D&D 5E /Ragequit Rants


First Post
There's bits I don't like.

I know I'm allowed to change them but I don't want to be allowed to change them because it leaves me with almost nothing to complain about.

So I'm raging about the game being too flexible. :rant:


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  • Advantage and disadvantage? Calculating with hundreds of modifiers is far superior and faster than rolling with more dice!
  • Ascending AC and no matrices or THAC0?! This game is dumbed down for people who can't do maths!
  • It's possible to have 20 starting ability score and max HP at first level? It's a game for muchkins!
  • Female dwarves don't how beards by default? Dwarves are no longer unique and fun!
  • Greyhawk is not the default setting? Gygax must be rolling in his grave!
  • No level titles? Leveling up became more soulles and bland!
  • No demi-human level limits? That's racist!
  • Human ability score bonuses? That's racist!
  • No female ability score limits? That's feminist!

/buys a Starter Set and burns it


Some players have expectations wildly different to mine and I can't rely on players swallowing my peculiar rulings wholesale any more like the mindless drones they really are ! Raargh!



This game is too complex in some places!

This game is too simple in some places!

Where's the creepy table about the likelihood of impregnating different races?!

Gnomes killed my father!



First Post
  • No alignment tongues in 5e? No option to use the 1st edition unarmed combat rules? WotC have thrown players like me under the bus. I can see them sitting there laughing at my pain.


Rod Staffwand

aka Ermlaspur Flormbator
1. Lord Darkblade, the Ever Victorious, my awesome level 100 half-shadow-dragon/half-drow gestalt rogue/cleric/wizard/fighter/antipaladin/druid/bard/ninja character can't be recreated using the Basic set.
2 No katana on the weapon list. Katanas are the most awesomest swords ever and NEED to be included. I know this because I know everything about swords and katanas are the best. It doesn't matter though, since they'll screw up the stats AGAIN. Katanas have to be: 100gp, 2d8 slashing, 3 lbs., Finesse, Light, Versatile (4d8) or better to even come close to reality.
3. Lord Darkblade can't have six buff spells up at the same time because of "concentration". He needs those spells to do 1000 points of damage per round with his dual-wielded +10 soul-draining katanas.
4. Advantage is just a crummy re-roll. It doesn't add more higher bigger numbers. What's the point? I like more higher bigger numbers. Lord Darkblade already gets 3 free re-rolls on every roll anyway, since he's the God of Fate.

/rage quit


Not sure which stat I have to use to make a save against posting is this thread. Maybe I can use STR/ INT or CHA here?


E. Tallitnics

What do you mean that 5e doesn't contain any preservatives, dyes or artificial flavors and is locally sourced, organic and sustainable, not to mention recyclable!!!???



My hat of d05 know no limit!

It fails in every aspect that is possible, and fails in som not possible. It is more of a bored game than a boar game. I can't even grill cheese sanwitch,!

Boned accurcy means you never get better at anything. THere is no way of avoiding it. I mean not matt er what you are, you have ability scones!

It is way over simpflied, and two complexicated at the same tim. IT is harder to hit a mmman with a plate, even an appetizer plate. But swords and bettel axis do the same damage. It is supposed to be theater ofn th mend, but dorfs and hoobits mvoe slow, so you jhave to trak it.

Classes, are jokes. really. From how any class and subway can get an bakcground. If you train as soldier, you dont get to be wizzend. In the end it boils down to this.

levle sysem do not work. They may work on pdf, but a level 12 fishhead or even mag doesn't ned to fear having a trident gum at them. Also, with the way hp work, if you you do't have any, you are dead.

The flaw of rolling a d05 is that the best fighter in the world, taking up his most magical sword, misses 20% of the time.ALso fighers are good with all the weapons they use. You get Str bonus on thrown things. But what about if you throw a chicken?

In the end, d05 is too many rules, and not enough rulers at the same time. Need rulers to measure system mastery aka pens size! I am ranting here,and know this doesn't make sense to many people. But I would lke one a reason e5 is a good system.

Dungeon Delver's Guide

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