My thoughts
Here are my thoughts on this topic (for whatever they're worth). Primarily, the players need to meet the DM half way. Does this mean they can't be scared or annoyed? Not at all (in fact those kind of details can add great dimension to a game), but if every adventure is an absolute chore to get them involved, then something, IMO, is very wrong. Many times I have sat back an wondered why the hell does this character/group adventure? Players should make characters who will WANT to take chances (eventually if not immediately). Also, at some point the party as a whole has to decide to be proactive. Otherwise you get the player equivalent of DM railroading - PCs that must be led by the nose. Which can lead to an equally boring campaign death.
When I am playing, I always sit back and consider my character concept. If the character would make a better NPC (because he's too weird, too anti-social, too location dependant, or too abrasive) then I adapt or start over. All too often players can make characters with no thought of the GROUP (that includes the play group as well as the in game party). Compared to the work the DM must put in, a little forethought and effort from the players isn't too much to ask.
With that being said, I would agree (to an extent) with the others that mentioned making the hook somewhat more personally engaging. The provided example wasn't bad at all if the PCs were more proactive. Perhaps a little more of a push would've worked better. With the above example I would have had some part of the hook spill in on the PCs. Something like the door to their cabin/section bursts open admitting a bloodied sailor running from whatever. That way they HAVE to do something. Personally, I've always been leery of using PCs backgrounds against them. Do it too much and surprise-surprise they start making orphans. And that's if you get a developed background.
IMO I think ultimately you should do what you've done, talk with the players and figure our what kind of game everyone (including yourself) want. If it's too difficult to get the PCs into an adventure ask (in a non-confrontational way) what it will take and even if the players really want to game. All too often people are too nice to say what they think. Anyway, thanks for reading.