Sagiro’s Story Hour, Part 331
Angry Jack
Lucas leans back, takes a deep breath, and tries to pretend the encounter is just beginning.
“The Guild is doing well, I’m happy to say. The gem trade is thriving, and we have numerous merchants set up as fronts for our business. The ruler of Seresef is happy with our progress, and Greta tells me we have upwards of 150,000 gold pieces in our coffers at the moment.”
“That’s what I like to see!” Dranko exclaims.
Lucas continues. “The downside is, the gem trade is our sole trans-ocean business venture that has met with any success. The White Sun Cartel has managed to shut down all of our other operations before they could gain any steam.”
Dranko frowns, but Lucas just shrugs. “Honestly, as long as the gem trade remains fruitful, I don’t much care. None of our other ventures, even had they panned out, would have been a tenth as lucrative. I have the usual misgivings about having all of our eggs in one basket, but they’re very nice eggs.”
“Sure,” says Dranko, nodding in agreement. “And think of it this way. If that basket falls apart, we’ll salvage what we can, and then I’ll start a war against the White Sun Cartel, to shake things up a little bit.”
Lucas opens his mouth, closes it again, thinks for a moment. “I suppose you did just defeat a lich, and prevent the Emperor from arriving here, so perhaps you really can win a war against the powerful mercantile arm of the Jewels of the Plains. You know best.”
Dranko just smiles.
Lucas clears his throat. “I continue to send out feelers looking for Farazil, but have not learned anything new. Octavius Hightower leads our efforts on that front, and he’s very good. I expect we’ll have some news there before too long.
“Other than that… there is one small item, that I thought you might take a personal interest in.”
Dranko looks properly intrigued. “Tell me!”
“There has been some extracurricular burglary taking place in Tal Hae recently. The perpetrator is someone very accomplished, and whom we have been unable to pin down.”
“It wasn’t Flicker, was it?” asks Dranko with a grin.
Lucas sighs. “The fellow calls himself Angry Jack. We know don’t know much about him, just rumors, that are placed all around the city. They are largely untraceable, but they all speak to Angry Jack’s fame and prowess. We don’t know if he works alone, or has accomplices. But it seems that he is doing his best to make a name for himself, and it’s reached the point where it’s imperative that we bring him in. Does any of this sound familiar to you?”
“Yeah,” says Dranko. “It sounds like me!”
“Exactly,” says Lucas. “Which is why we thought you might be the right person to deal with him.”
/*/
Morningstar is deep in thought, a magical quill held uncertainly in her hand, when Dranko bursts through the Greenhouse door.
“Would anyone like a fun extracurricular activity?” he asks.
“I’m not sure I want to know,” says Ernie, coming into the living room from the kitchen with a platter of bread and cheese. “Do I?”
Morningstar sets down her pen. “I nearly died,” she says quietly. “In fact, I’m pretty sure I did die for a second, and it would be very bad if I died again without having produced my holy writings for Rhiavonne.”
“How about this,” Dranko offers. “You help me out with this, and then I’ll help you write. It’ll only take an afternoon. There’s a wannabe ‘me’ out there we have to deal with. Remember how I did the Oracle, way back when? We’ve got the same thing here, with someone calling himself Angry Jack and spreading rumors about himself. I’d like to have a little chat with him. I could do it solo, but stuff like this is much more fun with you guys along.”
Aravis perks up. “I could scry him.” He’s quite eager to try out a new spell – greater scrying – which takes less time than the plain version, and is harder for subjects to resist. With Dranko’s blessing he casts the spell, naming Angry Jack as his target. In his mirror he sees a broad-shouldered man in a run-down looking apartment, dressed like a servant. Though the walls are cracked and the window is filthy, the furnishings are actually quite nice; there are painted shields hanging behind him, and he eats off a metal plate with his feet up on an ottoman. He does not appear to be armed.
“I suppose that’s him,” says Dranko, upon hearing Aravis’s report. “Though he could have some kind of magical defense in place.”
For fun, Kibi casts veil to make every last one of them look like Sagiro Emberleaf, before Aravis casts greater teleport and brings the whole Company right into the room with the man. Grey Wolf laments over the mind-link that it would have been more satisfying to kick open the door.
“Hi, Angry Jack,” says Dranko, motioning to the man’s plate. “Do you have enough for all of us?”
The man looks entirely unperturbed by this. “Oh,” he says, looking a bit bored. “You here to see Angry Jack then, are ya? He’s downstairs cooking up some more grub.” His accent is decidedly lower-class, and he takes another bite of his fish.
I’m not buying it, says Aravis over the mind-link.
“Stay where you are,” Dranko instructs the man.
The man doesn’t leave his chair, but he calls down the stairs. “Hey Jack! You got some visitors here! Just blinked in all magic-like!”
“Fine,” comes a voice from below. It sounds gruff and annoyed. “Send them down.”
Dranko blinks. Huh.
“I gotta warn ya,” says the man. “Jack don’t like surprises.”
Dranko peers closely at the man. He’s got good instincts for this sort of thing, and he doesn’t think this man is lying. Maybe this servant and Jack have some shared enchantment that makes one detect as the other to magic spells?
Let’s just settle this, shall we? thinks Morningstar. She casts a silent, still detect thoughts. She picks up the man’s surface thoughts quite clearly. Oh sh*t. Sh*t sh*t sh*t. Who are these people? All I have to do is get them downstairs, and I can get the hell out of here…
Morningstar shares this with the others.
“Just put down your food for a while,” says Dranko. “And we’ll have a little talk. Just you, and me, and my associates.”
“You all look the same, you know,” says the man.
He’s thinking: I can get out through the window. All I have to do is distract that one and… that one, and I’ll be able to make it. I may cut myself, and it’s two stories down, but I know how to fall…
Grey Wolf sidesteps over to stand directly in front of the window.
“I want you to know,” says Dranko, “that we’re not here to kill you.”
“Are you here to kill Jack then?” asks the man.
Dranko sighs. “However, if you want us to continue not killing you, you’ll have to stop pretending that you aren’t Jack.”
“Oh, I’d love to be him,” says the man with true sincerity. “You really think I’m him?”
We can do this two ways,” says Dranko grimly. “You can keep lying, and we can leave you unconscious or dead. Or, you can be honest, and I will make you a more friendly offer. Which would you prefer?”
The man is thinking: I’m way outnumbered, they’re festooned with magic items, and one of them’s probably reading my mind…
Morningstar smiles.
Now he’s thinking: that one.
Aravis smiles.
They’re all reading my mind?
They all smile.
Aw, sh*t. Out loud, he says, “And what is your offer?”
Dranko stares steadily at him. “What’s your name?”
“It’s Jack,” the man finally admits.
Drano raises an eyebrow. “Your name is actually Jack? And you call yourself Angry Jack? Don’t you think that’s a little obvious?”
“No one has figured out until now,” says Jack. “Who are you? And what is your offer?”
“We are representatives of the actual Thieves’ Guild. The Undermen. You’re familiar with it?”
“Yes.”
“I thought so. And you’re thwarting it.”
Jack smiles bitterly. “Good.”
“Why good?”
“Because you deserve it,” says Jack.
“And why do we deserve it?” Dranko asks.
“For not recognizing talent when you saw it.”
“Did we turn you down?”
Morningstar detects strong resentment from Jack at that comment.
Jack splutters. “You don’t even remember… say, in what capacity do you serve the Undermen?”
While Grey Wolf cracks his knuckles, Dranko says, “If you’re smart, you might think I’m an enforcer.”
“Yes,” Jack admits. “I was turned down by the Undermen.”
“Why?”
“I wasn’t good enough, apparently. And also… also they said my attitude was not appropriate.”
“Huh,” says Dranko. “But I can see that you’re a man of potential, of vision, and highly motivated.”
“That’s true,” says Jack. “But still not good enough for you lot.”
“I’m guessing you’re also a lying pain in the butt to work with, and you’ll make your friends look bad to make yourself look better.”
“Yes, that’s more or less a paraphrasing of what they told me ten years ago,” says Jack.
Dranko is taken aback. Jack looks like he’s in his early 20’s. “Ten years ago?”
“I’m more skilled than I was back then… and I was quite good.”
“Look.” says Dranko. “Do you mind if I say something trite?”
“Say whatever you want.”
“You remind me a lot of me.”
Jack smiles. “I’m better looking. In fact, you look like a fop. But that’s not really you, is it? What do you really look like?”
“You’ll never know,” says Dranko.
Jack laughs. “Are you afraid? You have me outnumbered, seven to one! I see. Hiding behind illusions. Is that how the Guild works?”
Kibi thinks: He really DOES remind me of you!
Dranko ignores him. “Let me get this straight. You were turned down when you were 12 or 13 years old?”
“So?”
“Back then, somebody different was running the Guild, and they didn’t always recognize talent. I would like to foster your skills.”
Jack sits up a little straighter. “You’re offering me a paid position?”
“I would like to mentor you,” Dranko clarifies.
Jack gives a disgusted snort. “And what if I don’t wish to be ‘mentored?’ I think I’m doing quite well on my own, thank you.”
Dranko shakes his head. “What you’re doing right now, is not acceptable to the Guild.”
“I’m sorry.”
“No, you’re not. But that’s okay. Your choices are, you can leave the city, or you can have access to a vast amount of wealth and knowledge, and the opportunity to hone your skills. It’s up to you. Or we could kill you.”
“I don’t doubt that you could,” Jack admits. “Though you did need to bring a half-dozen friends. Are they all with the Guild?”
“Nah,” says Dranko.
Aravis smiles benignly at Jack: “We’re here for the sport.”
“And I didn’t want to do my homework,” Morningstar adds.
“If they really want me back,” says Jack, “maybe I should make them work a little harder.”
Dranko sighs. “Look. We don’t want you back. We want you nullified. But frankly, I think you have great potential, and I’d like to see that developed. But we don’t need you. We just like you.”
“Well, he does,” Kibi clarifies.
“You said I could leave the city,” says Jack. “If I start operating in another city, you’ll leave me alone?”
“Of course,” says Dranko.
“When do I have to decide.”
“I’d prefer now.”
“Otherwise you might run,” says Grey Wolf.
Jack puts up his hands. “How can I run? You all just appeared in my house! You can probably scry, am I right?”
“You were thinking about jumping out the window not long ago,” Dranko points out.
“Pffff. Fifteen feet at most. What kind of operator do you think I am?”
“You’re a pretty good second story man,” says Dranko.
“No. I am an exceptional second-story man, and I have a great many other talents besides. First among them, keeping an intensely unflappable demeanor.”
Well, that's certainly true.
“There are people who are better than you,” says Dranko.
“Not many, or I would have seen someone like you long before now. But I’m not as good as you, that’s clear. So, if I become an accredited member of the Undermen, I could rise to great heights?”
“You could rise to great heights right now,” says Aravis.
“He’s talking about reverse gravity,” Dranko adds.
Jack falls silent, and thinks for a moment more.
“I accept,” he says suddenly. “What are the conditions?”
“You need to stop operating independently.”
“Accepted.”
“And I think your talents will be wasted on simple burglary. We may use you for more important jobs. What drives you. Money? Fame? Excitement?”
“Yes, though more the money and fame than excitement. And I do enjoy physical challenges.”
“How good are you?”
“I’m extraordinarily good.”
“How do you feel about travel?”
“I’d prefer to stay in Tal Hae,” says Jack. “I think you’ll find my local knowledge of great value, even to an organization like yours. In fact, I will bet you ten gold pieces that I know at least five things that no one else in your guild knows about Tal Hae.”
Dranko takes a step back. “Not necessary. We’ll have someone contact you.”
“How do I know that the next visitor I get won’t be an assassin?” asks Jack.
“Because if we wanted to, we could turn you to dust in less than five seconds.”
“Really?”
Aravis casts disintegrate and vaporizes a chair. For the first time, Angry Jack’s demeanor becomes somewhat flappable. While his mouth hangs open, Dranko slaps down a handful of coins.
Jack regains his composure. “For me?”
“Consider it a signing bonus.”
“Thank you,” says Jack. “Oh, and I didn’t catch your name.”
“I didn’t give it. And I’m not going to. But we’ll meet again.”
“Do you need to be shown the way out, or will you disappear?”
In answer, Aravis teleports the party away. Back in the Greenhouse, Dranko smiles broadly. “I love you guys!”
/*/
In the Manse, later that day, Dranko returns, this time looking like Turlus the baker. No one glances at him or stops him as he goes to report to Lucas. He shares the details of his encounter with Angry Jack.
When Dranko is finished, Lucas just puts his head in his hands. “Gods, just what I need. Another one of you.”
…to be continued…
