Cool. Thanks for the info!
1A. Was there a fourth, or just the three of you?
1B. Could the mage (wizard??) counterspell, or attempt to?
2A. Splitting up is rarely a good tactic IMO, but that does depend a lot on the size of the party. Not knowing if there was more than three PCs, splitting up with just 3-4 PCs is very risky IME! While not being "grouped" might seem like a good idea, it also means you can't support each other as easily. The fact the other PCs didn't know you were down and dying is evidence of that happening.
2B. How was the spell the just caught you in the area placed? If the other two PCs were the targets and not you, it likely should of been centered between the two of them. If that happened to catch you, it happens. But, if the DM placed it so that it just caught you, but was not optimally placed for the other two, to me that reeks of abuse by the DM! Unless the BBEG knew where you were, which then of course it makes sense.
2C. Not knowing the spell or save, you were hiding behind a building. Did you gain any bonus to your save for cover?
I'm not as familiar with that subclass since it's in Tasha's. I see quickly from it that it should have had 55 hit points, so I guess it was already damaged?
Frankly, the summoned spirit seems a poor substitution for wild shaping yourself.
Also, a 10th-level Druid would have about 53 + 10 x CON mod hp. So, I guess you also were already injured badly? IME most PCs have CON 14, which would be 73 hp. So, even taking 52 points of damage normally wouldn't take you out.
Well, again, there is a lot I don't know of what is going on. One PC was a barbarian (I guess 10th-level?), probably raging, so 26 damage really should have been a major issue unless it was well into the fight and he was severely injured. Otherwise, why would he be trying to save himself from dying? If he was that injured, healing him might have been a better priority than concentrating on heat metal?
Again, on the surface, this sounds more like a side-effect of splitting up the party, which in this case seems to have been a tactical mistake.
Well, trying to avoid detection for what purpose? Was the party in such a sad state that you needed to hide during a BBEG battle?
As I said, being too passive can also lead to PC death, just like being too aggressive. The fact you were trading one for the other is immaterial since I wasn't there to see the event unfold.
So, during the rounds you were hiding you never called out, told others to watch out, or communicated in any way with the other PCs??? I mean, I agree players shouldn't share/declare information, but characters should be communicating with each other constantly.
After the uber-spell, neither of the other PCs, both blinded, felt the need to call out to make sure the others were still up? I mean, they can't see the others at that point, so finding out about the state of your allies seems like something they should have done. If they had, and you didn't answer, maybe they would have acted in time to save your PC?
Sorry, but this seems like you're saying the other PCs basically did nothing because they were blinded? I really hope that wasn't the case...
Being blind doesn't incapacitate you, but anyway I doubt there is any point in continuing this.
I stand by what I said. 90% or more of the time PC death isn't just "dumb luck" but usually due to a mistake or bad tactics or poor choices. Even if it is just bad luck, that is part of life and part of the game IMO.