I want to address this on two different levels.
First, no. Jedi don't get to...
Well first of all, there are no Jedi in this game. This is set during the early years of Rise of the Empire, and any surviving Jedi right now are being hunted down and killed by Darth Vader and his minions. And the entire party is Bounty Hunters working as official and licensed Imperial Peacekeepers as members in good standing of the Guild and vassals of House Benelux. And right now they are in a situation where not everyone in the Empire is a raving psychotic. Early on, a lot of the Empire is people who built their career in the Republic - patriots trying to do the right thing. The Hunters don't really like the Empire, and they can see its corruption and its developing problems. But a lot of the bounties that they are on are legitimately protecting the public from raving psychotics. One of the major influences of the game is Batman: The Animated Series, where they are fighting some villain of the week with some sort of schtick. Those villains are often themselves the victims of something, often the Empire, but the villains themselves aren't behaving justly in response to the injustice against them, but targeting innocents or otherwise don't care who gets in their way. The Hunters don't really like the Empire, and sometimes, they double cross the Empire and work for the nascent rebels, but so far they haven't really been put into a situation whereas a matter of conscious they have to fail a job or openly rebel against Imperial rule and become "criminals". I've been deliberately holding off on that in order to show normal life as a Bounty Hunter when the profession was somewhat honorable - some of the only Justice that people in the outer rim could rely on. At some point yes, they will be asked to do things by the Empire that I think they'll reject doing, but that's still in the future.
pull in the Force points to strong arm a sci-fi a negotiation for the same reason good-aligned Clerics don't get to sneak love potions into a meal to help at a fantasy negotiation
No, that's a terrible analogy. A force point doesn't strong arm a sci-fi negotiation. It's not mind control. All that is happening is by the use of the force a person is guided towards saying or doing the right things that would accomplish the good that they are trying to achieve.
Because using the Force that way isn't actually using diplomacy and persuasion. It's using magic, external manipulation, and mind control to get the outcome you want.
Absolutely not. Using a force point is not a spell. Using a force point does nothing to anyone else at all. To the extent that it is magic at all it's just divination. Of all the many paths that you could take, you take the one that achieves the result. You are affected, but the target is not. If you must compare it to D&D style magic (which it isn't) it's more like the spell 'True Strike' than it is 'Charm Person'. Using a force point is not wielding a Force Power in any fashion. It's just becoming more one with the universe for a moment and gaining a certain level of enlightenment.
Ben Kenobi could get away with clouding the mind of a stormtrooper because he was an enemy combatant...
I actually quibble with Kenobi's glib use of Mind Control, and certainly it was vastly more questionable than anything my PCs have done. (And that's not even getting into the fact that in the Star Wars RPG, as a force sensitive he's held to a higher standard than normals.)
but he couldn't use a Force point on it no matter how scared he was of getting caught
Except Kenobi wasn't scared of getting caught. The Stormtroopers represented zero threat to him. He didn't use his force powers or his force points to save his own hide. He was trying to save Luke and the droids from harm to save the entire freaking galaxy. And absolutely you can always use a Force point to protect those weaker than yourself. Like that is one thing I will never quibble with the use of a Force Point over.
And he couldn't use the force to negotiate with Han, ever.
I would kind of agree with that, although again, he's not negotiating with Han to save his own skin, but to save the galaxy. If my player says, "Look we don't have that kind of money, but the Empire has built a new planet killing weapon, and getting these droids to Alderaan is the only thing that may stop the Empire from destroying inhabited worlds. We can't pay you, but I appeal to your sense of honor.", that's not an attempt to connive anyone out of their money or an act of greed on the player's part. I'm not going to say he can't use a force point for that. That would be really petty as a GM, and I wouldn't want my GM to be that petty.
But sure, if he's trying to trick someone to their disadvantage or he's doing something that has its only result as personal gain, then yes they probably lose that Force Point and probably gain a darkside point.
Second, when looking at this whole conversation from a larger level, it seems you are struggling with Force points as a meta-currency. And IMNSHO it sounds like problem is that you're treating them too much like currency. You need to make them a whole lot more meta.
Force points are only there to enforce the feel of the game you want to bring to your players. If they're not doing that, they're not working. And if they're not working, the player doesn't get a replacement Force point. It's not just a transaction where if the player uses them in a way the makes the mission successful, then they are justified.
I'm sorry, but ultimately Luke destroying the Death Star with a Force Point comes down to him mechanically just doubling his dice pools so he can take a dodge action, and a piloting action, and still have enough dice left in his Star Ship gunnery pool to make that Heroic "one in a million shot". That's ultimately no more than using a Force Point in a way that makes the mission successful. There isn't anything "more" to do there.
Quibbling over what is heroic is exactly what you need to do as a GM. The next time you feel like...
Being petty is not the "solution" I was looking for.