Saying the wrong thing

[Hand of Evil]

"leap on top of him" always gets a snicker or too.

"from the shadow, you hear moaning" had some stalker jokes to it.

"I whip my cat-of-nine tails out to abuse him" "Abuse what, the cat-of-nine tails"

 

[VirgilCaine]

The name he came up with was 'Anarach'. It wasn't until the actual game session when he read it out load that he realised he had called a monster 'anorak'.

I don't get it.

"Turning down the alleyway, you see two men standing on eachother's shoulders..."

I almost spewed water all over my keyboard and monitor too.

Aurance, you aren't alone- there is beverege on my monitor!

What are you people doing drinking stuff around computers?!?

POlymorph self does wondrous things.

 

[Piratecat]

An anorak is another name for a raincoat or a heavy jacket. A little less scary.

 

[DragonLancer]

After a long game several years ago, I had got quite tired and whilst trying to describe the carving of a huge skull on the wall, I for some reason described it as:

"A skull and crossbones but without the crossbones...."

:\

 

[Henry]

...if the character is flanking the bad guy, DO NOT say something like "Stone Bear pounds roughly into him from behind, and the monster screams with pain." Nope. Uh uh, no way, no how. Just trust me on this one.

Look at the bright side: At least you didn't use "fist" as the verb instead of "pound"...


I'm sure I have said some major gaffes over the years, but I can't think of any immediately that stopped the table. I occasionally have brain burps and can't think of an extremely complicated word like "patio" or "corridor" or "sword", but that doesn't stop me from trying.

 

[Farganger]

An anorak is another name for a raincoat or a heavy jacket. A little less scary.

In England, at least in the early 90s when I lived there, it's also a disparaging term for a geek or nerd. (Because they favored hooded anoraks at University.)

 

[buzzard]

I do have a good one where the player screwed things up.

The party is on a mission to destroy a relic of one god in the temple of the oponent god. They get to the final encounter where there is a mummy that is quite over matched for the party. However all they have to do is make a diplomacy check(and speak the appropriate ancient language) and the mummy will cooperate and destroy the relic for them.

One character in the part speaks the language in question. He steps up, rolls a 2 on the die for his diplomacy check and backs it up with with "We have come to sanctify [relic in question] here. " Twas an amazing synergy between rolling and saying the wrong thing.

buzzard

 

[D.Reaver]

In marvel, we were about to fight the bad guy, Nimrod(god that was a long time ago), and the GM goes into a long description of what is happening. He ends with "You see a blue sphere of cascading energy, but you don't know what shape it is".

We sat there for a minute then the smartass of the group holds up his hand and says "Wouldn't that be round".

His face got red, we all laughed and still bring it up occasionally.

 

[Ranes]

Okay, I'll come clean. (Have I just said the wrong thing again?)

The first time I DMed, I couldn't stop saying the wrong thing. If the party entered a room, I'd give them the preliminary description and let slip the locations of secret doors, hidden treasures, occupants' motives, you name it. If I shouldn't have mentioned it, I did. The players thought it was all the more hilarious because I simply couldn't stop doing it. After a dozen or so gaffes, the party opened another door. When I glanced up from my notes to speak, three of the players were making see no evil, hear no evil, speak no evil gestures. Yeah, yeah. Very funny.

 

[adwyn]

After the whole party set off a very loud explosive trap one player, in frustration. "Now we've lost the elephant of suprise" One of the players was quick to take up oni it and now we have a small plastic elephant to remind us of the importance of the elemnt of suprise.