I've swung back and forth on this a lot over the years, but yeah, there are a lot of people with whom I otherwise agree with on most things who just can't seem to be okay with just liking things. Like, let people enjoy things.
There's definitely nuance in the areas between "liking problematic stuff" and "supporting literal real-world villains" but there's only so much power in individual level consumer decisions.
Absolutely a lot of nuance. But for me the line is actively causing or able to actively cause harm. That and literal Nazis.
If the author is dead, they can't actively harm anyone with whatever money I spend on their stuff. If the author is alive, then they can actively harm people with whatever money I spend...so I don't. At least not directly. Libraries still pay for books. When old copies wear out, they buy new ones...so checking out their work from the library still funds them. But buying second hand doesn't. So that's where I go.
The big places this pops up for me is Lovecraft, the OSR, and anime/manga/etc.
I love H.P. Lovecraft's writing, despite the fact that he was a virulent racist even for his time. But he's been dead and gone for a long time. Me buying his books isn't going to cause harm to anyone.
Unfortunately, there are some literal Nazis in the OSR scene, so, despite loving the aesthetic, I have to be hyper-vigilant about giving my money to people in that arena. And there are way too many people who use "there's only so much I can do" as an excuse to give a pass to literal real-world villains. That's where the "defending and becoming an apologist" came from. There's way, way, way too much of that in the OSR.
I recently dove head first into the anime, manga, and light novel series Mushoku Tensei. I got that the MC was an absolute creep from the start...but apparently he gets worse as the story goes on and the author goes to some really dark places later in the story and has even recently defended some of the incredibly problematic elements of the story. I still love the thing and I'll still read it. But I'm switching up from buying the light novels new to buying them used.