D&D 5E Evil Necromancer Monologue

[Balfore]

An evil Necromancer is about to meet the PCs.
His plan was to allow the PCs to kill every cultist in multiple temples, and then gather the dead unto him for raising... including a few extra dead things.
His army of undead is between him and the PCs.
He has the parent of 2 of the PCs bound and elevated dozens of feet in the air.
He has had hundreds of years to plan for this moment...
He begins his monologue....

....what does he say?

Sent from my SM-N910V using Tapatalk

 

[Shiroiken]

"You probably expect me to monologue, but this isn't that kind of story." Orders undead to attack.

 

[Caliban]

"The time has come to pay for your sins! You who have been the bane of my existence, you who made my life a living hell. They say revenge is a dish best served cold, and I'm about to have my fill of it! Decades of planning, years of work, countless lives sacrificed, all to bring us to this moment! You will rue the day that you crossed me! Now, finally, you will pay for your actions that day, so long ago, when we were children in the sandbox and you pushed my face in the sand and made me eat worms!"

 

[Fleetwood C. DeVille]

"Infidel defilers! You will all drown in lakes of blood. Now you will know why you are afraid of the dark. Now you will learn why you fear the night....."

 

[wicked cool]

" When you are dead I will add you to my army"

 

[Nagol]

"We'll talk after you're dead!"

 

[Sithikurro]

Perhaps he is a cold, logical one:
"Here are the facts: a) I have a hostage, someone dear to you. b) I have an army of undead you helped me built c) you are completely outmatched
Thus, you have only one choice left: join me, or die. Oh wait. The other way round: die and join me!"

 

[Gardens & Goblins]

''Now, mortal, this is the story all about how
My life got flipped, turned upside down
And I'd like to take a minute just sit right there
I'll tell you how I became the DARK LORD OF ALL EVIL of the REALM OF DYING DREAMS

In ETERNAL DARKNESS born and raised
On the FIELDS OF STRIFE where I spent most of my days
Chilling out, maxing, relaxing all cool
And all SACRIFICING INNOCENTS outside of the DARK CITADEL
When a couple of ADVENTURES who were up to no good
Started making trouble in my CHAMBER OF SILENCE
I got in one little fight and my mom got scared
And said you're moving with your auntie and uncle in the REALM OF DYING DREAMS

I begged and pleaded with her the other day
But she packed my SCHOLAR'S PACK and sent me on my way
She gave me a MARK OF EVIL and she gave me my 3 COPPER PIECES
I put my EDGY HAT OF SOULS on and said I might as well kick it

First class, INFERNAL POTIONS, yo this is bad,
Drinking MAIDEN BLOOD out of a RAM'S SKULL.
Is this what the people of the REALM OF DYING DREAMS UNlivin' like
Hm this might be alright!

I whistled for a SPECTRAL STEED and when it came near the
THE HOODED AND BURNING EMBER EYED DRIVER'S ENCHANTED RING said 'Fresh' and had dice in its SKULL
If anything I could say that this SPECTRAL STEED was rare
But I thought now forget it, yo home to the REALM OF DYING DREAMS

I pulled up to a THE DARKER CITADEL about seven or eight
And I yelled to the THE HOODED AND BURNING EMBER EYED DRIVER', yo Holmes smell ya later
Looked at my kingdom I was finally there
To sit on my throne as the DARK LORD OF ALL EVIL of the REALM OF DYING DREAMS''

 

[Waterbizkit]

There once was a necromancer named Xed
His minions were vile undead
With great zeal and devotion
He'd set plans in motion
"Now let there be copious bloodshed!"

That's all you're getting from a phone post.

 

[Demorgus]

"Look upon the army you created for me. Look upon your loved one that I hold captive. For all of your heroism, I have gained power. And when you fall, I shall add your corpses to my legion. Despair, for today you meet your end."