D&D 5E Is my brother a problem player? Or am I just a bad DM?

[NotQuiteANoble]

Hello all. Before I dive into this, I want to make it clear that I don't know if the problem is actually the way I'm doing it.

The party consists of a Dragonborn Zealot Barb, an Aasimar Ancients Paladin, an Elf Scribe Wizard, and an Artificer turned Ki-Rin.

I picked up the game at level 13 after the resident DM quit. Without further ado...

Previously, the Artificer had built a 2D12(!) dealing hammer that could cast Haste and double strength for the damage modifier from the previous DM. The previous tried to nerf him, but went a little the other way to begin with, and the Artificer through a tantrum. After some arguments, the DM left. And guess who got to pick it up?

I've been running a game at Level 13, and am feeling really terrible about continuing it. The players(on their own accord) travelled to Avernus, and since I was really busy, decided that I would use Baldur's Gate: Descent into Avernus as a basis for the quest. They decided to go meet Bel, who was one of the player's patron(that player had left on terrible terms), and the Artificer refuse to leave, after refusing his deal. Bel released the Fire Giants, and the Paladin went straight for Bel. Bel usually wouldn't attack, unless threatened, and but the Paladin openly went for him. Bel destroyed him. After the fight went south quickly, the Wizard teleported everyone out.

The artificer began complaining that he wasn't as powerful as everybody, and asked me as the DM to make him more powerful. I ,in an attempt to avoid an argument, mentioned the scroll of True Polymorph(random drop from previous DM), and after some deliberation, he chose a Ki-Rin. Okay then... the group lacked a healer I guess?

They travelled to Arkhan's tower for the Barbarian's own quest, and after some things there, they encountered what was supposed to be the BBEG. He was with a few cronies that in total I thought was quite a hard fight. They crushed him. I posted before about this, and received some advice about his stat block(Thanks to all who helped). Anyway, they travelled to the person they were searching for(he had a magic watch that had the power over time). He had destroyed it after splintering himself through the timeline, and the players exited his base.

They encountered Kostchetchie(spelt that wrong for sure), and after destroying the Chain Devil and Hell Hounds, freed him. The Artfificer moaned that with his passive he would have been able to see them(didn't actually say if I had rolled stealth), but I thought that since these devils had the sole purpose of getting the jump on someone, they would know how to hide from people. Is that my fault for making a wrong call? Naturally I'm biased on it., and would love to hear your opinions.

Kost(not spelling it again ) led them to Zariel and for the second time in 4 sessions, picked a fight with an Archdevil. Something important to note, is that the Paladin had drawn the card on the Deck of Many that meant a devil hated him, and since he was an aasimar, I made it Zariel ahead of time(he is everything she used to be). The paladin flew up to Zariel and dealt to fairly good blows to her, before Zariel dropped him in one round. The Barb flew up to Zariel as his action(she had flown 120ft up), and the Wizard threw a Synaptic Static, since it already had Protection of Evil. And the Ki-Rin/Artificer complained that he was useless. The paladin at this point quietly began to make death saves. The Ki-rin shouted out to the sky that he wants help, and he doesn't care who gives it. Nothing happened immediately, and he got annoyed at me( I might make Bel appear towards the end, steal the glory and take the throne).

This morning, he spent half an hour shouting at me, saying that I don't care about how my players feel, and that is typical for how I treat people in general. I also favour others, because I'm a minmaxer and view the 18th level cleric as extremely useful despite having prepared spells he can't change apparently. I was not innocent in that argument, but it made me think.

We are playing again tonight(lots of sessions in a short period of time), and I'm afraid a TPK may occur and it'll be my fault, and that the Ki-Rin will suck the fun out, by correcting me at any point. Is it my fault if the party dies? I put Kost near the after all, and if they turned his offer down, they would likely never be in a good enough position to strike her again. How do I solve the definitely deadly encounter they are in(Kost has like 3 ranged attacks that he can do once each, so he's not that helpful).

I don't want to just kick someone out since they annoyed me, and he's my twin, so I can't really do that without an immense backlash. The dragonborn at the end of last session said that he was looking forward to the fight as well.

I'm just really stuck.

 

[Delazar]

When I read this kind of posts, I'm always curious to know also the "other side" of the story. If your brother could read this, what would he reply? In fact, maybe you should give him a link, and give him a chance to tell his side of the story.

From what I can read, yes, your brother sounds like a problem player. And I understand you don't want to just kick him from the game, he's fellow player, and he's your brother after all.

I would say "try and talk with him and the party, and find a solution together", but when you write "he spent half an hour shouting at me", well for me that's a 100% "sorry, you're not in this party anymore". No one has the right to shout at you, not even when (if) you're wrong.

I'm not a quitter, but if you're really really stuck, there's no dishonor in just saying "guys, this isn't really working for me, maybe better if someone else DMs".

I hope you find a solution soon, D&D is for having fun, not for feeling bad.

 

[NotQuiteANoble]

When I read this kind of posts, I'm always curious to know also the "other side" of the story. If your brother could read this, what would he reply? In fact, maybe you should give him a link, and give him a chance to tell his side of the story.

From what I can read, yes, your brother sounds like a problem player. And I understand you don't want to just kick him from the game, he's fellow player, and he's your brother after all.

I would say "try and talk with him and the party, and find a solution together", but when you write "he spent half an hour shouting at me", well for me that's a 100% "sorry, you're not in this party anymore". No one has the right to shout at you, not even when (if) you're wrong.

I'm not a quitter, but if you're really really stuck, there's no dishonor in just saying "guys, this isn't really working for me, maybe better if someone else DMs".

I hope you find a solution soon, D&D is for having fun, not for feeling bad.

Thanks for the advice. I'm afraid I said that to my party, and my brother took over for a session, but gave up very quickly. He doesn't know that I posted this, and would probably get mad about it if I told him.

 

[billd91]

Maybe it’s time to start over from scratch with a new campaign, a clean slate, so that everyone gets a fresh start, you’re not dealing with hold-over weirdness from the previous DM, and nobody can complain about previous favoritism.

 

[NotQuiteANoble]

Maybe it’s time to start over from scratch with a new campaign, a clean slate, so that everyone gets a fresh start, you’re not dealing with hold-over weirdness from the previous DM, and nobody can complain about previous favoritism.

Thanks for the advice. We currently have two games running, where the Barb runs Waterdeep. I'm afraid to say that his Bard(sigh) got in a fight with the new Barb in the first session, after he started a monologue in a stealth mission, drawing the Intellect Devourer to us.

 

[Umbran]

When I read this kind of posts, I'm always curious to know also the "other side" of the story. If your brother could read this, what would he reply? In fact, maybe you should give him a link, and give him a chance to tell his side of the story.

We should not be arbiters in a personal dispute. That we are told "both sides" of the story doesn't actually mean we have an accurate picture, especially if people are upset.

So, no, he shouldn't come here and tell his side of the story. That way lies more acrimony.

 

[NotQuiteANoble]

We should not be arbiters in a personal dispute. That we are told "both sides" of the story doesn't actually mean we have an accurate picture, especially if people are upset.

So, no, he shouldn't come here and tell his side of the story. That way lies more acrimony.

I understand that. But my question was not really to do with the 'personal dispute'. I wanted to know if people thought that continuing the game would be detrimental to the fun of my players, or that is may develop into something a lot worse, since I have little experience in these things

 

[jayoungr]

We are playing again tonight(lots of sessions in a short period of time), and I'm afraid a TPK may occur and it'll be my fault, and that the Ki-Rin will suck the fun out, by correcting me at any point. Is it my fault if the party dies? I put Kost near the after all, and if they turned his offer down, they would likely never be in a good enough position to strike her again. How do I solve the definitely deadly encounter they are in(Kost has like 3 ranged attacks that he can do once each, so he's not that helpful).

Do you roll in the open? Can you fudge the dice if needed to make sure they don't TPK? Not a solution for every situation, but with tensions running so high ....

Can you give them an ally, maybe another devil who's involved in the politics--someone who could give them a macguffin to make the fight easier, in exchange for a future favor? (You can end the game after this fight so the favor won't be a factor.)

If none of that is an option, then maybe ending the game is the way to go. Disappointing someone who was looking forward to it is probably the lesser evil here.

I would say "try and talk with him and the party, and find a solution together", but when you write "he spent half an hour shouting at me", well for me that's a 100% "sorry, you're not in this party anymore". No one has the right to shout at you, not even when (if) you're wrong.

To be fair, sometimes family is allowed to go further than players who aren't related to you. Depending on the family.

 

[NotQuiteANoble]

Do you roll in the open? Can you make sure they don't TPK? Not a solution for every situation, but with tensions running so high ....

Can you give them an ally, maybe another devil who's involved in the politics--someone who could give them a macguffin to make the fight easier, in exchange for a future favor? (You can end the game after this fight so the favor won't be a factor.)



To be fair, sometimes family is allowed to go further than players who aren't related to you. Depending on the family.

Thanks for the reply. I do roll in the open, since my players have to, so I just think it makes it fairer. Perhaps Tiamat could send Arkhan...

 

[Umbran]

I understand that. But my question was not really to do with the 'personal dispute'. I wanted to know if people thought that continuing the game would be detrimental to the fun of my players, or that is may develop into something a lot worse, since I have little experience in these things

That is entirely tied up in the relationship with the player(s) - so, it really is to do with the personal dispute, and whether it can be managed constructively.

My point was that while we can give broad advice based on our own experiences, our format does not suit actually working through the details of conflicting reports.

I personally think the simplest answer is to start a new campaign. Supporting the past choices of another GM can be hard, especially when they go a bit off the beaten track. Supporting high level play is also hard, if you aren't an experienced DM. Start fresh, and you don't have to worry about the questionable game balance choices someone else made.