If I'm throwing a horde of high-hit-point monsters at the party then I-as-DM an willingly taking on the task of tracking all those hit points.
As a preface I will reiterate my table is around 15th level.
I do track hit points, when we play - we play in my lounge and I open up an excel on my tv monitor which tracks initiative, conditions, notes and hit points. I do though appreciate the simplicity that minions can bring to an invovled combat.
And I'm not much for emulating fantasy tropes unless it happens by chance.
Fair. But to be clear this is a common trope in all fantasy.
To the setting at large including the PCs. If a monster takes just one hit point to knock down when a PC strikes it then IMO that should be true for any and every NPC who strikes it as well, whether there's PCs around at the time or not.
To solve the issue with the 1 hit point, I attach 5e's Damage Threshold rule from the DMG which requires x points of damage to be cleared before the damage is validated. i.e. if the Damage Threshold is 10, then any attacks which do 9 or less do not knock down he monster and are ignored.
In broader terms, the setting shouldn't be modifying itself on the fly just because some PCs walked in.
Monsters which are modified to minions, are inconsequential to my setting lore. They're merely challenges in that instant to be overcome.
We see things differently.
Some parts of it are not metagamey or abstract, though, and this is one such place. Simulation says the mechanics of a monster - including its hit points which reflect its toughness and resilience - should be consistent at a given point in time without regard for what that monster is doing or who it is facing.
In 5e PCs have uncapped hit points, healing is much easier and recovery too hence my insistence hit points are a metacurrency rather than some objective truth.
I have made some necessary changes to make the game grittier, which would please some simulationists here

, but the game is faster paced than likely your game which draws its inspiration from 1e and thus I can understand your pushback to the minion concept better than anyone elses involved in this discussion.
In a full-on gamist milieu I can see this. However, I'm not after that full-on gamist situation. I want fog of war, with resulting info gaps leading to not-always-perfect decision-making - just like it'd be in reality.
I'm actually quite particular on what I feel should be a fog-of-war.
Puzzle monster? Yes, because the challenge that this monster provides is to figure out the puzzle.
Secret terrain feature on the map? Yes, because the challenge of the terrain is to navigate it safely.
Minion? No, because the minion's challenge is to keep the attention of the PCs off the BBEG.