D&D General Which Aspect of DMing Do you Struggle Most With?

[Quickleaf]

I struggle with pacing the most.

We have 3 hours to play – When do I speed things up by excluding / limiting details or encouraging the players along? What signs do I look for that this would be a good time to slow things down and indulge in more detail? When do I play fast and loose with the rules? When do I narrate the end up combat vs. let them fight to the last Hit Point? When do I let them ruminate and see what their creativity can summon up vs. when do I reinforce / repeat / reintroduce a clue? How do I hit that sweet spot so that by the time our session is up we've reached some kind of a satisfying conclusion or stopping point? How do I balance my desire to cover "a lot of narrative ground" with the players' desires to go deep down the rabbit hole of analysis & detail (or alternatively flights of fancy unrelated to the story)?

Pacing is really elusive. Players know when it feels right because there's a sense of flow and dynamism, multiple bases are being hit (in terms of the players' interests / three pillars of play), and the excitement builds in a natural ebb and flow. But it's fragile, and I find myself often trying to get the pacing back or looking for natural opportunities to help the pacing along. Even the most skilled, respectful, and enjoyable players can have a tendency to prioritize their character interests or a particular whim over a sense of pacing. That's the DM's job – in my view – to hold that mindfulness about pacing so the players can enjoy cutting loose and being in the "cockpit" of their characters. It's just really tricky for me to get right.

P.S. One of my favorite D&D YouTubers, Zipperon Disney, did a presentation on Pacing for DMs that I found really valuable:

 

[jdrakeh]

Unique character voices. I used to try very hard to give each NPC a unique voice. After years of trying and failing to do a good job at this, I don't bother anymore. I may change the tone/pitch of my voice, but I don't bother with accents and such.

 

[Malmuria]

I struggle with pacing the most.

We have 3 hours to play – When do I speed things up by excluding / limiting details or encouraging the players along? What signs do I look for that this would be a good time to slow things down and indulge in more detail? When do I play fast and loose with the rules? When do I narrate the end up combat vs. let them fight to the last Hit Point? When do I let them ruminate and see what their creativity can summon up vs. when do I reinforce / repeat / reintroduce a clue? How do I hit that sweet spot so that by the time our session is up we've reached some kind of a satisfying conclusion or stopping point? How do I balance my desire to cover "a lot of narrative ground" with the players' desires to go deep down the rabbit hole of analysis & detail (or alternatively flights of fancy unrelated to the story)?

Pacing is really elusive. Players know when it feels right because there's a sense of flow and dynamism, multiple bases are being hit (in terms of the players' interests / three pillars of play), and the excitement builds in a natural ebb and flow. But it's fragile, and I find myself often trying to get the pacing back or looking for natural opportunities to help the pacing along. Even the most skilled, respectful, and enjoyable players can have a tendency to prioritize their character interests or a particular whim over a sense of pacing. That's the DM's job – in my view – to hold that mindfulness about pacing so the players can enjoy cutting loose and being in the "cockpit" of their characters. It's just really tricky for me to get right.

P.S. One of my favorite D&D YouTubers, Zipperon Disney, did a presentation on Pacing for DMs that I found really valuable:

Pacing is hard, especially for online play. If you think about the pacing of a dungeon crawl it's very slow and methodical, with the pcs describing every last thing that they do. But if you are not in a dungeon, that mode does not work as well. As a player, I appreciate when a dm just skips over the less important stuff.

 

[cmad1977]

Confidence.

Before every session I'm second-guessing every single decision and thought process I've ever had about my talent as a DM. I am testing out accents and voices and hating them. And that last 30 minutes before the game starts before I get on the call before I sit down with friends... It's everything I can do not to call everyone and tell them that I have died and therefore must regretfully cancel the session.

And then during the game everything's pretty much fine. Because every time I do a stupid accent or a ridiculous voice or air some plot line that I've second-guessed four or five times everyone seems to eat it up.

And then at the end of the session everyone's laughing and happy or heartbroken and happy and telling me what a good DM I am or what parts of the session they particularly liked or high-fiving or complaining about some minor problem and I explain more about that problem and then they're happy about what happened... And I'm delighted on everything is right with the world.

And then 2 hours later I'm wondering why they lie to me so much about enjoying my games which are clearly garbage.

I've been playing D&D for around 30 years. It has never changed in that regard.

You stole my story.

 

[77IM]

Pacing.

 

[pukunui]

Intrigue type stuff

 

[Reynard]

This subject comes up regularly and for me it is always the same answer: remembering and recording all the random stuff I make up in any given session, since I do A LOT of improv during play.

 

[Stormonu]

I very much can empathize with the feelings of Imposter Syndrome, I battle with it in many parts of my life, not just DMing. Prior to games are extremely anxious times and after games are extremely depressive, despite any kudos I might get. During the game, I do fairly well and am having too much fun to worry about whether I'm doing a good job or not.

Likewise, high level play gives me ulcers. I just can't get into D&D games past about 12th level or so. It becomes Avenger level threats and superheroics that I just can't quite wrap my head around. I like my games on the gritty side in the 3rd-5th level range best where characters are skilled, but not overwhelmingly powerful. Just about every monster and scenario is a threat.

 

[hopeless]

Intrigue type stuff

Do your players try bringing this up?
So far I've left that to evolve with the game I initially didn't expect more than a couple of sessions, but it got to the stage I felt like I was stretching things trying to keep up.
Must have done a good enough job as it encouraged the other dm in the group I was involved in back then that he thought he could co-opt the setting despite the fact that wasn't possible but he wasn't interested in asking before grabbing!

 

[Minigiant]

Post session organization.

I often have to plan the next session with incomplete info of the previous one. So I never remember the random NPCs, items,and details I creates.