Then you have a problem beyond 4th edition. You want to dictate what others think and/or tell you.I'm looking for people to stop trying to tell me that 4e is primarily a tactical skirmish game,
If you don't want to hear what someone thinks about 4th edition, don't discus it with them. Also note that most of the design focus going into 4th edition and its mechanics was based around "two teams meeting to fight". Examples used were the skirmish game and basketball games.
That is where the focus is in 4th edition because that is the fulcrum. The point upon which the game was balanced.
It is actually the ONLY thing about 4th that hasn't been disagreed with so much that it required total reform. Skill challenges, healing, etc have all been under the knife by many people, but the biggest complaint about the core of the system, the combat, it the length of time or maybe how generic all the classes come to feel if they are all doing things the same way.
The part people like continuously about 4th is its tactical skirmish platform. You see a new person pick up the book and start reading the PHB and ask if it is a game like Warhammer, because the PHB looks like a Army Book for it, then that isn't the fault of the person, but the design of the product.
But that is the design that was wanted. One focused primarily on combat, the thing that gives that "movie action". The cinematics trying to be created from action movies and video games were telegraphed through the game and for it.
SO the problem more to the point of being the game itself, and how others view it versus what you want to see it as, or do.
Others won't view it the same way. 2nd edition to many felt like a tactical skirmish game when Combat and Tactics was added in the Player's Options series. 4th edition looks an awful lot like that and its focus. All those infamous quotes from the designers about what is and isnt fun is to sell it as a combat oriented game to capture those people.
Maybe you should complain to Mearls, Wyatt, Slaviseck, etc that promoted and designed the game that way; rather than the people that agree with them.
Nobody is telling you you have to see the game in ONLY that way, but you have to accept it IS seen in that way by many. It is one view of the game.
or that a game run without a pre-build setting cannot be anything but a series of hack-n-slash random encounters
There is no rhyme or reason. Encounters exist to be had when needed, IS just a series of hack-n-slashes. You can loosely connect them with a story, but there is little when the reason the encounter exists is because the players want one now.
You are being given critiques/reviews of things and getting mad at them.
Me or anyone else seeing your way of playing as not a good way to play, doesn't stop you from playing that way, nor your group if that is how you want to play. Everyone doesn't agree on the same way to play.
That is just the whole thing, people have to accept others do things differently. Then you won't be so upset about it.
Ah - but suppose you talked about your love of Bond movies fairly often with your friends, and every time you did, your Mom hopped into the room to mention how "Daniel Craig isn't James Bond."
If she was welcomed into the discussion, then you have to accept it, even if you disagree with it.