RPG Evolution: Game Cancelled, Now What?

Picture courtesy of Pixabay.​

The cancellation of your regular tabletop gaming session can have a surprisingly significant psychological impact on players, and it certainly affects me as game master. There's no single word to summarize the disappointment in missing a game, which is why I turned to other languages for help.

Meet Fernweh​

One possible candidate is Fernweh, a German word that describes a longing for distant places or experiences. In the context of a cancelled game, Fernweh seems apt: a longing for the imagined adventures, shared stories, and camaraderie that's part of the tabletop gaming experience.

Longing to game most often manifests as disappointment and frustration when you can't play, ranging from a mild sense of letdown to a more intense feeling of frustration, especially if the cancellation was unexpected, poorly communicated, or due to circumstances beyond your control. If you invested significant time and effort in preparing for the game (creating characters, planning strategies, clearing schedules, etc.), the disappointment can be even more pronounced.

Cancelling is bad enough, but for long-term campaigns, the cancellation can feel like a genuine missed visit to a vacation destination. Long-term gamers can developed strong emotional connections to their characters and the shared narrative. For these games, it's not just disappointment; the cancellation can be depressing too, particularly if the campaign is a way to blow off steam during a particular tough week. If the cancellation is permanent, the Fernweh can turn into grief.

Emotional Damage​

Missing a game is rough, and because tabletop play typically lasts several hours, you might find yourself with more time on your hands than you anticipated. I know I expeirence restlessness and struggle doing something else after I planned for the game; as a game master, I prepare myself mentally to role-play, organize my time, and get ready to "get into character." So it's perhaps unavoidable that I end up feeling a general sense of malaise. Even if I do switch gears, I don't necessarily enjoy other activities as much.

Beyond the disruption, RPGs provide a vital social outlet, potentially the only one for busy adults. The cancellation can disrupt these social connections, leading to feelings of isolation and loneliness, especially if the game is the only time you get to see your friends.

How to Cope​

It's taken me a while to acknowledge this even happens. "It's only a game" does a disservice to the emotional investment in time commitments we all pour into our games. It’s okay to feel disappointed, frustrated, or even sad when a game is cancelled.

Open communication with the gaming group is also crucial. Discussing the cancellation and understanding the reasons behind it can help to alleviate some of the frustration, particularly if the cancellation was due to miscommunication.

Finding alternative outlets for engagement with the hobby can help too. This could involve playing other games (there is an entire genre of beer-and-pretzels games that have sprung up when there are too few players to play a tabletop role-playing game, but enough to still play a game together), reading gaming-related books or articles, watching streams or podcasts, or engaging in online discussions with other gamers. And of course, game masters can work ahead so they have more content for future games.

Finally, you can always just do something else: pursuing other hobbies, spending time with friends and family (outside of the gaming group), exercising, or simply engaging in relaxing activities like reading or listening to music. Prioritizing self-care, such as getting enough sleep, eating well, and practicing relaxation techniques, can also help too so the game isn't the only therapeutic outlet.

It's tough when a game is cancelled, and I'm still working through how to deal with how disruptive it is both to my schedule and my emotions. But odds are high it will happen more than once, so having mitigation strategies before a game is cancelled can go a long way to help you cope.

Still sucks though.

Your Turn: What do you do when your game is cancelled (besides not play)?

 

[MNblockhead]

There are no cancellations only rescheduling. My group doesn't have a regular schedule, there is no way we could all commit to a schedule. At the end of each game session we select a Saturday in the next month that works for all of us. When we started 10 years ago, I ran my campaign so that each session would wrap up in a way that if someone couldn't make it the next session, it wouldn't greatly impact the group. Since I run 8 hour games, it was easy to end a bit early to ensure we didn't end in the middle of combat or other situation that would be awkward if a PC just disappeared or needed to be played by another character.

Over the years, as we found that we were generally able to commit to the date that we chose, I started to run campaigns where it was more important for all PCs to there. The times where we've "needed" to have someone play another person's character or have the PC off doing something else while a PC did a mission or moved the plot forward have been surprisingly rare. So now if someone cant make it I'm more likely to work with the others to reschedule, because the need to do so is rare. If it were more common, I'd go back to sticking to scheduled dates even if someone can't make it but trying to keep sessions more self contained.

I can apply this to a total loss of gaming. I've basically given up and called it quits in the last few years, and tried to find other adjacent hobbies to fill that void, like painting minis, playing more video games, and listening to more music. Sadly, that longing never really goes away, but the anxiety, frustration and disappointment are far more manageable now. Seems like a fair trade.

Have you tried to do more one shots? If someone has to cancel on a one shot, it is less disruptive. I'd miss campaign play, but I would miss not playing at all even more.

 

[Baron Opal II]

Boardgame time for everyone else.

 

[Thomas Shey]

Back in the 1990s, I was in a group in Austin that had to deal with multiple cancellations. Our solution was:

1) Every member of the group had to design at least one campaign to run, in a system of their choice.

2) Every member of the group had to have a character for each campaign.

3) Every week, we scheduled a primary and backup campaign. We expected to play in the primary campaign; the backup would be run in case the primary campaign fell through. That meant every week, each player had to bring their PCs for 2 different campaigns.

4) In the rare event that both RPG campaigns fell through, we’d play board games or M:tG.

That system translated into us almost always playing an RPG on game night unless we decided to play board games, play M:tG, or watch some geeky movie on SciFi or some such.

That also slowed us a lot of space for experimentation. In that group, we actually got involved in 2 playrests. We also had one guy who kept starting and ending campaigns in different RPGs, almost all centered around mecha or other anime/manga type themes.

Out of curiosity, how many of those campaigns had ongoing events as compared to entirely self-contained sessions?

 

[dbm]

We have two groups, a weekly one of GM+3 and a monthly one of GM+5.

For the monthly one we will only play one-down, and since it is so infrequent we would negotiate a different weekend in the month to make that happen.

For the weekly game we try to only role-play with everyone there, occasionally we will play one down. When we can’t all make it we usually play a board game instead and we have a fairly extensive collection between us so there is always something cool to play (last week we played Arcs…)

 

[Baron Opal II]

Our go-tos are becoming Seven Wonders: Architects, Shifting Stones, and Obscurio.