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1000 ways to be a D&D Snob
- Thread starter clockworkjoe
- Start date
Dark Jezter
First Post
198. You grit your teeth in anger whenever someone says "Where are the Cheetoes?" or "Where's the Mountain Dew?"
Dark Jezter
First Post
Here are a few more ideas that a friend of mine thought up. Thanks Drakstern!
201. You get pissed off if anyone even *mentions* anime at an RPG con.
202. You've said something and then thought "Damn, that's just what my *Character's name* would say."
203. You then say it in your next game.
204. You think M:TG is satanic and Pokemon is Satan.
205. You think that any rule not personally written by Gygax is to be discarded.
206. You think that DM's that let their players start with 'established' characters are accomplices to munckinism.
207. You don't think stats above 12 should be allowed.
208. You play only play as, or refuse to play as, Paladins.
209. You play a Paladin and manage to keep him Lawful Good and *not* have a giant stick up his ass.
210. You *were* the gazebo destroyer.
211. You think anyone who touches a White Wolf game is a 'poseur goth'.
212. You include anyone who touches Scarred Lands in that.
213. You think background music is for 'newbs.'
214. You think any dwarf without 'ax' 'beard' or 'biter' in his name is no dwarf.
215. You think that a good Drow was a stupid idea for a story hook. A good Duergar would've been much better.
201. You get pissed off if anyone even *mentions* anime at an RPG con.
202. You've said something and then thought "Damn, that's just what my *Character's name* would say."
203. You then say it in your next game.
204. You think M:TG is satanic and Pokemon is Satan.
205. You think that any rule not personally written by Gygax is to be discarded.
206. You think that DM's that let their players start with 'established' characters are accomplices to munckinism.
207. You don't think stats above 12 should be allowed.
208. You play only play as, or refuse to play as, Paladins.
209. You play a Paladin and manage to keep him Lawful Good and *not* have a giant stick up his ass.
210. You *were* the gazebo destroyer.
211. You think anyone who touches a White Wolf game is a 'poseur goth'.
212. You include anyone who touches Scarred Lands in that.
213. You think background music is for 'newbs.'
214. You think any dwarf without 'ax' 'beard' or 'biter' in his name is no dwarf.
215. You think that a good Drow was a stupid idea for a story hook. A good Duergar would've been much better.
Tiefling
First Post
216. You insist that anyone who prefers a different style of play is either a "munchkin" or a "D&D snob.'
217. You insist that some styles of play are inherently superior to others.
218. You hate Drizzt not for a good reason, such as the fact that he's a really, really boring character, but for a silly reason, such as that he is "munckin."
217. You insist that some styles of play are inherently superior to others.
218. You hate Drizzt not for a good reason, such as the fact that he's a really, really boring character, but for a silly reason, such as that he is "munckin."
219. Lunched with other D20 publishing company presidents just so you could later publicly claim friendship with them.
220. Saw that the Monster Manual in 3rd edition was missing favorite monster, then made an unholy pact with the devil to make your version the official one. After 3 drafts, a rejected article, and a miscredit, yours does become the official version.
221. Mentioned by name and praised in the first letter to the editor in an issue of Dragon.
224. Accused of writing a piece of material that is merely marketting fodder for the big corporate devil (but what do they know, because they work at McDonalds!!)
223. Constantly feel the need to gain acceptance among a community of gamers by making posts that remind them of your claims to fame.
224. Take yourself so seriously that you would never even think of striking up a casual conversation with an actual gamer in your local game store.
220. Saw that the Monster Manual in 3rd edition was missing favorite monster, then made an unholy pact with the devil to make your version the official one. After 3 drafts, a rejected article, and a miscredit, yours does become the official version.
221. Mentioned by name and praised in the first letter to the editor in an issue of Dragon.
224. Accused of writing a piece of material that is merely marketting fodder for the big corporate devil (but what do they know, because they work at McDonalds!!)
223. Constantly feel the need to gain acceptance among a community of gamers by making posts that remind them of your claims to fame.
224. Take yourself so seriously that you would never even think of striking up a casual conversation with an actual gamer in your local game store.
cptg1481
First Post
Here are a few of my favorite snobs rules...
226. You take extreem pride in the fact that no matter what level your players are they will "never" have near the amount of wealth listed in Table 5-1 of the DMG, page 145. Ten percent of this amount should be enough for any real gamer to achieve satisfaction.
227. In "your world" there is no such thing as an NPC with equipment worth near at what is indicated on Table 2-44 of the DMG. page 58. A 15th level frost giant fighter only "needs" a masterwork weapon, a loin cloth and a few barrels of ale after all. Note: All barrels of ale are to be thrown at players so they can't have them either.
228. Your players will never have enough assets to use any of the publised feats like, create wonderous items, landlord, or any others that require a certain amount of gold. After all, your fabulous story line, and magnificent in deapth style role playing should be compensation enough. Besides, only a munchkin would ever assume that he was mighty or presumtuous enough to even contemplate building a stronghold or makeing his "own" magic items. Real gamers have no preset goals for thier characters other than those approved or determined by you.
229. When questioned on any of the three previous state, that you'd rather find all new players than change the vision of your homebrew world.
226. You take extreem pride in the fact that no matter what level your players are they will "never" have near the amount of wealth listed in Table 5-1 of the DMG, page 145. Ten percent of this amount should be enough for any real gamer to achieve satisfaction.
227. In "your world" there is no such thing as an NPC with equipment worth near at what is indicated on Table 2-44 of the DMG. page 58. A 15th level frost giant fighter only "needs" a masterwork weapon, a loin cloth and a few barrels of ale after all. Note: All barrels of ale are to be thrown at players so they can't have them either.
228. Your players will never have enough assets to use any of the publised feats like, create wonderous items, landlord, or any others that require a certain amount of gold. After all, your fabulous story line, and magnificent in deapth style role playing should be compensation enough. Besides, only a munchkin would ever assume that he was mighty or presumtuous enough to even contemplate building a stronghold or makeing his "own" magic items. Real gamers have no preset goals for thier characters other than those approved or determined by you.
229. When questioned on any of the three previous state, that you'd rather find all new players than change the vision of your homebrew world.
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