Scrooge + Grinch = me

[Rel]

Dude, even the most weak of stage magicians can put a pan of goop into the oven, and take something else out an hour later. I'm sure your granddad would was up to the task of fooling a coupld of rum-laced helpers

It all makes perfect sense now. So many childhood illusions...shattered...

 

[Farganger]

I think you did the right thing. I'm not going to repeat what others have already said, because they said it better than I could. I will say this. The one person it sounds like that will need you on Christmas is your Grandfather. Have him over for dinner, or go to his house, and spend time with him. Regardless of all the other things and people, he's going to need someone around. I remember my Grandfathers first Xmas without my Grandmother, he was grouchy and tired and complained, but in the end it was obvious that he needed us there.

Same train of thought.

From the facts as stated, I think you did the right thing, but I can't help feel sorry for your grandfather. I'm not sure what my grandfather would have thought/done if Christmas was canceled that first winter after his wife died. But, obviously, that's my family not yours . . .

 

[Nellisir]

Whatever Christmas is about, it certainly isn't about grinding your teeth and hoping nobody starts an argument or something. It doesn't sound like anyone was actually going to enjoy the get-together, so what would be the point?

Maybe in a year, things will have changed, and you can reassess to see if a get-together is reasonable.

That's our exact logic.
Next year we'll probably go with my wife's family, so we could be in Maine (mom's house) or Texas(sister's current residence) or Thailand (brother's residence/the family home) or Vancouver (brother-in-law's family home) or somewhere else (if sister & brother-in-law move, which they are planning). Or they could come here, esp. if we move to a bigger house.

I could really go for Thailand again, but not if we have a baby.

And the current plan is to have my grandfather & aunt over Friday for the night, then Xmas eve dinner at my mother's with my siblings & maybe a few family friends, & then my wife & mother & aunt go to church, and my mom & dad have dueling Xmas dinners.

You guys have helped.
Thanks.

 

[Psychic Warrior]

I think you did the right thing. I'm not going to repeat what others have already said, because they said it better than I could. I will say this. The one person it sounds like that will need you on Christmas is your Grandfather. Have him over for dinner, or go to his house, and spend time with him. Regardless of all the other things and people, he's going to need someone around. I remember my Grandfathers first Xmas without my Grandmother, he was grouchy and tired and complained, but in the end it was obvious that he needed us there.

Very true. I agree completely. Forget about the 'troublemakers' and focus on those who are really going to need some help through the holidays. A co-worker of mine started her own family tradition - she, her husband and two kids check into a fancy hotel on Chritsmas Eve and open presents, swim and generally have a fantastic time (hotel staff around here are pretty bored at Christmas it seems - they had presents for the kids and champaign for the parents - no charge!). They used to drive upwards of 10 hourse on Christmas Day visiting relatives (and came within an inch of divorce too).

I wish I could be with my own family this year but I am staying with my wife's, Next year it'll be mine.

 

[Darth K'Trava]

Actually its about the birth of Christ

Quoted for truthery.

 

[KenM]

I'l glad someone else is not conforming to the masses, like sheep to celebrate xmas. I hate this hoilday. Always have, always will. I never do anything, no point.

 

[Dagger75]

This will be my first Christmas away from family. My brother's family has inlaws coming down from out of state so he is doing stuff with them. My mom came to Tampa last week an we went out to dinner and watched the Bucs lose. She doesn't feel like doing anything big and I am inclined to agree.

So going to start a new Christmas tradition, going to get Heiniken and watch movies all day. That should be fun

But you are in the right. Why put yourself through that misery. Do some stuff with the people that will enjoy it and have fun. Or maybe do things with your mom on Dec 24th and stuff with you dad on the 25th. Next year switch the days.

 

[Rel]

I'l glad someone else is not conforming to the masses, like sheep to celebrate xmas. I hate this hoilday. Always have, always will. I never do anything, no point.

Pace yourself there, Captain Sunshine. You gotta save some hate for New Years too.

I think that to some degree, breaking existing holiday traditions is one of the milestones of adulthood. It shows that you are establishing indenpendance from what the family has always done and making your own traditions that suit your lifestyle and accomodations you make for new people in your life.

I can recall getting a lot of flak from my mother's family for not showing up on Christmas Day or the day after when they all gathered at my Grandmother's house. I just didn't have time after I got married what with celebrating with my mother, then going to my father's house and then to my in-laws all on Christmas Day. So I started driving down to Grandma's house on Christmas Eve and visiting her when nobody else was around. Those are some of my favorite memories of her since we got a chance to talk more and I helped her do a bunch of chores around the house to prepare for the next day.

Several years later we announced that my wife was pregnant. I told my parents that year that there would be no more driving all over hell and gone on Christmas Day after the baby was born. I wanted my daughter to get the chance to enjoy Christmas morning at home and then play with her toys all day, like we did when we were kids. My folks weren't totally thrilled with this idea but they also realized that it's exactly what they did when I was born.

 

[WhimsyTheFae]

First, I'm sorry to hear that Christmas is such an unpleasant experience, but it sounds as though you have made a tough decision. I hope it all works out for you. For the record, I am inclined to think that you did the right thing.

It all makes perfect sense now. So many childhood illusions...shattered...

Second, am I the only person left in this world who actually likes fruitcake? No, I'm not undead. No, I don't have a teflon coated stomach. No, I didn't have my tastebuds removed. I actually like fruitcake (color me crazy).

 

[buzzard]

Second, am I the only person left in this world who actually likes fruitcake? No, I'm not undead. No, I don't have a teflon coated stomach. No, I didn't have my tastebuds removed. I actually like fruitcake (color me crazy).

Obviously we have evidence here of a Charm/Compulsion spell. Maybe the fruitcake lich is an enchanter. <which, given the fact that I for some reason sat through the Good Eats fruitcake episode last night, seems rather logical since I don't like fruitcake>

buzzard