Tales From The Old Bald One-Eyed Salty Red Dog Tavern! (chapter 1, now closed)

[Wystan]

"Oh-ho, faster than I thought. Well, none the less I shall flay thee within an inch of your life. The leader should suffer the worst they say. Desert, maim the leader.
I proceed to stab at the remaining thugs and Dan as much as possible.

 

[LogicsFate]

K moves quickly, rounding the fight and the box to bar Dan’s progress Striking her earlier pose and belting out a grating laugh,

K proceeds to berates Dan, for his evil ways "I hope you've seen the error of your ways, Attacking people with no provocation is wrong. Being wrong is evil and evil never wins"

"I can just sincerely hope your eyes have been opened by this experience, and you will now look for a more appropriate job"

K taps her foot impatiently"Look at me when I talking to you"

 

[Lazlow]

K moves quickly, rounding the fight and the box to bar Dan’s progress Striking her earlier pose and belting out a grating laugh, K proceeds to berates Dan, for his evil ways "I hope you've seen the error of your ways, Attacking people with no provocation is wrong. Being wrong is evil and evil never wins"
"I can just sincerely hope your eyes have been opened by this experience, and you will now look for a more appropriate job"
K taps her foot impatiently "Look at me when I talking to you"

Richard, still following orders, stabs at the remaining vagabond. And with great success, too, it seems, as he slides off of Richard's sword and falls to the ground in a heap.

Ranti springs down from his perch on the dead thug and says, "Oh-ho, faster than I thought. Well, none the less I shall flay thee within an inch of your life. The leader should suffer the worst they say. Desert, maim the leader." Measuring Dockside Dan's life right up to that last inch, he proceeds to make good on his promise, flourishing his sword hither and yon to deliver the killing stroke. But, alas, he flourished one flourish too much, and his sword flew most flourishly out of his hand and stuck (with a flourish) in the crate off to his left.

Dockside Dan, sensing he is surrounded, pulls out a long, wicked dagger and begins flailing around him blindly (of course). He comes close to K, but she easily steps out of the way.

Ignoring the pain of the blow to the back he received earlier, Desert moves in on the leader of these thugs and follows Ranti's suggestion, maiming him quickly and efficiently. However, his measurement isn't as precise as Ranti's would have been, as he went well past that last inch of Dockside Dan's life, and he (Dan) presently expires.

And with that, the last of Dockside Dan's Dockside Gang is no more.

With this nasty business over, you all notice for the first time the crowd that has gathered around you to watch. Most of the townspeople seem relieved, if not outright happy, that this maritime bully is finally gone. Of course, now that there are bodies to be disposed of, most of them leave.

However, you do notice three people standing off in the distance, just outside The Water Weasel: A very large, very fat man wearing a purple doublet over white shirt, brown leggings, and bright green shoes (quite ridiculous, really, for a man of such immense girth), and two shady-looking characters flanking him on either side. Literally shady, to be sure, as they each are completely covered in long brown cloaks with hoods. The fat man looks at you, and as your eyes meet, he nods tersely, a frown clouding his face. He turns (quite a laborious task for him, I assure you) and goes back inside The Water Weasel. His two cloaked companions follow him inside, melding into the shadows within.

Suddenly, breaking the eerie mood of the scene, a voice rings out from on high: "Oy! Who be ye, ye who be cleanin' th' docks o' this vermin?" Turning, you see that it's Wet Willie, the Harbormaster. Somehow, he's climbed up and taken a seat on top of the crate in which Ranti's sword is stuck (indeed, the sword is sticking out right under one of Wet Willie's feet). He claps his hooks together in applause, making a tink, tink, tink sound.

 

[Wystan]

I lift my Blindfold, proceed to puke over the dockside and lower the blindfold again.
"K, can you please hand me my sword?
I turn towards the voice that I hear off to the side...
"I would be Ranti Akande, Swordsman of Renown. I am a duly authorized deputy and this scum was on the receiving end of wee deserved justice.

 

[Lazlow]

"Well, ye be doin' the town a great service, aye," Wet Willie says as he scoots closer to the edge of the crate. "We're obligin' to yeeeeAAAIIIGGHHH!!!!!" he concludes, now dangling from the side of the large wooden box; it seems that Ranti's sword was not stuck under his (peg) leg so much as it was stuck through his peg leg, right into the crate. He is momentarily surrounded by a flurry of red, green, gold, and blue feathers as his parrots flap about him, finally coming to rest on his crotch and the other outstretched leg. "Oy! Now what trickery be this?!?" he complains, flailing his arms about, trying to right himself.

 

[LogicsFate]

K wears an expression of immense presure right up until Willie starts talking, she flinches at each tink, and scowls at his mishap "Sure" as a response to Ranti

Walking over to the crate, K grabs the pommel and gives a harsh pull, meant to seperate the weapon from both the crate and WW. "Here Ranti, your sword-rapier thing" she tosses it to him.


Looking around at the felled enemies"I guess we should bury them. I'll do it! First though, Richard and I need to buy a shovel" Richard and K go buy a shovel and some paper if she doesn't already own any and a pen and ink.

Edit: As an almost after thought "Richard put away your weapon and come on"

2nd Edit: OOC: What's a doublet

 

[DrZombie]

Gruaamsh Skullcleaver.

Berserker Bill pulls out his knife to slit the throat of the Captain, because quite frankly, he's had it with the whole thing--Dudley be damned--when some sort of giant brute comes in asking about a Sherriff. (oh, now, you know Bill wouldn't cut a man's throat in cold blood!)

Bill puts his knife back, throws the reward paper at Phyfe, saying "Use all 5 pounds to get liver."

He turns to the new "man" on the scene and says, "I'm Sherriff Berserker Bill. What are you supposed to be and who sent you?"

(OOC: Man, Desert is hardcore!)

"I'm Gruaamsh skullcleaver" The half-orc says, taking another swig from his bottle. "And if you kill that man in cold blood you'll find out who I'm supposed to be."
"Anyway, they say you are putting together a team of adventurers to find an orb of some kind. I do not know why on earth these people just can't seem to help themselves, but, well, here I am, 'ready to serve' " He says with a slight tone of disgust in his voice.

 

[Lazlow]

K yanks the weapon free, and Wet Willie lands on the ground with a thud. "Hrm, huh-hrm, arr, nasty business that, arr, yarr..." he mumbles as he sets himself upright, his parrots settling back into their usual perches. "Well, me lubbers, ye can rest assured ol' Wet Willie'll be informin' the Captain o' the guarrrd o' yer heroics, arr!" He stands up "quickly" (quite a spectacle indeed, at one point he resembles a knee-less camel), and says, "Yarr, there'll be quite a rewarrrd in it for ye if Wet Willie has anything to saaAAAAIIIIEEEEE!!!!......" he finishes as he walks straight over the edge of the dock and lands in the water with a *sploosh*.


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OOC: A doublet is a kind of a coaty, vesty-like thingy, which may or may not have sleeves (the fat man's doesn't). Here's a bad pic of one: http://www.pillagedvillage.com/intpvonline/images/bigpics/doublet.jpg

 

[Ranger Rick]

Desert ignoring Wet Willie tilts his head as he watches the blood puddle in the dirt.

 

[Wystan]

With blindfold still firmly in place...I walk towards the dock edge to help Willie up whilst speaking...

"My good dockmaster sir. We appreciate the offer and will be sure to do our best to continue to police your fair city whilst we have the opportunity. The fellows here..." I gesture around slightly broadly "decided to test our mettle. I would hope we do not need to do this again. But villainy of any stripe must be stopped. We are but humble adventurers thrown into the cruel mercy of deputy hood. We seek to right wrongs and have great ballads sung about our worthiness. We got these matching outfits so that we could easily be recognized and we know that the populace will feel safer knowing that we are seeking to protect them while we are here. All we ask in return is small rewards and presents. Desert here..." again with the wild gesturing "is a formidable foe as are Richard and K. None should cross us.