fall of Umbar) runs for it, and his Guard (a pathetic shadow of the true Tower Guard) run off with him.

Then, the Wanderer demands that the officials of Minas Tirith convene in the Tower.
The Wanderer seats HIMSELF on the Seat of the Stewards, and HE takes up the Staff of the Stewards, smooth and white (and whenever he wishes to make a point, he bangs it quite forcefully on the floor, too.)

When the dignitaries of Gondor are assembled, the Wanderer speaks:

Thou shalt indeed have peace.
Thou shalt send thy emissaries before Sauron, and they shall kneel unto him, and proclaim him their Lord, and their God.
This city shall disarm, it's citizens shall present themselves to the orcs as prisoners, and the chains of Sauron they shall willingly accept.
Lebennin and Lamedon, Anfalas and Linhir, Anorien and Agrenost, shall all be Sauron's, and all who liveth therein shall be Sauron's chattel, to be used and disposed of as it pleases Sauron to do.
The renegade Rohirrim shall be taken to Mordor and worked there as thralls. In the Mines of Mordor shall their renown valiance and endurance be of use.

And why must this be, O People of Gondor?
Why must ye do this thing?

Ye must accept the consequences of thine own history.

For a millenium did ye build your Realm, and from Tharbad in the northwest, to Umbar in the southwest, did your rule hold.
From Esgaroth to Dorwinion to the Sea of Rhun, and across all of Mordor, Khand, and deep into the wastes of Harad, did your Realm extend.
Ye build mighty cities, and from Osgiliath, Minas Anor, Minas Ithil, Agrenost, Pelagir, and Umbar did ye rule many lands: Edenwaith, Calendhros, Anorien, Ithilien, Anfalas, Lebennin, Lamedon, Rhovanion, Rhun, Harad, Umbar, and yes, ye ruled Mordor as well.

Where is all this strength and power now? Where are the famed Dunedain now?
Ye have been fools. Idiots. Retards. Do ye understand me? Such names are too good for ye! Ye had the glory of Numenor returned in your hands, and ye threw it away.

When the Shadow fell on Greenwood the Great, did ye send your army to deal with this?
Ye did not. And Greenwood fell to Sauron, and became as ye know it now: Mirkwood.
Ye allowed a great menace to grow on your northern border, and ye did nothing.

When Angmar arose in Forodwaith and the northern Misty Mountains, did ye send aid to your kindred in Arthedain, Cardolan, and Rhudaur?
Ye did not. And the Witch-King consumed Rhudaur and Cardolan. Your effort to rescue Arthedain was pathetic ... too little and too late, and thus was a Waste created behind yer borders.

Did ye remain on friendly terms with your elven allies in Lothlorien, Greenwood, Linden, and Rivendell?
Ye did not. In your pride, ye snubbed them, and they turned against ye.
Now, ye dare to speak ill of the Lady of the Golden Wood, and call her fell, and ward against one in whom your wise ancestors placed their lives in her trust.

Did ye remain united?
Nay.
Ye must go into civil strife, because of what ye thinks MIGHT happen ... that ye shall lose the Gift of the Valar more quickly - as if your civil strife did not hasten the loss all the faster!
Ye burned your great city, your Osgiliath. Ye spread mass destruction and desolation across Ithilien, your fairest province. Ye spilt the blood of your royalty, and ye drowned your palantir in the red brine!
Then, in your folly, ye separated, and your kingdom divided into two: Umbar and all of Harad breaking off to form an independent kingdom - like an indepedent kingdom COULD exist there and withstand your enemies for long! This was not the case.

When ye recovered from the Great Plague, did ye reman your fortresses that monitored Mordor?
After all, YE built those fortresses, and for good reason ... but nay, ye abandoned your great towers at the Morannon, and all your listening posts within Mordor.
And your enemies took these fortresses, and made them their own, from which to strike back at ye.

When the Nazgul took Cirith Ungol, did ye fortify your border and protect Minas Ithil?
When the Nazgul besieged Minas Ithil, did ye protect your ancient city with the full might of your army?
When Minas Ithil fell, did ye besiege it, and drive the monsters of Mordor back out?
Nay. Ye were lazy, and ye were scared, and ye were witless. Indeed, ye choose to abandon your own capital, Osgiliath, and flee behind the walls of your Minas Anor, rather than stand up to the Ringwraiths.
Ye dared to call it Minas Tirith then? Ye sent forces to deal with Angmar! Ye had forces plenty and to spare to deal with Minas Morgul and retake it, ere the poison of your enemies forever defiled Imlad Morgul. Ye were too lazy and too inept to see these facts.

Now, your realm had shrunk back to Anduin in the east, and the Great Sea to the south, but ye still held Agrenost.
Did ye maintain Agrenost, or did ye slowly abandon it to the crickets?
Ye did the latter thing, of course, being who ye are. And the wild Dunlendings escaped from ye, and armed themselves, and all Edenwaith was lost to ye, and now a western foe confronted ye.
It did not have to be thus.

When the White Council convened, ye could have attended.
Aren't ye supposed to be among the Wise?
Yet ye could not be bothered.
And ye did nothing to stop the growing power of Dol Guldur, and ye did nothing to stop the massacre of your kin and friends in Rhovanion ... until Rhovanion was Waste, and the Wainriders and Bregolath had their way with it, and the rich vales of Anduin were filled with weeds and bones.
When the orcs came across Rohan, did ye help the Rohirrim fight them, or did ye sit in your tower, studying the stars?
When the elves of Laurelindorian came a-fleeing across your Realm, fleeing the evil in Moria, did ye help them, or did ye leave them to drown?

Ye have proven, time and again, your repeated stupidity.
Ye have proven, time and again, your inability to rule.
Ye have proven, time and again, that ye have no right to rule.
And ye have proven, time and again, that ye have no right to free will, to do as ye please, to have these lands as your own.

Sauron hath proven his wisdom and competence in all these things.
From a shadow did he return, and Greenwood fell unto him.
With the patience that ye lacked, he built up his strength.
With the patience that ye lacked, his servants worked with their master.
With cunning and guile, with domination and with will, did he remaster Rhun, Harad, and Umbar, and made them his fiefdoms.
With cunning and guile, and long planning, did he wrench Wilderland back under his control.
With cunning, guile, and endless patience, he wore thee down, until thou hast almost naught left with which to face him, while swarming armies are at his beck and call.

Sauron hath shown his intellect over thine.
Sauron hath shown his wisdom, time and again, over thine.
Sauron hath shown his leadership, time and again, over thine.
Sauron hath shown his right to rule.
Sauron hath shown his right to be his own master.
Sauron hath shown that he is rightful Lord of Middle Earth.

Ye hath shown nothing but your pathetic, moronic, whimperings and jealousies.

Therefore ...

Ye shall surrender yourselves to Sauron.
Ye shall be on your knees, and placate him, that he shall not slay thee outright, but pleasure to enslave thee at his whim.
Ye shall be his utterly mindless slaves, even as ye have embarked on your utterly mindless history.

Do ye have a problem with this Fate, that YE have brought upon yourselves?
Do not presume that I shall pity thee, for I will not ... ye are not worthy of my pity.
Ye most certainly shall not have HIS pity, for he is without pity.

Kneel to your fate, and accept it, People of Gondor.
Your fate, hard but most deserved, is upon ye.

 

[Fast Learner]

The original post is incredibly political, in my opinion. I can't imagine why political commentary about it would be cut if the OP is so incredibly offensive to people who don't have the same politics and yet is left in place.

If I created a post about how, for example, elves are all homosexuals and made fun of their lifestyle, would the thread be allowed because it was based in fantasy?

Do I need to create a post equating Bush with Sauron so I can reply to it using the same kind of (barely) hidden agenda and not have my post deleted?

Please, just lock the thread. It is political, and to me, incredibly offensive if I'm not allowed to rebut.

 

[Mistwell]

The original post is incredibly political, in my opinion. I can't imagine why political commentary about it would be cut if the OP is so incredibly offensive to people who don't have the same politics and yet is left in place.

If I created a post about how, for example, elves are all homosexuals and made fun of their lifestyle, would the thread be allowed because it was based in fantasy?

Do I need to create a post equating Bush with Sauron so I can reply to it using the same kind of (barely) hidden agenda and not have my post deleted?

Please, just lock the thread. It is political, and to me, incredibly offensive if I'm not allowed to rebut.

Deep breath!

It's all in fun.

Really.

And yes, I would enjoy you writing a similarly witty News From Gondor with a different perspective. Go for it. Perhaps you could write one from the perspective of an Easterling or Orc protestor against Sauron's war on the west?