D&D 4E The Orc and the Pie - 4E
- Thread starter Nytmare
- Start date
I'm A Banana
Potassium-Rich
I see a few problems here where the converter kept a few sacred cows.
#1: The orc does not have breasts.
#2: The pie should be a Warpie. Pies are a sacred cow we sacrificed with 4e, since no one wants to be a baker. Now, the pie has relevance for adventurers because it is useful in combat. Warpies are forged, not baked. But not forged by PC's, because craft skills are boring. They are forged, probably, by dwarves, if your group cares about that kind of simulationist crap.
#3: There is no special effect that moves anyone anyplace. This makes for a static and boring combat. Fix pls.
#4: A 10 x 10 room isn't cool. Make it a 50 x 50 temple with rubble on the floor
Alltogether, too faithful to the original. CONVERSIONS AREN'T POSSIBLE, 4E IS A NEW GAME! ALL YOUR PIES ARE BELONG TO GLEEMAX!
Hehehe, that was cathartic.
#1: The orc does not have breasts.
#2: The pie should be a Warpie. Pies are a sacred cow we sacrificed with 4e, since no one wants to be a baker. Now, the pie has relevance for adventurers because it is useful in combat. Warpies are forged, not baked. But not forged by PC's, because craft skills are boring. They are forged, probably, by dwarves, if your group cares about that kind of simulationist crap.
#3: There is no special effect that moves anyone anyplace. This makes for a static and boring combat. Fix pls.
#4: A 10 x 10 room isn't cool. Make it a 50 x 50 temple with rubble on the floor
Alltogether, too faithful to the original. CONVERSIONS AREN'T POSSIBLE, 4E IS A NEW GAME! ALL YOUR PIES ARE BELONG TO GLEEMAX!
Hehehe, that was cathartic.
Just Another User
First Post
Kamikaze Midget said:
did you notice there is no door? you need teleport to get the pie, problem solved.
Sorry, but you fail to capture the spirit of 4e.
The rooms needs to be enlarged to 200x200 squares and they have to be made of at least 15 different challenging terrains (to get the most out of the new tactical combat powers).
Also the lone orc needs to be assigned at lest 24 orc pie guardian minions.
Sorry, but 4e is finally getting rid of the terrible game that D&D has been for the last 30 years and which no one ever played. You direct translation is a prime example of all the terrible scrap that the previous rules are and the reason why D&D always was the least popular P&P on the market.
The rooms needs to be enlarged to 200x200 squares and they have to be made of at least 15 different challenging terrains (to get the most out of the new tactical combat powers).
Also the lone orc needs to be assigned at lest 24 orc pie guardian minions.
Sorry, but 4e is finally getting rid of the terrible game that D&D has been for the last 30 years and which no one ever played. You direct translation is a prime example of all the terrible scrap that the previous rules are and the reason why D&D always was the least popular P&P on the market.
EATherrian
First Post
I like it, but I can't really trust any adventure that doesn't feature a gazebo. Sorry, I have standards to maintain.
mach1.9pants
Hero
For those that want to run this adventure using 3E rules:
GROK: Orc, 1st-Level Warrior
Size/Type: Medium Humanoid (Orc)
Hit Dice: 1d8+1 (5 hp)
Initiative: +0
Speed: 30 ft. (6 squares)
Armor Class: 13 (+3 studded leather armor), touch 10, flat-footed 13
Base Attack/Grapple: +1/+4
Attack: Falchion +4 melee (2d4+4/18-20) or javelin +1 ranged (1d6+3)
Full Attack: Falchion +4 melee (2d4+4/18-20) or javelin +1 ranged (1d6+3)
Space/Reach: 5 ft./5 ft.
Special Attacks: —
Special Qualities: Darkvision 60 ft., light sensitivity
Saves: Fort +3, Ref +0, Will -2
Abilities: Str 17, Dex 11, Con 12, Int 8, Wis 7, Cha 6
Skills: Appraise -1, Balancce 0, Bluff -2, Climb +3, Concentration +1, Decipher Script -2, Diplomacy -2, Disguise -2, Escape Artist 0, Forgery -2, Gather Information -2, Handle Animal -2, Heal -1, Hide 0, Intimidate -2 (+3 when using STR based demonstraion of toughness and scaryness), Knowledge (Arcana) 0, Knowledge (Local) 0, Knowledge (History) 0, Knowledge (Religion) 0, Knowledge (The Planes) 0,Listen -2, Move Silently -1, Open Lock 0, Perform -2, Ride 0, Search -2, Sense Motive -2, Sleight of Hand 0, Spellcaraft -2, Spot -2, Survival -1, Swim +3, Tumble 0, Use Rope 0
Feats:Extra Skills I mean: Open-Minded
Environment: Temperate hills
Organization: Gang (2-4), squad (11-20 plus 2 3rd-level sergeants and 1 leader
of 3rd-6th level), or band (30-100 plus 150% noncombatants plus
1 3rd-level sergeant per 10 adults, 5 5th-level lieutenants, and
3 7th-level captains)
Challenge Rating: ½
Treasure: Standard
Alignment: Often chaotic evil
Advancement: By character class
Level Adjustment: +0
GROK the Orc: This shorter than normal (5' 6&45/46" tall) and slight (123 6/7lbs) orc is ugly, squinty and (lucky bugger) never puts on any weight when he eats pies, drinks beer or after pub curries. He has blue eyes and lives in a quaint little 2 bedroom semi-detached dwelling in Waterdeep (23a Rotgut Lane, The Northern Docks, The Docks, Waterdeep, Faerun). His favourite passtimes are arm wrestling, pig wrangling, reading bad orcish poetry and watching reality TV shows. His favourite colour is red, his favourite song is the annoying one that was the theme tune for titanic and his favourite movie is the Austen Powers series (he especially likes the line 'no one thinks of the henchmen's family'). His best friend, Grog, thinks that reality TV shows are really lame and so he often doesn't watch them and goes to the pub instead. Grok and Grog are often seen together, hand in hand, among the most slovenly inns in Waterdeep's notorious Dock district.
Grok often (i.e. all the time, they are his only clothes) dresses in green moleskin trousers (made from fluffy sewer rats) and a brown homespun tunic. In his trousers left pocket is a small stone with a little bit of grey marbling effect on it and in his right pocket there are........I could go on but no one really reads this 3E non combat rubbish anyway, do they? What for, it is irrelevant to Grok's 1 round life span FFS, why do I bother? I don't know, WotC pays a pittance, my wife is having an affair........I am just going to end it all
Size/Type: Medium Humanoid (Orc)
Hit Dice: 1d8+1 (5 hp)
Initiative: +0
Speed: 30 ft. (6 squares)
Armor Class: 13 (+3 studded leather armor), touch 10, flat-footed 13
Base Attack/Grapple: +1/+4
Attack: Falchion +4 melee (2d4+4/18-20) or javelin +1 ranged (1d6+3)
Full Attack: Falchion +4 melee (2d4+4/18-20) or javelin +1 ranged (1d6+3)
Space/Reach: 5 ft./5 ft.
Special Attacks: —
Special Qualities: Darkvision 60 ft., light sensitivity
Saves: Fort +3, Ref +0, Will -2
Abilities: Str 17, Dex 11, Con 12, Int 8, Wis 7, Cha 6
Skills: Appraise -1, Balancce 0, Bluff -2, Climb +3, Concentration +1, Decipher Script -2, Diplomacy -2, Disguise -2, Escape Artist 0, Forgery -2, Gather Information -2, Handle Animal -2, Heal -1, Hide 0, Intimidate -2 (+3 when using STR based demonstraion of toughness and scaryness), Knowledge (Arcana) 0, Knowledge (Local) 0, Knowledge (History) 0, Knowledge (Religion) 0, Knowledge (The Planes) 0,Listen -2, Move Silently -1, Open Lock 0, Perform -2, Ride 0, Search -2, Sense Motive -2, Sleight of Hand 0, Spellcaraft -2, Spot -2, Survival -1, Swim +3, Tumble 0, Use Rope 0
Feats:
Environment: Temperate hills
Organization: Gang (2-4), squad (11-20 plus 2 3rd-level sergeants and 1 leader
of 3rd-6th level), or band (30-100 plus 150% noncombatants plus
1 3rd-level sergeant per 10 adults, 5 5th-level lieutenants, and
3 7th-level captains)
Challenge Rating: ½
Treasure: Standard
Alignment: Often chaotic evil
Advancement: By character class
Level Adjustment: +0
GROK the Orc: This shorter than normal (5' 6&45/46" tall) and slight (123 6/7lbs) orc is ugly, squinty and (lucky bugger) never puts on any weight when he eats pies, drinks beer or after pub curries. He has blue eyes and lives in a quaint little 2 bedroom semi-detached dwelling in Waterdeep (23a Rotgut Lane, The Northern Docks, The Docks, Waterdeep, Faerun). His favourite passtimes are arm wrestling, pig wrangling, reading bad orcish poetry and watching reality TV shows. His favourite colour is red, his favourite song is the annoying one that was the theme tune for titanic and his favourite movie is the Austen Powers series (he especially likes the line 'no one thinks of the henchmen's family'). His best friend, Grog, thinks that reality TV shows are really lame and so he often doesn't watch them and goes to the pub instead. Grok and Grog are often seen together, hand in hand, among the most slovenly inns in Waterdeep's notorious Dock district.
Grok often (i.e. all the time, they are his only clothes) dresses in green moleskin trousers (made from fluffy sewer rats) and a brown homespun tunic. In his trousers left pocket is a small stone with a little bit of grey marbling effect on it and in his right pocket there are........I could go on but no one really reads this 3E non combat rubbish anyway, do they? What for, it is irrelevant to Grok's 1 round life span FFS, why do I bother? I don't know, WotC pays a pittance, my wife is having an affair........I am just going to end it all
Last edited:
Olgar Shiverstone
Legend
Is eating a pie an at-will, encounter, or daily maneuver? Does it require a save for echanting flavor?
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