The abstraction some people dont often get is all those descriptions are perfectly valid representations of either "hitting" (game term) with the bat or "missing" (game term) and still doing damage.
Yeah. A Miss line is just a "clumsy hit" in real world terms - or it can be.
Plus they indicate that damage isn't necessarily purely a physical countdown in DnD anymore, it can represent morale/determination/loyalty/etc as well as physical health now (why things like Invigorating powers can give THP, as they can be looked at as boosting the PCs morale and drive to succeed).
This also gives an answer to "How do you do damage to a person with a baseball bat without hitting him?"
You swung so hard at his friend that you scared the daylights out of him, and he is a few morale points (as represented by his HP total) closer to just calling it quits. (as how cleave damages the adjacent enemy but doesn't hit them).