Your Pizza Order

[Bedrockgames]

I xan eat it on a pizza but prefer it without. Free Hawaiian is free Hawaiian.

I don't mind it with egg and bacon in a burger.

The truth is pineapple pizza is delicious. But it is like the sweet sauce pizza. You don't want to order it every time and it is incredibly filling when you do. Like the sweet sauce the first several bites can be good but it grows less enjoyable after a certain point. Never order a Hawaiian without a plain cheese back up.

And while I think criticizing the Hawaiian is entirely fair, after all that is a lot of juicy sweetness to go with cheese, one thing that troubles me deeply is the hypocrisy of people who have the gall to attack pineapple on a pizza while thinking nothing about ordering a buffalo chicken pizza. Because if were are really being honest here, buffalo chicken pizza is maybe the single biggest insult to pizza since Ellio's Pizza opened its doors in 1963. Both the Buffalo Chicken and the Ellio's are clear evidence that New York isn't the innocent place it would have us believe when it is pointing its finger at Chicago.

 

[Ryujin]

The truth is pineapple pizza is delicious. But it is like the sweet sauce pizza. You don't want to order it every time and it is incredibly filling when you do. Like the sweet sauce the first several bites can be good but it grows less enjoyable after a certain point. Never order a Hawaiian without a plain cheese back up.

And while I think criticizing the Hawaiian is entirely fair, after all that is a lot of juicy sweetness to go with cheese, one thing that troubles me deeply is the hypocrisy of people who have the gall to attack pineapple on a pizza while thinking nothing about ordering a buffalo chicken pizza. Because if were are really being honest here, buffalo chicken pizza is maybe the single biggest insult to pizza since Ellio's Pizza opened its doors in 1963. Both the Buffalo Chicken and the Ellio's are clear evidence that New York isn't the innocent place it would have us believe when it is pointing its finger at Chicago.

Back when I was in college, a local Pizza Hut ran out of pizza sauce. They obviously couldn't stop serving pizza, so they used the sauce they used on their pasta dishes instead. The quality of the pizza immediately improved. It seems that the pizza sauce had a ridiculous amount of sugar in it, that the pasta sauce didn't. I like pineapple on pizza but I like my sauce to taste like tomatoes, not candy.

Where I went to school, lunch room pizza had that industrial perforated look (we should all be asking serious questions about why these pizzas needed those holes in the crust). The crust was always floppy, and I am pretty sure the end result didn't actually meet any standard definition of pizza. It was also brilliantly marketed. The lunch room propaganda machine somehow managed to get us excited every week that pizza friday was around the bend. One bite and you remembered their words we all lies

Our pizza, in high school, were those little individual frozen ones. They were always soggy because they had been sitting in an industrial freezer, likely for months, and the cheese had litterally no flavour left in it. They were pretty much red and yellow slop, served on cardboard. I stuck to ham and cheese bagels after my first attempt at the pizza.

 

[glass]

The truth is pineapple pizza is delicious.

That may be your truth. It certainly isn't mine.

 

[RealAlHazred]

But I think we can all agree, the absolute best pizza that has ever been offered, anywhere, ever, was McDonald's McPizza in the 80s.

 

[Ryujin]

But I think we can all agree, the absolute best pizza that has ever been offered, anywhere, ever, was McDonald's McPizza in the 80s.

It actually wasn't bad. There was a McD's a fairly long walk away from my high school and I used to go there to get it, when I had a long lunch period. At least it was dusted with corn meal.

 

[payn]

It actually wasn't bad. There was a McD's a fairly long walk away from my high school and I used to go there to get it, when I had a long lunch period. At least it was dusted with corn meal.

Aw, they included the pleasing grit!

 

[Bedrockgames]

Aw, they included the pleasing grit!

Corn meal adds a good crunch to the crust, but I would be wary of a McD's pizza

 

[Orius]

Like Pizza hut? You mean the pizza that every time someone took a bite, OPEC cut back on production because there was a sudden influx of excess oil in the world?

Ha, I used to work at a Pizza Hut and it's not supposed to be that much oil. Of course, the under motivated teen workers are not incapable of pumping enough oil in to give Saudi Arabia a collective stroke.

I love American pizza, but I woundn't know where to get it here in Rome. Typical Italian pizzas are typically "fixed", i.e. you choose a kind (such as "margherita", "quattro formaggi", "capricciosa") and you normally don't customize the toppings.

It's probably another example of America bastardizing cultural cuisine again.

Without the oil it takes two root beers to wash down. Trust me, you don’t want it with less oil

It's more like you don't want it at all unless the only alternative is shudder Domino's.

So yeah, Pineapple good. pineapple on pizza is a crime.

The sort of crime you send to the Hague, on the level of the crime against bovinity known as meatloaf.

Back when I was in college, a local Pizza Hut ran out of pizza sauce. They obviously couldn't stop serving pizza, so they used the sauce they used on their pasta dishes instead. The quality of the pizza immediately improved. It seems that the pizza sauce had a ridiculous amount of sugar in it, that the pasta sauce didn't. I like pineapple on pizza but I like my sauce to taste like tomatoes, not candy.

There's this local pizza place a few blocks away that dumps a metric asston of sugar in their sauce. It's absolutely vile, and it's on an overcooked pizza with a crust that's only a few steps above cardboard.

They have tasty cinnamon knots though.

Corn meal adds a good crunch to the crust, but I would be wary of a McD's pizza

I would be wary of anything from McDonald's.

 

[Ryujin]

Corn meal adds a good crunch to the crust, but I would be wary of a McD's pizza

Admittedly, the best thing about it was that you could have it in maybe 5 minutes, without it having sat under a heat lamp for hours. It was better than the pizza at my high school and about as good as the cheap chain place, but worse than a good shop.

 

[CleverNickName]

Moving this to the proper thread....

I started off with this:

Canned anything on a pizza is going to taste like it came from a can, or the texture is going to be all wrong. I think the worst offenders are mushrooms and pizza sauce.

The last pizza I ate was a Detroit-style bacon, jalapeno, and pineapple pizza, with a pint of local microbrew on the side. It was a damn fine dinner.

And then the responses were:

Hot take: can flavor is good, actually

Disagree. Canned mushrooms are far superior on pizza than fresh.

To each their own, obviously. I'm trying to get better at this "not expressing my opinions as matters-of-fact" thing.

The metallic taste of canned tomatoes, pineapples, and other acidic foods can be cooked out if you take the time to simmer or fry them first...but a lot of pizzerias just put the canned sauce right onto the raw dough. Unfortunately, that 10-15 minutes in the oven isn't enough time to cook out that metallic can-flavor. There's not much you can do about non-acidic canned foods, like mushrooms...that flavor is there to stay.

But, ya know, maybe that's what you're into?