When a game session goes horribly wrong

[Spirynth]

Don't worry, this isn't an "I'm done with D&D because the new addition's different" thread.

No, what I mean is: Sometimes events during a game session can get to a point where you just have to say, "That's it! I'm pulling the plug right here, right now!"

Last night was such a session. And I am partially at fault for NOT doing the right thing.

I've got a small group of friends with whom I've been playing RP games. I was enthused about the new 4th Edition D&D, and they had agreed to get together one night a week to play it. Since its new, we've been doing a few special "Tutorial" sessions with a pool of pre-built characters until the players felt they had enough of a handle to build their own. The previous sessions went okay, if a bit slower than I'd hoped.

Last night, however, things broke down.

First error: at the start of the night, one player - let us call her "the UNhappy one" - told me "I'm not sure I want to play tonight..." and why. There are some issues outside in real life that had her, well "UNhappy." They aren't really new, but she felt they were recently more "UNhappy" than normal. I heard the words. I understood the language. ...but I didn't take her at her word. I thought, "she's just in her semi-regular funk - she'll come out of it once we get rolling..." So, I went right on ahead with the planned evening's game.

My fault. I should have folded everything up right then, taken it all back out to the car, and called the night's game off. I didn't. I'd put a lot of work and time into preparing for the game - I really wanted it to go well. I was selfishly indulgent.

We got the pizza, and began the game. From the get-go it was a train wreck. The other players were actually getting into it, trying to grasp the new rules, trying to be creative in their play. "The UNhappy one," however, was not.

With every word, gesture, and action, she was radiating utter anti-fun, anti-participatory, 100% negativity. Grump, sigh, grimace, angry miniature move, and "I attack that one." ...and it was as if she could no longer read English, as she would point to the most plainly written character ability on her character sheet and say, "I don't know what this means. What am I supposed to do?" (It was a really basic, simple, straight-forward attack - honestly) She'd roll, ...and miss. If anyone said ANYthing to her - good, bad, encouraging, joking, ANYthing at all - she was pointedly prickly in response.

Second error: after an hour and half of this - did I stop the game and address the issue? No. No, I didn't. I shook my head, rolled my eyes, and pushed on.

Third, fourth, fifth error: as this behavior continued throughout the evening, did I ever see the painfully obvious signs and finally stop the game and address the issue - or at least spare the group further suffering? No. Again, no, I did not. I pushed on.

The other players rolled their eyes, tried to offer game play help. And took venomous blows for the effort.

Did I address the issue? Nope. Not me. I pushed on.

I will admit - the other players managed to, despite it all, find a slightly clever solution to the in-game encounter - by finding the weak-link in the band of Goblins and bribing it to help them turn the tribe against their former leader.

And, of course, "the UNhappy one" did everything in her character's power to fail that plan.

IN the end, the other players literally had their characters interpose themselves and attack "the UNhappy one's" character to allow the last couple of helpful-turncoat Goblins to flee to safety.

The encounter ended.

The worst of the horror was over.

So, I say, "Gee, it seems you were pretty UNhappy tonight?"

She replies. "What? No, I wasn't unhappy - this Cleric is just not what I expected, is all. I was expecting a more 'Battle-capable' Cleric. This one's too much of a 'stand in the back and heal' Cleric." (totally untrue by the way - the pre-made cleric I'd built was quite battle-capable AND heal-capable, thank you very much... not that it mattered)

One of the other players looked at her sheet and suggested an ability or tow she could have used. "I tried that," she said, "I rolled and I missed, so it was useless." The other players gave up trying to help.

By this time, one of the other players announces that he has a night class starting next week, so we'll have to change to a new night. Another player says he's going out of town to visit an ailing relative. "The UNhappy one" huffs at this, "well! That kills it for me - this was the only night I could be here!"

I stammer, "...well, we'll figure something out..." But I can see in their eyes - this was the last time we'll ever play.

...

I'm an idiot. No, no - really. I'm an idiot. The signs were there all along. They were written in big, bold letters... on a cricket bat. ...and I was smacked in the face with them, multiple times. And still, I ignored them.

Sure, if "the UNhappy one" was THAT "UNhappy," she, too, should have just stopped, got up from the table and left. But that does NOT release me from guilt at my complete and utter lack of wisdom.

The signs were there, all around me, and I ignored them. I'm an idiot. I so very wanted to make this game work, that I drove it right into an obvious brick wall.

I'm an idiot.

If I can offer YOU anything from this tale of woe, its this: Don't be an idot like me. If one of your players smacks you repeatedly in the face with a cricket bat that says "I'm NOT having a good time!" - well, you might just want to pay attention to them.

 

[billd91]

Silver lining: if a change in date make the game impossible for the UNhappy camper, let it make that game impossible for her. One less game-derailing problem player is one less game-derailing problem player.
If you still value her as a player (when less UNhappy), and you have the time, find a way to have another game for her to participate in (though obviously without the player who has the class).
Just keep in mind, if her UNhappiness can sink this session (and possibly campaign), it can sink another unless resolved in some way. Either the source must be resolved or you have to have some arrangement with her that she doesn't bring her mood to the table.

 

[Grimstaff]

One must wonder if the other players really had "other things" to do next week, or if they just didn't want to risk another session with Ms. UNhappy.

 

[Evilusion]

OK my games that never survive were Mutants and MasterMinds 1st and 2nd edition. Boils down to me having too players who min max everything. Needless to say 1 session I was done.

 

[OchreJelly]

I think you are blaming yourself too much. All it takes is one person’s negativity to start sucking the fun out of the game – heck that extends to any social situation, hence the term “party pooper”. You’re the GM but you are not responsible for other people’s actions. She is responsible and it sounds like she was behaving immaturely. If you had tried to deal with it at the table you would probably being feeding into the “pity party” so that wouldn’t have been much help. If she legitimately didn’t like the character than she should have broached that topic sooner, or at least handled it differently. That would have been the mature thing to do. I

I have been in similar instances with players. Not so much being moody, but getting angry from not understanding the rules, or even bringing personal anger to the table. That kind negativity has a similar impact, but my players and myself don’t try to feed the mentality but rather deflect it and move on. Deflect how? Often it’s as simple as goofing around and joking about something that player finds funny, or finding a way to give that character a moment to shine helps. Once the person realizes no one is going to pander to their needs, it usually is enough to adjust their attitude. If they truly need a friend to talk to, well… there’s a time and a place for that too, just not at the game table.

 

[Obryn]

Why didn't the unhappy player just leave and let you run the game with everyone else? Am I missing something? Do you only have 2 players?

-O

 

[S'mon]

My fault. I should have folded everything up right then, taken it all back out to the car, and called the night's game off.

No, you should have said:

"That's ok, you can play next time if you're feeling better" and ran the game for the other players.

Her unreadiness to play was no reason to dump the session (unless eg she was suicidal and needed immediate attention). Likewise, the bad session was no reason to end the game. You've lost her due to her bad behaviour but you should reschedule on a different night with the others. They don't hate your guts, right?