JimAde said:
Maybe it's because they are so "D&D-ish". By which I mean they were invented specifically for the game. All the other potentially cliche things you mention have an origin outside the game (folklore, Tolkien, or another literary source or even history). I believe even color-coded dragons have SOME reference in myth and folklore, in that golden dragons are a chinese schtick and they're good.
But elves with ebony skin that live underground are original to D&D. So maybe they see anything that uses them as "fanfic".
Well, except for the Svartalfar of Norse mythology. Sometimes referred to as Trow, which when spoken can also sound a lot like Drow. Gygax definitely borrowed a lot of concepts from mythology and "dark elves" are not all that unique.
Sure, everyone wants to play a good drow. I thought of it myself way back when I first picked up G1-3: Against the Giants. (This was after the individual releases of G1, G2, G3, and well before the release of GDQ.) I'm thinking it was probably around 1982 or so, but I could be wrong. Still, it was long before Drizzt (sp?) came around. It's a neat character hook, somebody that has trouble in daylight and is trying to buck the trend for his or her entire race. You deal with prejudice, the questions of nature vs nurture, overcoming the bad juju you experienced while growing up to be a good person, and you get some nifty abilities if you can just convince your adventuring companions to go underground, or switch to a nocturnal schedule.

There are the makings of some good stories there. The problem is that Salvatore got his published with a lot of success. Now, if you want to deal with those issues in a fantasy story, you risk being called derivative. Of course, if you want to write a large epic with flavor and depth, where somebody with a good heart is trying to single-handedly overcome the evil in the world, using nothing more than his purity, you are just derivative of Tolkien.
The real question is what is the point of your story? What adventure is there? What underlying message are you possibly writing about? Is a drow necessary to tell that story? What is your motivation in using a drow? Are you trying to address some of the issues that would come up including a character from that society? Would it be possible to do the same thing by not using that ready-made template of drow society? If so, why don't you create more of your own stuff? If not, why not?
I suspect the reason your players don't mind meeting a drow in game is because you weave it into the game in a transparent manner. You probably aren't tossing out a drow ranger that is just kewl and could kick their butts if they diss him. You probably make the NPC interesting to interact with. There is probably a reason for the NPC to be there, even if it is just to represent that the drow exist in your world and are interacting with it. Within the game, you want to have some of the implied baggage that comes with a drow. Ooh, there was a drow walking out of that shady jewellers shop in the alley in the bad section of town. Maybe there is some sort of *big bad plot* happening. But, those assumptionds don't work as well in fiction writing.
If you want dark-skinned elves to write about, find a new hook for the characterization. Or, create a new template for what they are, and what they are not. Or, find a different way to tell the story you want to tell. If you have a compelling story that you want to write about, it might not be that important if people who haven't read it think it is derivative.