On players and DMs.

[Limper]

I've been watching a fair number of threads on similar subjects and thought this might prove an interesting angle.....

We all agree the Player/DM dynamic is a fragile thing.... what makes it break down? What can be done to fix it?


To start:

The collapse of trust breaks more games than anything else I'd immagine. If I knew how to fix it..... I wouldn't bitch on message boards so much.


Any of you wise folk care to bring "truth" to the issue?

 

[Falcon]

I play with friends, with people who know we are all getting together to have fun. And we respect each other for who we are. Our gaming is one aspect of our social interactions, not the only aspect.

This is a game, a way to enjoy each other's company and perhaps do things we never thought possible.

That seems to keep everything in perspective for me.

 

[JLXC]

I play with friends, with people who know we are all getting together to have fun. And we respect each other for who we are. Our gaming is one aspect of our social interactions, not the only aspect.

This is a game, a way to enjoy each other's company and perhaps do things we never thought possible.

That seems to keep everything in perspective for me.

Ummm what he said! Falcon you copied me before I could even type it!!!

 

[Desdichado]

I don't have any "old friends" in the area as I've only lived here for 2 years now. So my gamer buddies are just that: gamer buddies. So yeah, establishing that is crucial for us, and we have struggled at times with the issue.

However, for all of us, playing is what counts, so we get over it, talk about what we want and move on.

 

[KnowTheToe]

I think communication is the key. The gaming group I play on all met thru the first Chicago Game Day and the gamers seeking gamers section of this site. People have to be open with what they want in a game. If the game is not meeting your needs, you will start making excuses for not going. Soon you will not be a regular and stop going all together. This can destroy a whole group.

Make sure people talk about what they want in a game.

 

[Knightcrawler]

The group that I'm running right now got together through a game store. They put up a flyer to form a gaming group that could play at the store. We started out with 10 people. Three dropped out over the next couple of months and then we cut some when we when to third edition.

The current group of five have now been playing together now for two continuous years. Its the longest time I've ever been with one group and its great. There not just gaming buddies now but good friends.

You need good lines of communication between the players and the DM. You must keep the players involved and interested in the game. I think it helps if your actually friends with the players and do things with them other than gaming.

Knighcrawler

 

[Sodalis]

There seems to be a recurring theme in these posts: communication solves all problems.

But you are forgettin one little thing- some poeple cant communicate- or at least not atthe same level and wavelengths as other people. what may seem obvious to one may be oblivious to another- and whacked to a third.

I have had a circle of friends for about three years now (college) and we started gaming togtehr when 3e came out. The original DM was a great guy and has been playing for years and so i (as well as others) trust his judgemnet and his ability to maek calls on the fly. But he graduated and moved up north(I live in LA) and othe players started to pick up the slack. though nobody had experience before, it was fun to try.

But with the rotating gorup of rookie DMs, there are bound to be some toes to step on- and I have stepped on my fair share. In my campaigns, i like to play heavy magic worlds- where a lot of mythical things happen and a lot of NPCs act outside of the rules- they just do...

When the other DM takes over (continuing the same campaign) he likes to strip these from us as they make us too powerful- and he likes to go by the books and rules. I dont mind that as much as the way he does it. If he would just tell us, the weapons are too powerful,a dn I would like for you guys to tone them down- no big deal. But he says, "they are perfectly fine- but remember that since you haev those weapons, so can your enemies..." *evil grin* and that is what buggs-

we are an adventuring party and have to stay well rounded- and so cannot focus our attention to any one aspect of the ger. he is the Dm and so can aways focus on ways to get at us- like he knows the majority of us i neutral good. And so he will have all the NPCs carry bane good weapons or chaotic weapons...

Oh well- whatchagonna do.

Sometime Dms dont listen and sometimes player dont feel obligated to make the change in order to comply with the DM. in both cases, the rules makes it hard for the players and DMs to agree what can and is supposed to happen. Other than cheating dice rolls, a Dm cant really tell a player that "this just happens" in order to advance the plot without getting someone upset...

edit:

I think even more importantly than communication (although very important) is the trust that a DM is fair and the players feel that he is not just doing thins to hurt them but rather to tell a story- an not just putting one challenge after another in front of the players.

That si why I had to leave my last gaming group- because the DM was just giving us enough backstory to feed us to the next encounter. One fight aftera nother- and after two years of that- I just got tired of just fighting and no way of playing the character 's stories and histories. the skill lists has dwindled from a list to three skills (concentrate, spot, listen- cleric) all the other skills are never used...