A competition for free CS accounts!

[Drew]

As a classic rock DJ, I had to take on an Eagles tune...


Hotel Eric Noah
On a dark August Evening
Nineteen-ninety nine
Stale smell of Doritos
I was searching online
I clicked “Feeling Lucky” on Google
And saw a red and black site
My heart beat faster and my eyes grew wide
I read the news the whole night
There it sat on my computer
Third Edition sneak peak
And I was thinking to myself
This could be awesome or this could be weak
Then I clicked a link called “boards”
And it showed me the way
There were postings on the forums there
I thought I heard them say

Welcome to the Hotel Eric Noah
Such a lovely place
Such a lovely place (background)
Such a geeky place
Plenty of news at the Hotel Eric Noah
Any time of year
Any time of year (background)
They will post it here

Their minds are D20 twisted
The reviews they try to heed
But they’ve got lots of pretty, pretty books
They say they really need
How they post on the EN Boards
Sweet crunch and sweet fluff
Some post in great numbers
Some think lurking’s enough
So I posted on the General Forum
Please pay my DM fee
They said
That joke was old a long time ago, that troll won’t work on me
And still those boards are calling from far away
Take up your time in the middle of work
Just to let you say

Welcome to the Hotel Eric Noah
Such a lovely place
Such a lovely place (background)
Such a geeky place
They’re houseruling it up at the Hotel Eric Noah
What a nice homebrew
What a nice homebrew (background)
Dinosaur Ninjas in Malibu

Eric had to step down
Return to his normal life
And he said,
I have to focus on the library,
D&D, and my wife
And on the message boards
We thought the end was in sight
But Pirate Cat and Morrus said
“We just can’t kill the site!”
The next thing I remember
The site was good as new
There were posts, scoops, and reviews
Just like it was before
Relax said the admins
We are all your chums
You can login any time you’d like
At least until Fourth Edition comes!

Welcome to the Hotel Eric Noah
It’s called ENWorld
It’s called ENWorld (background)
And it’s a lovely place
Plenty of friends at the Hotel Eric Noah
Any time of year
Any time of year (background)
You can find them here

 

[Ranes]

To the tune of "Suicide is Painless" (theme from M*A*S*H)

D&D is hard to play
Well 3.5 is anyway
And now on EN World they say
That fourth edition's on its way

(Chorus)
And EN World is stayin'
It keeps those addicts playin'
And I can post or lurk there if I please

My PC died again today
Because a ruling went astray
I asked DMs here what they'd say
And Hypersmurf said, "Hey, no way!"

(Chorus)

Diaglo has an axe to grind
But EN Worlders, they don't mind
When he says, "If you leave behind
OD&D you must be blind"

(Chorus)

Piratecat's the one to blame
For putting DMs here to shame
For not running a first rate game
I know because I feel the same

(Chorus)

If you are feeling unhappy
Just read a post by MerricB
Sure enough you will soon see
Optimism ain't history

(Chorus)

The postings they go on and on
Involving almost everyone
Some people think it's Crothian
But the one to blame is Quasqueton

(Chorus)

This wasn't meant to be a song
That lingered on for much too long
But if you wonder what went wrong
It nearly didn't mention Hong

 

[Tinner]

Since EN World is like a super-group of all the greatest players and GM’s around, it just makes sense to use a song that was recorded by just such a super-group.

We Are EN World (We are the World)

There comes a time
When we head a certain call
When gamers must come together as one
There are PC’s dying
And it's time to lend a hand or dice
To the greatest games of all

We can't log on
Pretending day by day
That someone somewhere will soon out-post Crothian
We are all a part of
The gaming community
And the truth, you know games are all we need

[Chorus]
We are EN World
We are the gamers
We are the ones who make the site so great
So let's start posting
There's a point we're making
We're saving our campaigns
It's true we'll make a better game
Just you and me

Send them your hat (of d02)
So they'll know no limit now
And their games will be more like Diaglo’s
As Piratecat has shown us by TPKing PC’s dead
So we all must become rat-bastard DM’s

[Chorus]
We are EN World
We are the gamers
We are the ones who make the site so great
So let's start posting
There's a point we're making
We're saving our campaigns
It's true we'll make a better game
Just you and me

When you're down and out
And it seems there’s no games at all
Just log-in and read
Story-hours and PbP’s will enthrall
Well, well, well, well, let us realize
That if the General forum is dull
There’s always Off-Topic to keep us amused

[Chorus]
We are EN World
We are the gamers
We are the ones who make the site so great
So let's start giving
There's a point we're making
We're saving our campaigns
It's true we'll make a better game
Just you and me

 

[Rel]

I wrote this a while back and I've posted it a couple times before. I'm probably handicapping myself by using a country song (not the preferred musical genre of most RPG players from what I've seen) but what the heck...

"I Love This Board" (to the tune of "I Love This Bar" by Toby Keith):

Tribute to ENWorld: I Love This Board

We got DM’s,
We got players,
Min-maxers and slayers
We got Noah
We got Morrus
We got buddies who know us
And the crowd here will stat up your orcish horde
Hmmm, Hmmm, Hmmm, Hmmm, Hmmm, I love this board.

We got Cthulhu
We got Core Rules
Story Hour Threads and House Rules
And we got Roll-Play
We got Roleplay
Three legged cats and guys called "Clay"
And we’ll suggest feats for your Bard/Half-Minotaur
Hmmm, Hmmm, Hmmm, Hmmm, Hmmm, I love this board.

I love this board
It’s my kind of place,
Just loggin’ on the front page,
Puts a big smile on my face,
You won’t be bored
Talk ‘bout your Verdant Lord
Hmmm, Hmmm, Hmmm, Hmmm, Hmmm, I love this board.

I’ve seen Dinkeldogs
We’ve got Henry
Crothian’s posts are many
And we got Smurfs
That are Hyper
Studyin’ rules since he’s been in diapers
And Mark’s got DM’s Advice – Oh thank the Lord
Hmmm, Hmmm, Hmmm, Hmmm, Hmmm, I love this board. (yes I do)

Rel: I like my dice

Board Members: I like my dice

Rel: And I like my battlemat

Board Members: I like my battlemat

I like to thumb through all my Splatbooks, I like all that gaming crap…

But I love this board
It’s my kind of place
Just readin’ about Wulf Ratbane,
Puts a big smile on my face,
The wisdom stored
Can’t be ignored
Hmmm, Hmmm, Hmmm, Hmmm, Hmmm, I love this board.
Hmmm, Hmmm, Hmmm, Hmmm, Hmmm, I just love this old board.

 

[Angel Tarragon]

Monsters (Gotta kill 'em all)
to the theme of the original Pokemon Movie

I want my character to be the very best
Like no PC ever was
To battle them is my real test
To kill them is my cause

I will travel through the underdark
Killing far and wide
Each monster, to understand
The experience that’s inside

Monsters (Gotta kill them all)
Its my sword and me
I know it’s my destiny
Monsters
(oh) You’re my worst enemy
In a world that must be cleansed
Monsters (Gotta kill ‘em all)
Hack and slash
My levels will pull me through
They strike at me and I’ll kill them
Monsters
Gotta kill ‘em all
Gotta kill ‘em all

Every monster along the way
With my sword I will face
I will battle everyday
To claim my rightful xp

Battling against them the time is right
There’s no better fighter
Sword and fist I’ll win the fight
It’s always been my dream

Monsters (Gotta kill ‘em all)
It’s my sword and me
I know it’s my destiny
Monsters
(oh) You’re my worst enemy
In a world that must be cleansed
Monsters (Gotta kill ‘em all)
Hack and slash
My levels will pull me through
They strike at me and I’ll kill them
Monsters
Gotta kill ‘em all
Gotta kill ‘em all
Gotta kill ‘em all
Gotta kill ‘em all
Gotta kill ‘em all, yeah

Monsters (Gotta kill ‘em all)
It’s my sword and me
I know its my destiny
Monsters
(oh) You’re my worst enemy
In a world that must be cleansed
Monsters (Gotta kill ‘em all)
Hack and slash
My levels will pull me through
They strike at me and I’ll kill them
Monsters
Gotta kill ‘em all
Gotta kill ‘em all
Moh-ohn-sters.

 

[Prest0]

Funny, funny stuff! I want to keep reading more, so we'll help encourage this contest and reward creativity. 12 to Midnight will pitch in a PDF copy of Brainwashed and Fear Effects.

 

[eris404]

One Week - from the song of the same name by the Barenaked Ladies

Jack, you have my vote - and bonus points for using a Barenaked Ladies song.

 

[Alzrius]

This'll probably be the last song I use from that play.

Forum of Forums (sung to the tune of "Miracle of Miracles" from "Fiddler on the Roof")

Forum of forums, EN World oh EN World
I found you on Google one day
Just one glance at you, EN World oh EN World
Then registered right away

Website of websites, EN World oh EN World
With members in such large amounts
But I’ll surpass them, EN World oh EN World
By raising up my post count

Nothingland has their forums; that is a messageboard
WotC has their own forums; that is a messageboard too

But of all the messageboards that are out there
The one that’s moderated most fair
Is the one with the rules that make us “aw”
‘Cause they’re for Eric’s grandma

Community ours, EN World oh EN World
Your members love you with fervor;
Just last November, EN World oh EN World
We got you a new server

Now you run much faster (yes!); this is our messageboard
Morrus may be the webmaster yes, but this is our messageboard too

But of all the time that I’ve spent here of late
The thing that would make it truly great
Is the one thing I can’t do without
I want a CS account

 

[Jack of Shadows]

Jack, you have my vote - and bonus points for using a Barenaked Ladies song.

Woot! It was the only song I could think of that would let me cram lots of people in. And I didn't even use half the names I had written down.

Jack

 

[Funeris]

For those of you that don't know me...I spend the majority of my time in the Story Hour forums...so this one's dedicated to all those folks...

Parody of Metallica's Enter Sandman

Open Storyhour

Bump your threads everyone
Telling tales now won
of battles that’r fun

Read some ‘Cat, read some Herremann,
bet you read some “Sins”
till your caught up and done…

wait for five or six months
still no updates in sight

And at work
Its no quirk
Log back in
We’re off to story hour land

Cannot sleep, up all night
update thrice tonight
eyes’r blurring from low light

games with war, games with lichs
Ledded’s has the Reich
and superheroes with might

Re-read Ratbane’s again
Humor never reached such heights

Back at work
Its no quirk
Log back in
we’re off to story hour land

now I cannot even sleep
"Sam the Red”, she makes me weep
These tales, my thirst they will slake
Blackdirge’s yarns make me quake

watch now reader, just bump the thread
and keep the tale alive not dead
for those readers who have not read
from their desks, even from their bed

Back at work
Its no quirk
Just a fan

Back at work
Its no quirk
Log back in
we’re off to story hour land...