Change a letter, ruin a spell - Xanathar edition!

I couldn’t find my original CALRAS thread to cast Threadromancy on, so here’s a new one.

Simple format - change one letter, ruin a spell. But only from Xanathar’s, this time.

I’ll start:
Druid Grope: a more intimate Hold Person. Druid Spell so usually used on trees.
Earth Trevor: summons a perfectly average man, just made out of soil.
Magic Scone: cause instant heated debate between jam firsters and cream firsters.
Power Word Pail: Very useful for making sand castles at the beach.
Snark: Vicious Mockery without the wit. 1d4 sarcasm damage.
Foul Cage: automatically affects all pets the next time they are taken to the vet. Perfect ‘dish served cold’.
Thunderclop: Make your horse really loud.

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Lightning Colt - summons a young, very fast horse
Firebill - any ducks or geese within range become fire breathing
Meteor Smarm - Blazing thought bubbles filled with super-loud insults plummet to the ground at four different points you can see within range. Each creature in a 40-foot-radius sphere centered on each point you choose must make a Wisdom saving throw. The insults spread around corners. A creature takes 20d6 psychic damage and 20d6 thunder damage on a failed save, or half as much damage on a successful one. A creature in the area of more than one vitriolic burst is affected only once.


Hatnap: Enlarges a hat to enormous size so that the party can rest safely within its confines.

Chard Monster: Conjures an enormous leafy green shambling mound that is rich in vitamin A, K, and C.

Yawn: Immediately ends your concentration, and then next round interrupts the target's concentration (no save)

Lust Devil: Wouldn't you like to know?

Tar Step: Mires the target's feet in sticky tar.

Bust: Breaks the target irreparably. (You were thinking something else weren't you)

Hold Weapon: Immobilizes the target's weapon in space like an immovable rod.

(dupe of magic scone)

Mast Polymorph: Transform the target into a 60' long, 12" diameter wooden pole (+10' length and +2" diameter per slot level)

Power Word Gain: Targets reduce speed by half and have disadvantage on Dexterity checks and saves as their weight triples.

Psychic Stream: Observe your favorite livestream game from anywhere on the prime material plane.

Shake Water: Disorients aquatic creatures and bursts carbonated beverages.

Stork Sphere: Summons a swarm of storks to blind and confuse foes within the area.

Summon Greater Damon: Conjures Jason Bourne to assist you in combat.

Summon Lesser Damon: Conjures Will Hunting to assist you in solving difficult math problems.

Temple of the GEDs: Characters within the area have their Intelligence score increased to 12 for the duration.
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Tidal Rave: all merfolk, tritons, and Sahuagin within range find their weapons changed into glowsticks. As they get down and boogie, there is a 5% chance per raver that their frenzied big-fish-little-fish-cardboard-box moves will cause a devastating tsunami.
Thundercrap: target suffers as if they had eaten a chicken phal curry last night. Consider them incapacitated for 1d6 hours.
Whirlwand: Targets a spellcaster using a wand, rod, or staff to cast their spells. Instantly they are seized with an uncontrollable impulse to twirl their focus like a majorette until the end of your next turn.
Mind Spoke: Causes target to say out loud what they really think, regardless of consequences.
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Lord of the Hidden Layer
Shadow Word - You make dark insinuations against your foe and/or throw insults at it. If any of the target's allies survive, the target's reputation is in tatters for weeks thereafter. Said to be the product of a Shadow Sorcerer / Valor Bard who wanted to create a unique personalized version of Cutting Words.
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Lord of the Hidden Layer
Mind Spoke
Mind Woke. The target suffers from the irresistible urge to deliver him/herself of a diatribe on econo-socio-political affairs. Any assertions and accusations made will be uttered with great vigor and with sincerity.
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Lord of the Hidden Layer
Milf's Acid Arrow --- Um. I'm not sure where I'm going with this..
Mill's Acid Arrow - An encounter with this spell is what finally convinced Don Quixote to retire. It functions as a point-defense measure for windmills. The energy for the magical arrows is built up by the rhythmic actions inside the protected structure.

Rod Staffwand

aka Ermlaspur Flormbator
Tall the Dead. Makes your zombie minions taller.

Crown of Stairs. Summon headgear that allows your allies to climb up to higher places.

Negative energy food. Puts people in a food coma.

Temple of the sods. Umm...yeah...

Enemies around. Summons enemies that surround you and your companions. Why wait to fail wandering monster checks, be proactive!

Summon greater demo. For those critical sales presentations.

Abi-Dalzim's Horrid Jilting. It's a fringe spell, but if you want to get out of a relationship with Abi-Dalzim in the worst way possible, this is the one for you!

Investiture of lice. Somehow this one didn't catch on...

Gavin O.

First Post
Cause Pear: When you're in need of some tasty pears to eat with your bland rations

Wall of land: make a totally normal wall.

Shatter: Whoops, that spell already exists

Shill empowerment: "This DnD thread is brought to you by our wonderful sponsor..."

Wreath of nature: Create a Christmas decoration.
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Li Shenron

Abi Dhalzim's Horrid Tilting: everyone in the affected area bends 90 degrees and can't see what's coming from behind them

Yeast Bond: make friends with bakey products and communicate telepathically with any ale within range

Boner of the Earth: hits target where it really hurts

Blame Arrows: finger-pointing causes instant shame

Rental Prison: paralyzes target and make him pay 10gp for the service


First Post
Gravy domain cleric, clerics who specialise in liquids that compliment roasts

Bar step, a spell that teleports you to the nearest pub

Negative energy food, a spell that makes your dinner undead

Rice knife, a starchy weapon

Fine greater steed, for when your horse owes you money

Druid glove, hand covers for those attuned with nature

And lastly, the Horizon Wa*ker ranger (a certain word that rhymes with banker) which is fairly self explanatory


Warting Wind: Anyone in the area of effect becomes covered in warts.
Swill Empowerment: Transmutes common ale into wine or hard liquor.
Gyrotechnics: Summons a pita filled with rotisserie-cooked meat and vegetables.
Maddening Dorkness: Forces everyone within the area of effect to debate the finer points of a niche culture.

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