D&D General How you would have done the Dungeons and Dragons' movie - 80's edition

[Parmandur]

Well, thats the million dollar question. Nobody knows what D&D is like. Thats all in the design as it allows folks to make their own stories so its not got a strong identity. Thats a bit of a killer when you want a brand recognition in media.

Though, if they made a serious epic with R rating, it wouldnt sell. Be like the last Mortal Combat movie.

Yeah, my personal experience tracks somewhere between Legends of Vox Machina and Honor Among Thieves (maybe with some Monty Python thrown in).

 

[Zardnaar]

.

What are you basing this success on? The Wall with Matt Damon? World of Warcraft with whoever was in that movie?

Recent fantasy fair that has been successful is aimed at adults. GoT, BG3, RoP, WoT. Hell Witcher and Sandman.

Dosnt need to be R rated but yeah results.

 

[payn]

.

Recent fantasy fair that has been successful is aimed at adults. GoT, BG3, RoP, WoT. Hell Witcher and Sandman.

Dosnt need to be R rated but yeah results.

Those aint movies with theatrical releases.

 

[TiQuinn]

Those aint movies with theatrical releases.

Also, a little tough to judge the success of some of those since streaming services don't really disclose viewing numbers.

 

[Shades of Eternity]

With my luck, I'd grab the video from the store and end up with the "artistic movie" Dragon in the Dungeon, <bow chicka wow wow>..

 

[MostlyHarmless42]

So blatant homophobia or homosexual vibes? Which is it going to be?

Implied racism, sexism, homophobia? Okay, but why is that specifically an 80s trait? Have you watched any comedies from the 90s or 00s?

As for the power metal/Queen stuff - okay, I'm thinking of Flash Gordon and Highlander. Both still highly watched as cult classics. But I can name a whole lot of other fantasy movies that had none of those. Conan The Barbarian? Dragonslayer? Clash of the Titans? Krull? Think you missed the mark here.

Weinstein got his start in the 80s in arthouse style movies but I feel he hit his stride in the 90s, so that feels out of place.

Toxic bullying is simply a product of the 80s? News to me.

Product placement and toy tie-ins are just relegated to the 80s? Really?

If you aren't aware of just how much homophobia is rooted in closeted repressed homosexuals self hating their own, you probably should spend time talking to more lgbtq+ people.

And if you can't see how sweaty and oily shirtless men in loin cloths wrestling one another is hilariously queer coded, that's a you problem. Most of the Conan fantasy barbarian archetype is rooted heavily in Greek, Mediterranean and pre-Christian monotheistic cultures. All of whom we all know were clearly well known for their purely heterosexual leanings, obviously. (Seeing as this is the internet, yes, I will point out that this is sarcasm).

The Queen bit was more a joke on my part. As I said before, I despise electric instruments and rock music in fantasy. That's just my personal preference, but if you are really going to tell me that hair metal and power ballads weren't a literal defining part of 80s culture, I'm calling bulls%#&. This is even more hilarious is of open up this discussion to heavy metal and fantasy films made post 80s that were clearly trying to evoke an 80s esthetic. Hell, heavy metal magazine was arguably just as influential as Conan and Krull on the fantasy genre. Like I said, I despise this connection with a raging passion, but I'm not denying it exists. Speaking of Conan and Krull...see my previous comments about sweaty oily shirtless men.

In regards to Winestein, stright from Wikipedia:

Among the actresses who claim to have suffered harassment or rape by Weinstein are Rose McGowan, Angelina Jolie, Mira Sorvino, Paz de la Huerta, Annabella Sciorra and Gwyneth Paltrow. Another, Italian actress Asia Argento, collated a list of sexual abuse accusations against Weinstein.[139] The incidents alleged in the list date from 1980 to 2015 and include 18 complaints of rape.[139] In them, it is alleged that Weinstein granted important roles in films in exchange for sexual favors. As a result, the Weinstein Company and the Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences decided to expel Weinstein.

Now, I could literally spend the next hour and half digging through the dozen if not hundreds of examples of Hollywood's well known and well documented history of sexual harassment and other similar scandals, but something tells me that's a discussion neither of us really want to have and quite likely will verge into territory breaking forum rules, but, hey, if you really want to ignore the obvious industry wide issue and instead to cherry pick apart one example, by all means. (And again, to make it clear for everyone out there, yes, this is not an 80s only issue, though if you are going to argue that the modern times are as bad as the 80s in this such, the fact that we are even discussing Weinstein or could reference other sex offenders and rapists like Bill Cosby even as passing jokes is clear evidence of the times having changed).

In terms of 80s bullying? My dude. The 80s practically created the trope of the high school bully. Well, that and the made coke fueled ravings of Stephen King. Ace Merrill in 'Stand By Me' (1986), Mick in 'Teen Wolf' (1985),
Stan Gable in 'Revenge of the Nerds' (1984), Scut Farkus in 'A Christmas Story' (1983) (albeit this was supposed to be set in the 40s? 50s?), Andrew Clark in 'The Breakfast Club' (1985), Judy in 'Sleepaway Camp' (1983),
Biff Tannen in 'Back to the Future' (1985), and Johnny Lawrence in 'The Karate Kid' (1984). Hell, the Goonies (198) practically is a damned RPG tabletop campaign, just not a fantasy and they had Troy and the Hillside bullies. The 80s were the decade that is quite literally the template for bullying in fiction.

And are you really going to tell me that He-Man, Transformers, Thundercats, and G.I. Joe aren't basically just animated toy ads? Don't get me wrong, I actually prefer these cartoons and older toy tie in things from that decade, but let's not kid here. I mean hell, there's being ignorant and then there's being oblivious.

All of this is precisely what I mean by rose-tinted goggles. Contrary to what the other person said, I don't hate the 80s. Quite the opposite. I just don't think the 80s esthetic fits DnD, and I don't like people sanding off the rough edges of previous decades to fit their nostalgic 'member berries narrative. If you want an 80s movie, you take it warts and all.

Of note, I could equally criticize any other decade just as much. Modern times, for example? The writing of most films now a days is absolute sh&% compared older decades. And practical effects are basically a dying art because none of the modern special effects artists were taught how to actually use the older techniques. And I'm not even one of those people who blindly bashes CG. It has a time and a place. The point is take credit and give criticism where due.

 

[TiQuinn]

If you aren't aware of just how much homophobia is rooted in closeted repressed homosexuals self hating their own, you probably should spend time talking to more lgbtq+ people.

And if you can't see how sweaty and oily shirtless men in loin cloths wrestling one another is hilariously queer coded, that's a you problem. Most of the Conan fantasy barbarian archetype is rooted heavily in Greek, Mediterranean and pre-Christian monotheistic cultures. All of whom we all know were clearly well known for their purely heterosexual leanings, obviously. (Seeing as this is the internet, yes, I will point out that this is sarcasm).

The Queen bit was more a joke on my part. As I said before, I despise electric instruments and rock music in fantasy. That's just my personal preference, but if you are really going to tell me that hair metal and power ballads weren't a literal defining part of 80s culture, I'm calling bulls%#&. This is even more hilarious is of open up this discussion to heavy metal and fantasy films made post 80s that were clearly trying to evoke an 80s esthetic. Hell, heavy metal magazine was arguably just as influential as Conan and Krull on the fantasy genre. Like I said, I despise this connection with a raging passion, but I'm not denying it exists. Speaking of Conan and Krull...see my previous comments about sweaty oily shirtless men.

In regards to Winestein, stright from Wikipedia:

Now, I could literally spend the next hour and half digging through the dozen if not hundreds of examples of Hollywood's well known and well documented history of sexual harassment and other similar scandals, but something tells me that's a discussion neither of us really want to have and quite likely will verge into territory breaking forum rules, but, hey, if you really want to ignore the obvious industry wide issue and instead to cherry pick apart one example, by all means. (And again, to make it clear for everyone out there, yes, this is not an 80s only issue, though if you are going to argue that the modern times are as bad as the 80s in this such, the fact that we are even discussing Weinstein or could reference other sex offenders and rapists like Bill Cosby even as passing jokes is clear evidence of the times having changed).

In terms of 80s bullying? My dude. The 80s practically created the trope of the high school bully. Well, that and the made coke fueled ravings of Stephen King. Ace Merrill in 'Stand By Me' (1986), Mick in 'Teen Wolf' (1985),
Stan Gable in 'Revenge of the Nerds' (1984), Scut Farkus in 'A Christmas Story' (1983) (albeit this was supposed to be set in the 40s? 50s?), Andrew Clark in 'The Breakfast Club' (1985), Judy in 'Sleepaway Camp' (1983),
Biff Tannen in 'Back to the Future' (1985), and Johnny Lawrence in 'The Karate Kid' (1984). Hell, the Goonies (198) practically is a damned RPG tabletop campaign, just not a fantasy and they had Troy and the Hillside bullies. The 80s were the decade that is quite literally the template for bullying in fiction.

And are you really going to tell me that He-Man, Transformers, Thundercats, and G.I. Joe aren't basically just animated toy ads? Don't get me wrong, I actually prefer these cartoons and older toy tie in things from that decade, but let's not kid here. I mean hell, there's being ignorant and then there's being oblivious.

All of this is precisely what I mean by rose-tinted goggles. Contrary to what the other person said, I don't hate the 80s. Quite the opposite. I just don't think the 80s esthetic fits DnD, and I don't like people sanding off the rough edges of previous decades to fit their nostalgic 'member berries narrative. If you want an 80s movie, you take it warts and all.

Of note, I could equally criticize any other decade just as much. Modern times, for example? The writing of most films now a days is absolute sh&% compared older decades. And practical effects are basically a dying art because none of the modern special effects artists were taught how to actually use the older techniques. And I'm not even one of those people who blindly bashes CG. It has a time and a place. The point is take credit and give criticism where due.

You know, I was gonna basically write a big “So What” response to all of this when it suddenly dawned on me.

You didn’t even read the first post. You don’t even understand what this thread is about. It’s about a podcast, part of which discussed how Gary Gygax was attempting to get a D&D movie made.

That was in the 1980’s in case you’re were wondering.

And I still have no idea what Harvey Weinstein has to do with any of this.

 

[Dioltach]

I think it is massive underappeciated as an authentic old school pulp Sword & Sorcery, more true to the source material than the first (admittedly better) movie.

One of the few films for which I own the novelization of, actually, which was directly responsible for setting off my favorite book series of all time:

I remember picking up the Conan Chronicles after the first few WoT books came out (when they were still readable), and being very excited about one of my favourite authors doing one of my favourite characters.

I was disappointed, to say the least.

Interestingly, I was at a Q&A with RJ once, and he stated outright (I don't remember what the question was), "I don't do novelisations." Unfortunately I didn't get the chance to remind him of Conan the Destroyer.

 

[Dannyalcatraz]

Mod Note:

@MostlyHarmless42 , if you’re going to post a treatise on how you feel about a thread’s topic, you should probably make sure you’re actually addressing the thread’s topic. Your recent posts in this thread are wildly off-topic, namely, making a D&D movie 40+ years ago, NOT making an 80s style movie today.

Everyone, how about we return to the thread’s actual topic?

 

[HaroldTheHobbit]

As to 80ies esthetics and D&D: Yes, for me 80ies fantasy movies are way more Dungeon Crawl Classics than D&D, but without the tech or budget to make the gonzo and grand elements non-comic. Imho that's why movies like Krull are such amazing golden nuggets with sweet cheese filling. And that's why my softie, no-budget Italian fantasy 80ies movie still would be such a success in the VHS rental scene.