D&D General Shocked how hard it is to get new players now-a-days

[Chaltab]

So while I get the desire to play in person, it's just not convenient for a lot of people. We have so much competing for our time these days and going to a shop or other public location to play has its own issues. Playing pretend in a public setting is just not a lot of people's yum.

But then I have not played D&D in person since 2009 so I'm used to just playing online.

 

[tetrasodium]

In a physical game at a game shop. I have no desire to play online.

I've been trying to get 2 more players for a while. A lot of bites but I bring next to nothing to shore.

I've tried friends and family. Had one cousin express interest but never show.
Friends, same thing. "Sounds cool" but don't show. Even when they lament about not having anything to do that day.
Online boards in my metro area. Made a post about what I'm DMing and wanting players. I've had 3 people say they wished to join. None of them actually show.
People at the store approach and ask if they can play next week. Sure! Don't show.

Closest I had was a co worker and his 2 friends. All 3 showed. Next week the co-worker was sent to another state for surprise job training and his 2 friends were MIA.

I asked my local store to put up a notice board so I can put a posting, can't be bothered.

Why is this so hard? I thought this was the RPG golden age?

I had a much easier time getting players to a table for 3rd and 4th ed. This is like pulling teeth. If my current group ever decided to break up, I don't know what I'd do.

Location matters & not every flgs is going to be the equal of a different nearby flgs. Find the flgs with the larger AL/PFS/TCG nights in your area & go with that one. Odds are good that just saying "hey I'd like to run a game on AL/PFS night, is there a free table?", after a few weeks you might have a semiregular group that you can take to a different night for non-al/pfs/etc game.

The other thing that works is to talk with the store & work out a day/time to run a game where the store has room & isn't busy (this might be the night they are unpacking boxes of new stuff delivered to them in the room with you). Get the FLGS itself to post it as an event to its facebook page that you are going to be running xyz one shot-ish adventure likely to finish in 1-2ish sessions & depending on interest might run it a couple more times on subsequent weeks to keep the table size down to a manageable number each week.... 4-6 is a good target here because a noshow or two dropping it to 2-5 is less of an issue than if you were aiming for a smaller table with 2-3 that is now 1-2. If everything works out with one of those groups talk to them about how you'd be interested in running a longer term ongoing thing on a different day or after the next game or two if they are interested.

Also reach out to everyone who marks that they are interested or going. Do it once after they tag themselves & then again a day or two before just in case they forget or change their plans

 

[FrozenNorth]

Why is this so hard? I thought this was the RPG golden age?

I had a much easier time getting players to a table for 3rd and 4th ed. This is like pulling teeth. If my current group ever decided to break up, I don't know what I'd do.

I think you need to be realistic about your expectations concerning this being a Golden Age of RPGs.

Yes, more people are trying and playing RPGs.

BUT, if you are a 30-something-plus looking for other people your age to play, a lot of them have full-time jobs, families, dating and other hobbies making it difficult for them to make the time.

Of course, 15 years ago when you were playing 4e (or 20 years ago when you were playing 3e) you and your friends had more time and it was easy to organise a game.

Not to mention other barriers to finding players. Teens might be willing to play, but are less likely to want to play with Gen Z or Boomers rather than people their own age. Unless you live in a city just getting around can be a challenge for people without cars.

I second the suggestions of putting up flyers in game shops (or even making friends with the owner and having him recommend you). You can also advertise an in-person game online.

 

[Horwath]

it's time and convenience.

If sessions is late and I'm tired after 6+ hours of D&D, last thing I want is to drive dead tired for 30min to get home.

it's a risk and I do not get those 30min of sleep also.

 

[Reynard]

I miss in person gaming, the tactile nature of rolling dice, it's easier to read the group. Plus I'm less likely to get second screened, a friend of mine is always playing WoW during our online sessions.

This is the worst. People that can't manage to stay engaged drive me nuts.

Of course, one of them that does it online is also one who does it in person, fiddling with their phone while playing then wondering what's going on. Ugh.

 

[FrozenNorth]

The other thing that works is to talk with the store & work out a day/time to run a game where the store has room & isn't busy (this might be the night they are unpacking boxes of new stuff delivered to them in the room with you). Get the FLGS itself to post it as an event to its facebook page that you are going to be running xyz one shot-ish adventure likely to finish in 1-2ish sessions & depending on interest might run it a couple more times on subsequent weeks to keep the table size down to a manageable number each week.... 4-6 is a good target here because a noshow or two dropping it to 2-5 is less of an issue than if you were aiming for a smaller table with 2-3 that is now 1-2. If everything works out with one of those groups talk to them about how you'd be interested in running a longer term ongoing thing on a different day or after the next game or two if they are interested.

This entire paragraph also works for your local library.

 

[Vael]

This is the worst. People that can't manage to stay engaged drive me nuts.

Of course, one of them that does it online is also one who does it in person, fiddling with their phone while playing then wondering what's going on. Ugh.

I dunno, to say he's not engaged is overstating it. I have three parents in my group, there hasn't been a single session that hasn't been brought to a screeching halt by a need to go do active parenting, so I get the multitasking.

 

[KYRON45]

This is the worst. People that can't manage to stay engaged drive me nuts.

Of course, one of them that does it online is also one who does it in person, fiddling with their phone while playing then wondering what's going on. Ugh.

This killed an online game for me. One of the players was also playing WOW during our games. When I asked what the deal was he explained that D&D was just what he did while waiting for IDK, screens to load or raids to start etc. Had the same problem with a guy playing softball. TTRPGs was just his filler hobby.

Trust me when i tell you that the casual player doesn't know anything about the golden age of RPGs.

I wish you well in finding your game.

 

[FitzTheRuke]

I find it comes in waves. My first few months of my latest campaign at my FLGS, I had a lot of no-shows (just like you describe - people would ask during the week if they could join a game, and I'd invite them for Saturday, and then they'd not show up). I kept having one or two players, and getting my kids to fill in the table so we could play - sometimes I cancelled, sometimes I played with whoever was there.

Then one joined, then another, then another, and I wound up having to turn people away. I'll probably have to make a second group, if I can find the time. It took several months!

The reason people are so bad for ghosting, is because of what people have described above. There's too much competition for people's time. They're still not entirely comfortable hanging out in a store with strangers.

 

[Mannahnin]

When the lockdowns ended and things started to open back up, my gaming group discussed whether or not we would return to in-person gaming. Only one person (out of 7) voted in favor of it; everyone else wanted to keep using Roll20 and/or Foundry. (We go back and forth, depending on who our DM is at the time.)

There is a lot I like about in-person gaming: the little impromptu dinner parties, the camaraderie, the physical dice and graph paper. Everyone in my gaming group loves those things, and misses them...but nobody misses driving across town, dealing with traffic and parking, hiring a babysitter, designating a driver, hauling their books and dice and pencils and etc. When it comes to actually getting my group to show up, on time and ready to play, online gaming can't be beat. It's the easiest and best option for us.

Yeah, the convenience of not needing to travel (and the time saved) can make or break a group, especially as it may open up weeknights for play that would otherwise not fit into people's schedules.

I have a Wednesday night group right now with a group of friends who I used to play with in person from ~2000-2011, and it being online is the only reason we were able to get the band back together. Our disparate homes meant most of us had around an hour travel time each so we used to play all afternoon & evening on Sundays to make that worth it. With kids and other commitments that has not been feasible for years.

I miss in person gaming, the tactile nature of rolling dice, it's easier to read the group. Plus I'm less likely to get second screened, a friend of mine is always playing WoW during our online sessions.

The worst! (I say, acknowledging my own sin in that I've second-screened myself). The last 5E group I played in online with some younger friends also had this issue. My three year OSR campaign seemed to avoid it, in part perhaps because those guys were all near my age and the faster pace of action kept their attention better. Although with that group, the safety factor of playing from home enabled more drinking and that was occasionally a disruptor (especially falling asleep playing late on a Friday after having worked that day).

For me I still vastly prefer in-person gaming, but I can agree it's a lot harder to get a game going. In the time that I've been trying to get an in-person group, I've GM'd two full campaigns and played in 3, all online. For me, it's significantly more of a hassle to prep a game in a VTT than in person, since it feels like in person play requires a lot less things I need physically prepped (like a map/walls in Foundry or token art) since there's a lower expectation of what's going to be available as play materials than online. There's also a lack of technical difficulties I'll face in person, since for in-person games I handwrite my notes in notebooks, use home made tokens, and draw on a flip map for dungeons/location encounters. It's also nice because if I do feel the artistic edge to do some more work I can give physical prop/materials, which always feels cool to do.

I can see, however, from a player perspectives that the downsides of in person play can outweigh the good, since it's not mechanically making anything easier or harder for you with in person (other than improved social interactions with being able to see each other in true real time and read faces easier), and it adds a time barrier of travel to and from the location, and a possible cost if it's at a game store or other location that charges to use their space.

Yes to all of this. OMG it was intimidating trying to move my in-progress 5E game online when I was so used to using procedural content generation and improvisation and going with the players' flow, sketching maps quickly on my Chessex battlemat with a marker and raiding my game room next door for miniatures for whatever foes I might need. My OSR game sprang out of the desire to teach myself Roll20 and the idea that a dungeon-focused game let me upload a bunch of level maps in advance and simplify my prep. (My 5E game had been split between a huge city and Feywild wanderings, with the occasional dungeon, but generally only small ones).