LogicsFate
First Post
K sits somewhere, happily enough, and why not? It's be a good day. No, no, with the body count, it's been a great day!
K sits somewhere smiling, off in her own world.
K sits somewhere smiling, off in her own world.
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Tales From The Old Bald One-Eyed Salty Red Dog Tavern! (chapter 1, now closed)
- Thread starter Lazlow
- Start date
Lazlow
First Post
Al watches and listens to Ranti rant on with a bored look on his face. "Yes, yes, filleting, fine," he says, waving him to his seat.
"Now. You're looking for the Chromium Orb of Frobozz, eh? Well, first of all, you'll never find it. No one's ever found it, and there is much debate over whether it still exists at all. Secondly, even if it DOES exist, you'll never get past the Guardian. No one ever passes the Guardian, and there is much debate over whether the Guardian would even let those worthy enough for the Orb to pass. Legend has it the Guardian was fickle, yes.
"Thirdly," Al continued, scooching sideways in his chair so that both of his legs dangled off one of the arms, and putting his hands behind his head, "there is so little information on the Orb that it would take years and years of dedicated research to even find vague hints as to its possible whereabouts." He sits up suddenly. "But you're in luck. Because I just so happened to do just that thing. Wasted years and years of my life, I did, all for a wild goose chase, in my humble opinion."
At this point the hurried sound of slightly wet flesh slapping on stones announces the arrival of Al's homonculous, bearing a tray laden with a silver teapot and several small cups. The creature sets the tray down on the table and pours a cup for all of you. Setting the pot down, he rolls under the table, under Al's chair, and finally out the door.
"Please, it's quite good. Will do wonders for your wounds there, too, my good elf."
"Now. You're looking for the Chromium Orb of Frobozz, eh? Well, first of all, you'll never find it. No one's ever found it, and there is much debate over whether it still exists at all. Secondly, even if it DOES exist, you'll never get past the Guardian. No one ever passes the Guardian, and there is much debate over whether the Guardian would even let those worthy enough for the Orb to pass. Legend has it the Guardian was fickle, yes.
"Thirdly," Al continued, scooching sideways in his chair so that both of his legs dangled off one of the arms, and putting his hands behind his head, "there is so little information on the Orb that it would take years and years of dedicated research to even find vague hints as to its possible whereabouts." He sits up suddenly. "But you're in luck. Because I just so happened to do just that thing. Wasted years and years of my life, I did, all for a wild goose chase, in my humble opinion."
At this point the hurried sound of slightly wet flesh slapping on stones announces the arrival of Al's homonculous, bearing a tray laden with a silver teapot and several small cups. The creature sets the tray down on the table and pours a cup for all of you. Setting the pot down, he rolls under the table, under Al's chair, and finally out the door.
"Please, it's quite good. Will do wonders for your wounds there, too, my good elf."
Gray Shade
First Post
Berserker Bill sips at the tea, pointing his pinky high in the air as he seems to think is good manners.
"Thank you, yes, quite good." He continues to hold his tiny cup of tea.
"All right. Now, may we ask questions and be taken seriously, or are you going to 'yes, yes' us?" With the 'yes, yes' he imitates Al's wave to Ranti. Before Al can answer, he continues, "I don't think the Guardian will be a problem. If you know where the Orb is, please tell us so that we may be on our way, and take up no more of your time."
"Thank you, yes, quite good." He continues to hold his tiny cup of tea.
"All right. Now, may we ask questions and be taken seriously, or are you going to 'yes, yes' us?" With the 'yes, yes' he imitates Al's wave to Ranti. Before Al can answer, he continues, "I don't think the Guardian will be a problem. If you know where the Orb is, please tell us so that we may be on our way, and take up no more of your time."
Lazlow
First Post
"Oh, you don't think the Guardian will be a problem, eh?" Al repeats, almost mockingly. "My good Sheriff, do you even know what the Guardian is? Some say that it is a creature of unimaginable power. Some say that it is the living embodiment of the Orb itself. Still others say that it permeates the very place in which the Orb is housed." He looks off into space, a bit absently and continues, "Of course, there is that one guy who said the Guardian was just some guy with a melon, but what that's supposed to mean, I have no idea..."
He snaps his fingers and a rolled-up parchment appears in his hands. "Okay. I have to admit, you've piqued my interest in this all over again. But I am far too busy nowadays to go off gallavanting all over creation to follow the leads - and besides, I'd hate to waste another several years on what will most likely turn out to be a wild goose chase anyway. So I give this to you on one condition: If any of you survive, and there IS some truth to any of this, just come back and tell me about it, okay? If you don't find anything, I don't want to know."
He stands and hands the scroll to K. "There you are young lady, be sure to keep these... Gentlemen... In line, won't you? There's a good lass. Now, if there's nothing else...? Very well then. As I said, I'm a busy man. Let me walk you out."
<POOOFFF!!!>
With a huge puff of smoke, you all find yourselves outside Al's house once again.
============
OOC: Here endeth chapter 1! See the OOC thread for important info.
He snaps his fingers and a rolled-up parchment appears in his hands. "Okay. I have to admit, you've piqued my interest in this all over again. But I am far too busy nowadays to go off gallavanting all over creation to follow the leads - and besides, I'd hate to waste another several years on what will most likely turn out to be a wild goose chase anyway. So I give this to you on one condition: If any of you survive, and there IS some truth to any of this, just come back and tell me about it, okay? If you don't find anything, I don't want to know."
He stands and hands the scroll to K. "There you are young lady, be sure to keep these... Gentlemen... In line, won't you? There's a good lass. Now, if there's nothing else...? Very well then. As I said, I'm a busy man. Let me walk you out."
<POOOFFF!!!>
With a huge puff of smoke, you all find yourselves outside Al's house once again.
============
OOC: Here endeth chapter 1! See the OOC thread for important info.
Gray Shade
First Post
"Well," Berserker Bill says, waving away any lingering smoke puffs.
He looks at the scroll in K's hand. "What's it say?"
He looks at the scroll in K's hand. "What's it say?"
I look around with eyes of a person just waking up. I look for the cup of tea in my hand...
Shouting "You...You....You...Maladjusted Misanthrope. We demand that you assist us in a more physical manner. We defeated these dreadful savage..."
I look around, see all the blood and proceed to dislodge the contents of my stomach onto the surrounding terrain.
A little less green himself and a little lower in decible "I think that you owe us new outfits or at least a repair on the current batch. I also think that you should offer us a choice of fine foods and drinks to take with us on our way..."
I vomit again
"And a set of replacement clothes for the wear and tear that these will see. Or at least a set of masterwork craftsman tailor tools so that I can repair them in our down time. I also think that you owe us a rest and a nice place to recouperate for the evening. Barring that I think we will proclaim loud and long that you are a fraud, a trickster, a shyster, and a sesqidedalian. I also will curse you in the name of the god 'Seerloin O' Beif', may the victuals that you consume turn into a mass of writhing maggots and that drink that you partake of become like fouled privy water.."
I vomit again
I turn to the group...
"Mr. Sherriff Lord and master the Honourable Venerable Berzerker Bill sir, we need to get more information. I think we need a nice big city with a library and a bath house and steam rooms and a 'House of Less Than Honourable Persuits' should be our next stop. I feel the need to do some research and practice for the task ahead of us."
I proceed to walk past the bodies looking into the air and trying to ignore the blood. Turning a bit more green the whole time until I pass them.
Shouting "You...You....You...Maladjusted Misanthrope. We demand that you assist us in a more physical manner. We defeated these dreadful savage..."
I look around, see all the blood and proceed to dislodge the contents of my stomach onto the surrounding terrain.
A little less green himself and a little lower in decible "I think that you owe us new outfits or at least a repair on the current batch. I also think that you should offer us a choice of fine foods and drinks to take with us on our way..."
I vomit again
"And a set of replacement clothes for the wear and tear that these will see. Or at least a set of masterwork craftsman tailor tools so that I can repair them in our down time. I also think that you owe us a rest and a nice place to recouperate for the evening. Barring that I think we will proclaim loud and long that you are a fraud, a trickster, a shyster, and a sesqidedalian. I also will curse you in the name of the god 'Seerloin O' Beif', may the victuals that you consume turn into a mass of writhing maggots and that drink that you partake of become like fouled privy water.."
I vomit again
I turn to the group...
"Mr. Sherriff Lord and master the Honourable Venerable Berzerker Bill sir, we need to get more information. I think we need a nice big city with a library and a bath house and steam rooms and a 'House of Less Than Honourable Persuits' should be our next stop. I feel the need to do some research and practice for the task ahead of us."
I proceed to walk past the bodies looking into the air and trying to ignore the blood. Turning a bit more green the whole time until I pass them.
LogicsFate
First Post
K looks pained as the wizard hands her the scroll
K pauses, thinking of ways not to have to look for the OoF, failing that, she notices something else "Hey look" K points to the other side of the room "Wizard guy is back" Taking a chance in the distraction, she grabs and breaks off the arrow that has been so comfortable lodged in Richards helm for the past few minutes.
"Guess I was wrong, hey look!" She says as she unfurls the scroll
"Short and pleasant,Short and pleasant,Short and pleasant,Short and pleasant"whispers K loudly, as she reads the scroll
K pauses, thinking of ways not to have to look for the OoF, failing that, she notices something else "Hey look" K points to the other side of the room "Wizard guy is back" Taking a chance in the distraction, she grabs and breaks off the arrow that has been so comfortable lodged in Richards helm for the past few minutes.
"Guess I was wrong, hey look!" She says as she unfurls the scroll
"Short and pleasant,Short and pleasant,Short and pleasant,Short and pleasant"whispers K loudly, as she reads the scroll
Last edited:
LogicsFate
First Post
As K's eye move down the parchment, she's upswept in the mood and begins to whistle silly songs.
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