As for the food... While I agree it's something I wouldn't use in my games; is it really all that much difefrent then say the mechanics of a healing potion?
Since we can explain one by magic it's suddenly perfectly valid? (Even though the D&D world is filled with things that could in no way shape or form be true in our own real world?)
Really I guess my thought is the answer to his comment is: No in this game food does not have a healing effect. It's not a videogame no videogame thing in my opinion. It's just a question of mechanics.
In one game that he played people can heal damage to their hit points (a nebulous only half heartedly explained idea) with food. In the game that you were running they could only heal damaged hit points (a nebulous only half heartedly explained idea) through other means.
Back in my 2E campaigns, we used various mechanics for healing - potions (uncommon, not able to be bought, but healed alot fast), herbs (common, able to be bought, but only healed a little and couldn't be used more than once an encounter), wands (nobody ever got one of these), spells (fairly common, go to the local cleric for a miracle) and sleeping at an inn (a little better than an herb). Can't say we ever used food, but probably just because we already had four or five other methods - not because food's necessarily a bad idea. I *do* remember always starving to death in Ultima Exodus for 8-bit Nintendo. Maybe that left a bad taste in my mouth (har har).
Anyway, seems to me that as long as the group agrees to use mechanics that are relatively logically consistent with how it conceptualizes HP, then all's well. I could see HP being very abstract, maybe representing just weariness and stamina until zero, when it represented a fatal wound or something. In that system, you could easily just use rest, food and herbs to heal.
I'd tend to use whatever HP conception and healing mechanic fit the setting I wanted to evoke. If I'm low-magic, then we're doing stamina and food/inn healing. If we're high-magic, then maybe we're using actual physical, bloody wounds and potions/spells.
Edit: Incidentally, I'm playing in a 4E campaign now, but I haven't had any issues with the second wind or healing surge mechanic, largely because of the approach I mention above. It all boils down to the DM and players agreeing to "skin" the mechanic in a way that suits their setting, I suppose.
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