Very recently, I've had several different friends involved in very similar social situations where someone tattled on somebody else. None of this involved myself, merely something I heard about from the parties involved.
I am curious as to what y'all generally think about the right or wrongness of it, and if there is any precedent for documenting the proper protocol for such a situation (a Miss Manners quote perhaps).
Here's the framework of the situation:
Person A tells topic X about person B to person C
Person C decides to tell Person B what was said by Person A
Person B gets mad at Person A
Person A is now mad at Person C for blabbing
Regardless of any moral wrongness on the part of Person A, if their intent was not to have anybody mad, they failed, and effectively the first mistake was on their part.
Seperate from that, I am curious as whether Person C did the right thing.
Is it OK to tell somebody what was said about them (or what impacts them)?
Does the nature of Topic X matter in the answer?
Examples of Topic X (if it matters):
I think Person B is ugly/unpleasant
I think Person B is bad at their job
I blame Person B for what went wrong (and Person B was at fault)
I blame Person B for what went wrong (and Person B was NOT at fault)
I blame Person B for what went wrong (and Person A was ACTUALLY at fault)
Person B's spouse is cheating on them
I'm going to do something bad to Person B
I think Person B did somethhing bad
Anyway, let's see what people think, and see if anybody knows any documented sources for "best practices" etiquette-wise.
I am curious as to what y'all generally think about the right or wrongness of it, and if there is any precedent for documenting the proper protocol for such a situation (a Miss Manners quote perhaps).
Here's the framework of the situation:
Person A tells topic X about person B to person C
Person C decides to tell Person B what was said by Person A
Person B gets mad at Person A
Person A is now mad at Person C for blabbing
Regardless of any moral wrongness on the part of Person A, if their intent was not to have anybody mad, they failed, and effectively the first mistake was on their part.
Seperate from that, I am curious as whether Person C did the right thing.
Is it OK to tell somebody what was said about them (or what impacts them)?
Does the nature of Topic X matter in the answer?
Examples of Topic X (if it matters):
I think Person B is ugly/unpleasant
I think Person B is bad at their job
I blame Person B for what went wrong (and Person B was at fault)
I blame Person B for what went wrong (and Person B was NOT at fault)
I blame Person B for what went wrong (and Person A was ACTUALLY at fault)
Person B's spouse is cheating on them
I'm going to do something bad to Person B
I think Person B did somethhing bad
Anyway, let's see what people think, and see if anybody knows any documented sources for "best practices" etiquette-wise.