Real DnD Heroes

[Dioltach]

The male players exist so that you can stroke your ego by rejecting them.
They're not good for anything else!
And if they don't like it, you'll abuse them with some nasty spells.

Wow, sounds like there's a story behind that one! Pray tell ...

 

[kenobi65]

There's more than one kind of clevage!

I think that's a feat: Great Cleavage.

 

[Cameron]

mm... Anyone heard the song "Cows with Guns"? It sounds very similar to what you guys posted. One of the funniest thing on radio, that. By Dana Lyons.

 

[Yesminde]

Wow, sounds like there's a story behind that one! Pray tell ...

It's not so much A story as something I've encountered in a number of games: female players with rampant insecurities that only do two things in the game: demand to be the center of attention because they are really, really, incredibly good looking (Zoolander, anyone?), and push the male players around.

I can say this freely because I AM a female gamer, so my advice becomes: honey, keep the T&A at home.

P.S. this applies equally to male character that attempt to play female characters. Theoretically it can be done, but often the ridiculousness of the situation gets completely out of control

 

[Cameron]

P.S. this applies equally to male character that attempt to play female characters. Theoretically it can be done, but often the ridiculousness of the situation gets completely out of control

*cough* 300+lb hairy guy *cough* playing lesbian female rogue *cough* with 20+ Charisma (highest stat) *cough*

And yeah. He always wanted to be the centre of attention...

 

[Thunderfoot]

mm... Anyone heard the song "Cows with Guns"? It sounds very similar to what you guys posted. One of the funniest thing on radio, that. By Dana Lyons.

Yes, but this is a little different - these are based off of a beer commercial.

:Cows with Guns: is quiet a humorous song, but it is totally original, our parodies...not so much.

 

[Cameron]

Yes, but this is a little different - these are based off of a beer commercial.

:Cows with Guns: is quiet a humorous song, but it is totally original, our parodies...not so much.

I was wondering if the beer commercial ripped off Cows with Guns The stanzas look very similar.

 

[Thunderfoot]

I was wondering if the beer commercial ripped off Cows with Guns The stanzas look very similar.

I can see where at first blush you could see that, but knowing both sources...they really aren't even in the same neighborhood. (I'm the resident 'music professional' around here, so you'll have to trust me on this.)

 

[Cameron]

I can see where at first blush you could see that, but knowing both sources...they really aren't even in the same neighborhood. (I'm the resident 'music professional' around here, so you'll have to trust me on this.)

Having never heard the beer commercial, I really couldn't tell I just wondered from the stanza structure as written.

 

[Thornir Alekeg]

How about this:

Elven Wine presents: Real DnD Heroes.
Real D N D Heeero-ohs!
Today we salute you, Miss Anime Character Player!
Miss anime character player!
You claim innocence while flashing your enormous bosoms at every opportunity.
There's more than one kind of clevage!
The male players exist so that you can stroke your ego by rejecting them.
They're not good for anything else!
And if they don't like it, you'll abuse them with some nasty spells.
That's a novel use for Evard's Black Tentacles!
So have yourself a nice Elven Wine, Miss Anime Character Player!
Miss Anime Character Plaaaayer

Dear Ms. Yesminde:

As legal representatives of the Dwarven Ale brand, we ask that you cease and desist your use of the Real D&D Heroes advertising campaign for Elven Wine. This flagrant infringement impunes the reputation of Dwarven Ale by implying that Elven Wine is similar to Dwarven Ale. While our clients respect that Elven Wine is a popular alcoholic beverage, the fact remains that raising a glass of it is not appropriate for toasting Real D&D Heroes, but instead better suited for a group of foppish aristocrats who have never accomplished anything heroic, or Bards. We look forward to the suppression of your natural chaotic tendencies and immediate cooperation in this matter.

Sincerely,
Rockhelm Tomesmith
Dwarven Legal Defenders LLP