A Generic 4E Opinion Thread: Hold the Mushrooms, Please

[CleverNickName]

If you substitute the word "pizza" for all references to D&D, and if you substitute the word "mushroom" for any particular aspect of 4th Edition, you can boil down most of the 4E opinion threads here into something that looks a lot like this:

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Gamer 1: "I love pizza, but I don't care for mushrooms. I would like to discuss ordering a pizza without mushrooms."

Gamer 2: "What? Pizza without mushrooms isn't really pizza at all. Unless you pile lots of mushrooms on your pizza, I can't see how you can possibly claim to still be eating pizza."

Gamer 1: "Wait. What?"

Gamer 2: "I bet you haven't had mushrooms on your pizza before. Why don't you try them before you form an opinion?"

Gamer 1: "But I have tried them. I had them the last time I came in here, and I didn't care for the taste."

Gamer 2: "Eating mushrooms only once isn't 'trying them,' according to the rules I just made up. You need to eat buckets of mushrooms, daily, for several months, before I will accept your opinion."

Gamer 1: "That's absurd! Why would I force myself to eat a pizza that I know I won't enjoy, when I'm the one paying for it?"

Gamer 2: "As a self-acclaimed connoisseur of pizza toppings, I refuse to believe that anyone could seriously hate the taste of mushrooms, particularly on pizza. So clearly, your opinion is wrong."

Gamer 1: "How can it be 'wrong?' It's an opinion, not a statement of fact."

Gamer 2: "Look. You knew that we used mushrooms before you walked in the door. So I want to know why would you come to this mushroom-using establishment, and complain about mushrooms in the first place?! I think you are just trolling for an argument."

Gamer 1: "I'm not trolling. I just want a pizza without mushrooms, and I would like to discuss how can that be done most effectively."

Gamer 2: "Why do you hate the mushroom growers? They work hard to bring you all of these delicious mushrooms, and this is how you repay them. They have families to feed, you know."

Gamer 1: "It's not personal, I just don't like the taste."

Gamer 2: "Beat it, straw man! I'm sorry that you are blind to the truth. Go eat your stupid mushroomless non-pizza somewhere else. Next!"

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Please comment and express your own opinions...but let's keep the discussion in terms of pizza and pizza toppings! Come on, it will be fun...or different, at least.

 

[gonesailing]

Well I hate anchovies on pizza, but fresh (and I mean Fresh) anchovies marinated in olive oil and lemon is the food of the gods.

So give me a pizza with mushrooms and lots of meat, but leave the anchovies on the side

 

[jdrakeh]

I think the conversation in the OP is too generous. Most of those conversations seem to start out like this:

Gamer 1: "I like my pizza without mushrooms and if you have a problem with that, then you're a ing moron and a traitor to the cause!"

Gamer 2: Yeah, well, you, too.

 

[WhatGravitas]

Wait, this is a generic food metaphor, right?

Honging for more, LT.

 

[Dog Moon]

I don't like mushrooms, but I'm sure with a little bit of work, we could easily replace them with pepperoni.

 

[Mustrum_Ridcully]

Mushroom? Where are the badgers? Where's the snake?

...

Otherwise, I am not sure if that's what you wanted to achieve, but interestingly, the genericness is so strong that I couldn't even tell you which side is which.

 

[Silvercat Moonpaw]

Interestingly I don't like mushrooms or tomatoes normally, but I've had mushrooms on pizza that contains tomato sauce and liked it.

I think it's not just what you put on the pizza, but how all the flavors mingle.

 

[WhatGravitas]

Otherwise, I am not sure if that's what you wanted to achieve, but interestingly, the genericness is so strong that I couldn't even tell you which side is which.

Which is *very* telling, I think.

Cheers, LT.

 

[Wisdom Penalty]

I think the conversation in the OP is too generous. Most of those conversations seem to start out like this:

Gamer 1: "I like my pizza without mushrooms and if you have a problem with that, then you're a ing moron and a traitor to the cause!"

Gamer 2: Yeah, well, you, too.

Hehe. I think you did a better - and by 'better' I mean accurate - food-based metaphor in 2 lines than the OP did in 15.

Btw, I hate mushrooms.

Wis

 

[CleverNickName]

Sometimes it doesn't even have to be about the pizza toppings; the packaging can be cause for a heated discussion. My pizza was delivered in a warped box, which won't close properly.

I've been told that this happened with the previous pizza boxes, I should have expected it, and I am silly for pointing it out. But still, my box is warped and all of my other boxes are nice and straight. It bothers me.