Quieting a chatterbox

[Isida Kep'Tukari]

Try to get her alone before the game or outside the game and flat out tell her that you believe her talking is disruptive. Tell her that you put some effort into making this game work, and so do the other players, and that by talking she is not respecting you or the other players.

If she's not willing to contribute to the game, if she can only have fun by talking to things unrelated to the game, perhaps this is not the form of entertainment for her. If she'd not willing to be taught how to use her character's abilities, than perhaps this is something she doesn't want to do.

Lay on the guilt nice and thick, particularly that she's disrupting the rest of the group and disrespecting you by her chatter and unwillingness to learn her character. If you don't want to go the confrontation route, a letter or e-mail might be in order.

 

[Kender42]

Just assume that everything she says is matched by an equivalent amount of burble for her character and go by the rule that more than six seconds of speech is no longer a free action.

I can imagine that...

*chatter* yadda yadda yadda

DM: Okay you're character is busy talking for the next 48 rounds. I'll let you know when you have an action again.

Player: But!

DM: 49 rounds.

 

[Piratecat]

What Hong said, but talk to her privately - don't embarrass her in front of others.

We use the Piggy Bank system to control table talk and encourage people to stay in character. Once the game begins, it's a $.05 fine for a bad pun, $.10 for each bit of OOC talk, and $.25 for old war stories about former campaigns/PCs. Really works well at keeping people focused, and the money goes to buy people soda.

 

[Jonny Nexus]

Have you tried just stopping (i.e. not saying anything to her, just completely ceasing to talk to anyone) when she starts an out of character conversation with another player, and just waiting until she stops talking (i.e. until she is ready to resume play) before starting again.

If she asks why you've stopped, say: "I was waiting until you were ready."

If she tells you to carry on without her, say: "I don't really want to, the whole point of the game is that everyone's involved, otherwise people will miss bits of the experience*. I'd rather just wait until you're ready."

Hopefully, this will force the issue in a polite way, since she will feel awkward about everyone having to wait while she makes her out-of-character remarks.

And of course, if she says something along the lines of not minding missing bits of the "experience", then you can put on a slightly hurt tone, and say that you work really hard to make the game as immersive and enjoyable for everyone, and that you're a bit hurt that she doesn't appear to fully interested in experiencing that.

* Note:- I mean experience in the sense of "fun, enjoyable activity", *not* XPs.

 

[Jonny Nexus]

Have you tried just stopping (i.e. not saying anything to her, just completely ceasing to talk to anyone) when she starts an out of character conversation with another player, and just waiting until she stops talking (i.e. until she is ready to resume play) before starting again.

If she asks why you've stopped, say: "I was waiting until you were ready."

If she tells you to carry on without her, say: "I don't really want to, the whole point of the game is that everyone's involved, otherwise people will miss bits of the experience*. I'd rather just wait until you're ready."

Hopefully, this will force the issue in a polite way, since she will feel awkward about everyone having to wait while she makes her out-of-character remarks.

And of course, if she says something along the lines of not minding missing bits of the "experience", then you can put on a slightly hurt tone, and say that you work really hard to make the game as immersive and enjoyable for everyone, and that you're a bit hurt that she doesn't appear to fully interested in experiencing that.

* Note:- I mean experience in the sense of "fun, enjoyable activity", *not* XPs.

I should point out that all of that is after you've tried broaching the subject privately and discretely, and if she doesn't appear to be acting on what you're saying.

 

[Shallown]

I agree with the private approach. Just say Simple "Unfortunatley I find your out of game talk a little distarcting I would appreciate you not doing it anymore." Polite and direct. If it continues go to step two remind her in game that you are running and a game and please hold outside conversations till after the game or during a break. After that just ask her to leave. There is a certain amount of politeness but no reason to be walked over becuase someone else has no respect for you.

I handled mine differently becuase of the group I have. I told them I didn't want extra comments or talking about other games. I give one warning then dock Xp after that. I have only docked XP like once or twice. The reason I dock XP for some reason this seems to work. They are hurting the game and it is my way of showing that I don't appreciate it. It is also a hamrless way of saying Hey your upsetting me so stop before I really become upset.

I have become upset once at them and shut down the game for 3-4 months becuase they crossed the line since we started back they have been nothing but polite realizing respect goes both ways.

Hope it helps the most important things to remember apply to all conflicts. Put your self in thier shoes (The fact may be that their shoes are wrong as they are), Be polite until you no longer can be polite (Ie sometimes yelling solves a problem but only as a last resort) and Be firm. Wish-washy fails everytime. No relationship built on spinelessness involves respect.

Later

 

[Kichwas]

If you don't want to go the confrontation route, a letter or e-mail might be in order.

The impersonal nature of email combined with the fact that most of us are not the letter writers or readers of our preceeding generations can make email result in being much more confrontational than a personal touch.

 

[Piratecat]

The impersonal nature of email combined with the fact that most of us are not the letter writers or readers of our preceeding generations can make email result in being much more confrontational than a personal touch.

Says who? You? I don't think so, buddy.

Of course, you're correct; this is something I'd handle in person.

 

[Nightfall]

Tempting....very tempting...

Yes well I'm evil about people I don't like.

 

[orchid blossom]

A private conversation is definitely the best way to address the issue.

I would also suggest to any players who have stated they are disturbed by her trying to chat with them to try this statement. "I'm sorry, I'm trying to listen to the DM right now and I'm afraid I'm going to miss something important. I'll be glad to talk to you about it during our next break." Then focus their attention on the game, even if she continues to chatter. I know it feels rude to ignore someone who is talking, but she is already doing the same thing to the DM. Hopefully the lack of response will encourage her to focus on the game as well.